The Limited Times

Now you can see non-English news...

Love is Quarantine: experiment to find love in times of coronavirus

2020-04-03T01:51:28.074Z


Two New York flatmates organize blind phone appointments for people around the world


Rance Nix and Thi Q. Lam share a flat in Brooklyn. Before the worldwide spread of the coronavirus, they watched the Netflix reality show Love is Blind . Chapter after chapter. In it, some thirty singles seek the love of their life. But not in the most usual way. They know who their future partner may be on blind dates. They are in adjoining cabins and cannot be seen. A wall separates them that ends any prejudice caused by physical appearances. At least until they decide to commit. Only then can they look at each other for the first time. This program inspired Nix and Lam once confinement was decreed. They decided to help all the isolated people find their better half with a similar project: Love is quarantine.

"We were forced to stay home with nothing worth seeing, so we had to be creative with our free time," says Lam, 27. He runs Garnish Studios, a creative studio where he creates content for food and beverage companies. His partner Nix, 28, is an actor and real estate agent at Brick and Mortar. The initial idea of ​​both was to organize blind telephone appointments between their friends. But what was initially going to be an experiment between colleagues, ended up becoming a much more ambitious project after going viral on social networks. Every week they organize phone appointments between people from all over the world.

Many people, according to Nix, are these days "alone and bored" in their homes. With confinement, "their desire to find love has intensified": "Also, they are getting tired of scrolling on Instagram and swiping left to right in dating apps. They want to have real phone connections. ” So the young men got down to business. They created a spreadsheet for those who wanted to participate. There are already more than 1,000 registered users from practically the entire planet. In the document they indicate their name, age, sexual orientation, contact and place of residence.

In one of the cells appears Alexa Belevskaya, a 22-year-old girl who lives in Moscow. He studies Foreign Trade Management and works in the marketing department of a multinational. "Now I'm not working and that makes me sad, so I'm looking for other activities," he explains. In addition to writing his first novel and listening to the Arctic Monkeys, participating in Love is Quarantine seems like a good option. Although she has not had any appointments so far, she is convinced that isolation does not have to prevent her from finding her “soul mate”: “It is worth trying. I think there is no good or bad situation to find love. It's just about fate. "

Nix and Lam organize two date nights every week. Thus they bring together both homosexual and heterosexual people. And of all ages — some participants are over 60. — At first they contacted those on the list one by one. “Once the idea took off and our Instagram page gained followers, people started sending us videos to participate. From that moment on, we began to choose people based on their enthusiasm and their desire to find love ”, explains Nix.

Getty Images

The lucky ones receive a message. They have never seen each other. They know absolutely nothing about each other. But during one night they are going to have several dates. Each one from his apartment. Nix insists: “Only phone calls are worth it. No texting or FaceTime. " They normally spend between 10 minutes and more than an hour glued to the phone. Knowing each other. The length of appointments "depends on whether or not there is a spark between the two people." Then both will choose whether to see each other and continue chatting.

Love is quarantine's goal is to offer everyone the opportunity to date regardless of their physical appearance. Adrián Montesano, psychologist and expert in family and couples therapy and professor at the Open University of Catalonia, points out that this proposal "forces to sharpen other senses that are not normally used": "A disadvantage that Tinder and other apps have is the window dressing . We become a showcase where physics and appearances prevail. ”

With a phone call, consider that you can connect differently and there are those who can surprise you. “You stop focusing on the physicist. Conversation, empathic ability or humor are going to be decisive when it comes to achieving a match ”, says Montesano, who also directs a master's degree in sexual and couples therapy at the University of Barcelona.

As soon as the appointments are over, the participants tell their experiences in videos published on Instagram. Derek and Kelsey, on theirs, have touched on many subjects. “We had a lot to talk about: about music, about how everything is now, how we are doing work and adapting to the situation… I have enjoyed the conversation. But I don't know if the connection has been deep enough to get to anything else, "says Kelsey, a 27-year-old from Tennessee who" often intimidates boys because of their tall stature. " Derek, 25, of New York, has no doubts. He wants to keep in touch with Kelsey. From the appointment, in addition, a recommendation is carried. "Kelsey has advised me to watch Tiger King on Netflix, he says he will change me as a person," he says.

On the other side of the screen, an entire army of fans follows the news of Love is quarantine day after day. They share their reactions both on Instagram and in the program's spreadsheet. "I need updates on Katie and Steve. Another date?" Says one user. He is not the only one who would like to know more. "Participants should be broadcasting live and having these conversations on the speaker phone," says another. This improvised experiment is more exciting for many than the prepared reality shows, as confirmed by a netizen: "All this shows that normal people are much more interesting than the wonderful program they broadcast on television."

After the appointments, some participants are lucky. “There are couples who are still talking. Unfortunately, they have to wait until the quarantine is over to meet in person. We hope that all matches can be held once it is safe to do so, ”says Lam. In fact, both roommates plan to celebrate the end of isolation with them. When it's all over, they'll throw a party with participants and fans in New York.

They have already been in quarantine for three weeks. They are perfectly, although quite busy with their new project. Both are single and open to discovering new people. “If we meet our wives while organizing Love is quarantine, it would be amazing. Who knows? ”Asks Nix. He is still trying to figure out "what exactly is that about love." For Lam, it's about feeling that someone knows you completely and believes that, like him, many other people in isolation are prepared to experience it: “People will always want love and company no matter where we are or what the world is going through. "

Confinement increases the use of 'apps' to link

The coronavirus has forced hundreds of weddings to be postponed worldwide, while divorces have skyrocketed in parts of China. "The problem is forced coexistence. So many hours together make the conflict take center stage and overshadow much of the relationship, "explains Montesano. For this same reason, "there is an upturn in separations and divorces in the summer or at Christmas." But the psychologist remembers that during 2021 there are also likely to be more births.

In fact, the desire to find the love of some people in quarantine has also increased. This is demonstrated by user activity in dating apps. During the first week of confinement in Spain, they spent up to 25% more time a day talking on Tinder. This trend is repeated in countries like the United States and Italy, according to the company. Montesano explains that "people who live alone may feel the need to have a special connection with someone": "Now they are at home and have more time to fill in". The biographies that users show in their profiles have also changed. Now they include messages like "stay home", "be safe", "wash your hands" or "how are you?".

Also, in the absence of any physical contact, some apps experiment with different functions. Tinder has offered the Passport function for free, which allows you to match people from anywhere in the world. Bumble allows you to make video calls or voice calls so that users can have virtual appointments. Other apps like Coffee Meets Bagel offer special remote dating ideas: watch a movie together with Netflix Party, visit an online museum with your partner, play video games or exchange recipes.

Source: elparis

All news articles on 2020-04-03

You may like

News/Politics 2024-02-08T14:32:47.020Z

Trends 24h

News/Politics 2024-03-28T06:04:53.137Z

Latest

© Communities 2019 - Privacy

The information on this site is from external sources that are not under our control.
The inclusion of any links does not necessarily imply a recommendation or endorse the views expressed within them.