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My job feels terrible - because the boss works so badly

2020-11-23T17:26:10.152Z


Monika keeps having arguments with her supervisor: He cleans up employees and leaves important tasks behind. What can Monika do? The career counselor names three options.


Icon: enlarge

Not again.

Whenever the same conflict breaks out, it is time to take a step back - and assess the situation.

Photo: JPM / Image Source / Getty Images

Monika, 49, asks: »As a department head, I keep clashing with our managing director: He interferes in everything, cleans up colleagues in e-mails and does not take on a number of tasks that he should actually do, so that others have more work - which he then accuses of inefficiency.

I'm the only one who really disagrees with him.

I actually like my job, but now it just feels awful to go.

What should I do?"

Dear Monika,

You sound very unhappy and I can well imagine how powerless you feel.

You are right in the middle of it all and the situation seems to be lost and unsolvable.

You have already taken the first step out of the situation: You have turned the question outwards.

You took action.

The second step I would like to recommend to you: make a decision!

Persistence wears down and costs strength that you can put into the decision-making process.

Take the time to deal with the situation in a structured and differentiated manner so that you know your options.

Then you can decide.

You can use the following three alternatives as an approach, which will help you to identify specific ways:

Love it, change it or leave it!

Do it in writing.

You can also have someone you trust interview you who will take notes and act as a sparring partner.

Love it (being able and willing to live with the situation)

Evaluate the situation and check your approach based on these questions:

  • Does my picture of the situation coincide with that of my colleagues?

  • When I look at the situation from his position, what can his motives be and are the motives comprehensible (e.g. the desire for control, resulting from professional or personal uncertainty)?

  • What can the managing director do and what do I appreciate about him?

  • What do I get from staying?

  • What is all good and what do I like about my work?

  • What attitude can help me cope better with the situation?

  • How can I make it more comfortable for myself?

Bottom line:

On a scale from 0 to 10, how likely do I think it is that I can accept the situation and feel joy again?

Change it (wanting and being able to change something in the situation)

Develop strategies and measures to change the situation based on the following questions:

  • What would the target state look like that I wish for?

    What would have to happen for me to continue to enjoy going to work?

  • What's obviously wrong?

  • What have I tried and what was the result?

  • Are there people in the environment who have been successful and have been able to change something?

  • Who are allies?

  • What part do I have in the situation, for example through my way of countering?

    Can I change my conversation behavior and it changes something about the contact with the managing director?

    For example, being less accusatory or provocative, rather asking questions and making suggestions, appreciating him where appropriate, being interested in the person ...

  • What if I am not the one who is contradicting and the others can't duck back?

  • What are my options to change something?

Here are some approaches:

  • Basic discussion with the managing director, possibly with colleagues.

  • Structured feedback in the management team, possibly not only with a focus on the managing director, but on working with each person.

  • Employee survey.

  • Workshop in the management team to define authorizations, decision-making processes and areas of responsibility.

Bottom line:

on a scale from 0 to 10, how likely do I think I can change something?

 Leave it (draw the logical conclusion and leave)

Play through the scenarios and make a plan using the following questions:

  • Do I go or flee?

    Is it due to the situation or can I feel the same elsewhere?

    (Because I always take myself with me.)

  • What are the risks of leaving for me?

  • What are the alternative career options?

  • What can the specific plan look like - in terms of time and content?

For example:

  • Activate network

  • Request a certificate

  • Draft curriculum vitae and sample letters

  • Clarification: What am I good at and what I like to do ...

  • Job research

    • Who can support me morally and / or professionally?

    Bottom line:

    On a scale from 0 to 10, how likely do I think I can walk?

    Whatever you decide, dear Monika, the first step has been taken.

    Every decision has consequences and will demand a lot from you.

    It is possible that you will not be able to choose the "Leave it" option until you have tried to change something.

    If a change succeeds, I hope you enjoy your work in a good environment that you always enjoy going into.

    If your efforts are ineffective, you may find it easier to step outside.

    I wish you the best!

    Icon: The mirror

    Source: spiegel

    All business articles on 2020-11-23

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