The disconnection imposed on older people during the Corona period only sharpened what is already defined as a global phenomenon - loneliness • Rachel, 77, says: "I found being alone - it's not terrible, because I am surrounded by good people" • Overcoming loneliness - first article in the series • In collaboration Sheltered Housing Forum

• "I could not have asked for a better place than this." Rachel Sagi

In January 2018, news outlets around the world reported that British Prime Minister Theresa May had appointed a special minister to deal with the problem of loneliness. Some media have referred to the appointment as a curiosity, but two years later it is already clear that loneliness is a global phenomenon that requires proper attention, or as May herself herself defined it: "the sad reality of modern life."

According to the Central Bureau of Statistics, 29 percent of those aged 65 and over 65 in Israel feel lonely often or sometimes. Among those aged 75 and over, this is a wider rate of almost 40 percent. In the corona era the numbers just kept climbing, but even after the virus disappears (or is vaccinated), loneliness will remain the domain of millions around the world (in recent years the phenomenon also encompasses more and more young people who do not find their place in society).

"Loneliness is a bad disease, and some people call it one of the most difficult problems of old age," says Prof. Yitzhak Brick, chairman of the Israeli Association of Genetology (The Study of Aging). "We can not know the exact causes, but we know there are. Relationship between certain phenomena and loneliness. For example, those who live alone are at higher risk of experiencing loneliness, although a very important distinction needs to be made here - loneliness is not necessarily related to the situation in which the person is.

"Being alone is an objective reality, a given situation. But feeling lonely is a subjective phenomenon. A person can live in a relationship at home and feel lonely, a person can be in a lot and feel lonely. On the other hand you can live alone and not feel lonely but surrounded by friends who are in touch with you. It is the one that determines, and the distinction between alone and alone is important. "

According to Prof. Brick, there is a link between loneliness and illness: "People who feel lonely are sicker and symptoms like anxiety, worry, etc. appear along with this feeling. Loneliness has a devastating effect on an adult's life. Recently, in days of closure due to the coronavirus, there "Loneliness has a much greater weight. We know that as long as the isolation lasts, there is a functional and mental decline in the adults and therefore the risk of loneliness is much greater when a person is locked in his home for an extended period."

What can be done to deal with loneliness?

"It is very important to make sure that the person, who has the potential to experience loneliness, has a meaningful relationship with other people. To have people who care about him, people he cares about and who have real relationships with. Not a superficial relationship but a meaningful relationship, like with a good friend. "When you tell him something about you, he does not listen and goes on to talk about himself, but answers you with a question to better understand what you are going through. The word 'meaning' is the key word here. People who have significant connections will not usually feel lonely."

"I have an answer to every problem"

One who can testify from personal experience how important it is to be among friends is Rachel Sagi (77) who lives in "Protea in the Village" - sheltered housing in Moshav Bnei Dror. She and her late husband Yaakov lived in the Golan Heights, moved into sheltered housing together 16 years ago, and in 2015 he passed away, but she was not left alone.

More on this topic:

Exploitation of the Elderly in Corona: How to Deal?

The other blow of the corona: the forced loneliness fatally strikes the elderly public

Lifeguards: The legal aid system for the elderly

"I found good friends here," she says, "I found that being alone - which I was very afraid of - is not terrible, because I am surrounded by good people and do not feel lonely for a moment. I open a door - I have somewhere to go, if I want to be alone - No one bothers me.

"I know my friends who feel very lonely. I try to keep in touch with friends from the past, and I can say that some of them are very lonely. Here are some who come to my aid in any problem, but I know that for those who do not live in sheltered housing, if and when health issues arise "Someone who needs financial expenses for professionals can make it harder and more intense to feel lonely."

Rachel emphasizes that the fact that she feels safe and surrounded has a close connection to the fact that since she arrived in the sheltered housing until today she has not had any complaints about the conduct of the place and about the tenants with whom she lives.

"I could not have asked for a better place than this. Although I am alone but I am not lonely," she says, excitedly reading a poem she wrote about it in memory of her husband:

I respond, after his death / loneliness. is that so? Hiino this one Lzo Cl Cc Hrbh Snim, Abro strictly between Cl Hsdrim / Neither do except for Mlim, Btoc Cl Hisorim / Hiiti there Lmanc Cl Himim, Rtziti Lhamin Safsr, Smotr / Ac Notrti Lbd. I am not alone, I surround you - in every work, in every book, in every word I write / I fill you but I am not you. I'm alone / And you went - where?