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What am I doing here - and where do I want to go?
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Photo: andresr / Getty Images
Robert, 43, asks:
»I have worked in many different positions since my studies and have also been successful.
I make good money, but I still have the feeling that I haven't really arrived yet.
I want to finally find my calling and be happy at work, but I don't know what to look for.
How do I find out what my calling really is? "
Dear Robert,
Suppose you have found your calling, what would be different then?
What do you associate with the feeling of having arrived at work and why exactly is this so attractive for you?
Three questions to take time to answer.
Because in career counseling I experience many people looking for their calling and it is difficult for all of them to describe what exactly they associate with this goal.
Do not look any further for any calling, but first clarify for yourself what it means in concrete terms and why it is so important to you to find your calling.
The real motivation behind the calling
When I talk to people looking for their ultimate dream job, many of them want to be able to follow their dreams and goals more self-determinedly.
They want to do more that which corresponds to their strengths and what they burn with all their heart.
For them it is about passion, self-fulfillment, identification with an employer or products as well as experiencing personal meaning.
We all have different values that are important to us in our job.
How would you notice and what should be fulfilled in order to get into a job?
Write it down - as specifically as possible.
"Tschakka, the choice is yours"
You probably also know the reports about the ex-controller who is now a surf instructor in the South Seas. We often get the suggestion that it is actually very easy today to make your most colorful dreams come true. "You just have to want it, then you can do it too - Tschakka!" The sayings of such self-optimization gurus may be useful as a short-term motivational boost, but they have come back to reality from the little house to be paid for, the youngest at school as well as deep-seated beliefs and fear of change Do not take a normal employee a step further - let alone to a calling.
"Tschakka, the choice is yours" is, from my point of view, the more effective, if less sexy-sounding message.
It's about consciously assuming personal responsibility.
Anyone who hopes that the vocation will eventually fall at their feet and save them gives up responsibility and slips all the more deeply into frustration or even victimization.
From the job seeker to the life designer
In coaching I experience how much people, doggedly looking for a job, miss their own successes and beautiful moments in the here and now over the years.
They overlook what great things they have experienced and achieved in their careers.
It seems that all of this is worthless unless it is the calling.
Your own appreciation of your existing experience and your strengths is the most important prerequisite for change.
Only then can you look out for attractive positions and evaluate opportunities.
What do you find easy and enjoyable?
Are there any industries or products that you love?
What is your optimal day at work?
Are you more of a thinker, communicator, controller or creative artist?
Write it down.
Because only those who know themselves can shape their lives.
Curiosity about change instead of a call to the end of the line
Robert, you write that you have already worked in various professions and were successful there. Is it really attractive for you to find that one final calling as the final destination in your professional life? I wonder what if, by the age of 45, you should actually find your calling. Do you think that you will then continue to do this job until you retire?
My experience is that it is more about discovering the position that suits this time, depending on the phase of life. Instead of the big, unknown vocation, it is the many small adjusting screws that we as bosses of our lives can choose every day in order to change something in a positive way. I am sure that you know what you need to be motivated, happy and healthy in your career. What's stopping you from curiously taking the next step?
