They are prison guards, nurses, teachers, students.
Their names are Agnès, Sigrid, Françoise, Sonia.
Sometimes judged, stigmatized or even ignored by society, they fell in love with heavily sentenced prisoners.
For her first book, Marine Mazéas, a journalist specializing in justice and news items, delves into the daily lives of these women who live or have had a romantic relationship with a prisoner.
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In
The Beloved Murderer, Wives of Criminals and Thugs
, there are 8 of them telling their story.
Like Claudine, a Frenchwoman who corresponds with Ronnie, locked up on death row in the United States.
Or Françoise who, while living in a loveless marriage and taking care of the health of the prisoners, meets Claude, imprisoned in Fresnes for burglary.
Sonia, supervisor, who crossed paths with Nathanaël, imprisoned for murder.
All different stories, which reveal an extraordinary but very real life as a couple.
“What made these women switch?
What attracted them?” asked the journalist.
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Miss Figaro. – Why did you decide to write this book?
Marine Mazeas.
-
This is a subject that I had already covered in several articles and each time, these stories aroused the curiosity of readers.
They wanted to know how these relationships were formed?
What was it about these men that attracted these women?
I thought it would be interesting to develop the subject in more depth, but also to multiply the testimonies.
It also made it possible to have a more exhaustive idea of this type of situation.
How did your meetings with prisoners' wives go?
I had already interviewed several of them for my articles, most of them agreed to continue our collaboration in a book.
There were others that I didn't know, so we had to convince them.
These women, in general, testify little because they fear the judgment of society or those close to them.
If they agreed today to speak, it is also to change the way people look at them.
It's a risk taking since they expose themselves, but with the objective that we understand them better, that we put ourselves in their place and that we stop judging them.
Why did you choose to tell the story of women from different generations?
I wanted to offer readers women with very varied profiles, ages, cultures, professions or even encounters.
Each of them had a different job: Françoise was a nurse, Claudine was Ronnie's correspondent, each encounter in this book is unique.
This type of story can happen to a whole bunch of different women, at different times.
What brings these women together?
I think it's passion, love.
All have loved or still love their men passionately.
The second common point is courage.
Some might call it recklessness, but it still takes a hell of a lot of courage to live these stories.
In particular because these relationships are often ostracized, but also because they are difficult to live with.
The companions or husbands of these women are locked up, they cannot see them when they wish.
Often, you have to travel miles to visit them for just a few hours on weekends.
They are not free to do what they want and sometimes suffer humiliation from the guards.
Love in the parlor is not the most pleasant or the most romantic either.
And then there is the wait, because these men were sentenced to heavy sentences.
It takes a lot of patience to hope to have a relationship outside prison, which you don't know if it will work, because it's another dynamic.
Some might call it recklessness, but it still takes a hell of a lot of courage to live these stories.
Marine Mazeas
beyond crime
Some detainees were incarcerated for burglary, others for murder. How do these women react when they learn the reason for the condemnation of the man they fall in love with?
What may seem surprising is that they were all very understanding.
There was no major shock, no reaction of rejection or recoil at the announcement of the acts committed by the person they were meeting, even when they were very serious.
But there is also a context.
Agnès, for example, was a prison guard.
When she meets Gabriel, who murdered her ex-companion, she is already aware since she knows the criminal records of the prisoners she is monitoring.
In this environment, she is surrounded by criminals: finally, it is a bit her norm.
In addition to that, the prisoner explains to him that there was deception and that he saw red, it was bloodshed.
For every story, there is a context.
They saw beyond the acts of these men.
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The beloved murderer, wives of criminals and thugs
of Marine Mazéas.
Press office
Is this also why you decided not to expand on the reasons for convictions in your book?
Talking about them was not really the subject of the book, even if it is necessary to approach them because it is important to know it, to understand the psychology of these women, why they have developed these feelings.
But they didn't fall in love with these men because they had committed crimes.
That's not what attracts them to them.
stronger than reason
Laure and Christo are part of the 8 couples present in your book. What is their story ?
Laure was a prison guard and she met Christo who was a high-flying robber, sentenced to 15 years in prison for 12 violent robberies.
Between them, all it took was one look for it to be love at first sight.
At that time, the reason does not exist because romantic feelings predominate.
Laure has not at all mastered this attraction for him.
Very quickly, she is caught up and completely overwhelmed by this story.
She allows herself to maintain a relationship with him, hiding from her colleagues since it is completely prohibited in detention.
This story began to take on proportions she hadn't imagined, because the only thing Christo wanted was to escape.
He managed to convince her to help him and she also involved her son in this plan.
But all three were discovered just before the escape attempt.
Christo was transferred to another prison.
Laure was suspended, arrested and put on trial.
This had terrible consequences on her professional life, on her life as a woman and a mother, even if she tells me that her son has forgiven her.
It was a very bitter conclusion, especially since she hoped to be able to continue this relationship despite this failed attempt.
But Christo did not follow up.
It marked her a lot and she is still affected by it, even years later.
She wants to move on, while hoping that the look changes on the wives of criminals or prisoners.
She explains that despite this terrible conclusion, she lived an extraordinary adventure and that there are beautiful stories in prison.
The reason does not have to be because the feelings of love predominate
Marine Mazeas
Sigrid is one of those women who began to correspond by letter with an American prisoner. How did they fall in love?
At the time, Sigrid was a young French girl studying in Copenhagen.
She has always been shocked by the death penalty system in the United States: since the age of 18, she has corresponded with a death row inmate in his fifties.
At 24, she decides to change correspondent for a younger person and comes across an advertisement on the Internet, that of Alan.
Sentenced to death at a very young age, he kidnapped and buried a retired couple alive to obtain their bank card codes, with the help of three accomplices.
Sigrid is not judgmental at all, her objective is to be empathetic and she does not understand the concept of condemnation: deciding on the death of a person, a programmed death.
They exchange many letters and very quickly,
Alan becomes a very important confidant.
She falls in love with him, which she hadn't expected at all.
At the beginning, she is restrained: she is afraid of the judgment of others and for her it is not a life to be in a relationship with a death row inmate.
But from their first meeting, feelings prevail over reason.
Sigrid will agree to establish a relationship with Alan and she ends up settling in the United States, to be able to see him more regularly.
Today they had a baby boy.
And Alan's sentence was commuted to life in prison last June.
But from their first meeting, feelings prevail over reason.
Sigrid will agree to establish a relationship with Alan and she ends up settling in the United States, to be able to see him more regularly.
Today they had a baby boy.
And Alan's sentence was commuted to life in prison last June.
But from their first meeting, feelings prevail over reason.
Sigrid will agree to establish a relationship with Alan and she ends up settling in the United States, to be able to see him more regularly.
Today they had a baby boy.
And Alan's sentence was commuted to life in prison last June.
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Marine Mazeas darownson
However, they had enormous difficulties with the prison administration, which prevented them from seeing each other. Their relationship might not have lasted.
To date, they have hardly seen each other for over a year as visits have been interrupted for Sigrid due to the birth of this child.
Everyone is also wondering how it was designed, the prison administration first: when you are sentenced to death in the United States, you have very little physical contact with your loved ones in general (
in the book, the young woman did not wish to comment on the conception of her child; she simply affirmed that legally, on the birth certificate, Alan was indeed the father, Editor's note
).
In June, Sigrid and Alan saw each other again, they were allowed to have a visit.
Today, she hopes that the visits will be restored soon: as he was sentenced to another sentence, he will be transferred to another prison.
When you are in a relationship with a detained person, your rights are quite minimal
Marine Mazeas
Obstacles
In the midst of these love stories, you also point out the dysfunctions of the prison system, in France or in the United States. What should be remembered?
When you are in a relationship with a detained person, your rights are quite minimal.
These women have the right to two or three hours of visiting according to the possibilities and certain visiting rooms are more intimate than others.
Sometimes they are simple walls that are not occulting, you can hear everything: it is difficult to have privacy in these conditions and it is no longer so authorized by the regulations of the prison administration.
In some establishments, there are what are called UVFs, Family Life Units, which allow you to spend a few hours with your partner.
We can get together as a family 24 or 48 hours.
When you don't have these UVFs, it's complicated to maintain a couple with only a few hours of conversation per week.
The prison system
Is this where the associations of prisoners' wives come in, to allow these relationships to be experienced more easily?
There are many who offer logistical support: when these women go to see their partner or their husband in prison, it is not always close to home.
They must be housed or even pay for the journeys: the associations take care of that.
There is also mutual aid, understanding, psychological support that is provided to them in difficult times.
Today, some detainees are still incarcerated or on death row, others have been released. How has the situation of these couples evolved?
I am still in contact with the wives of prisoners and we saw each other very recently in relation to the release of the book.
Most of them are fine.
Sigrid is very happy with this new judgment concerning Alan: the future, which was all the same rather obscure, lights up a little for her.
Claudine, who met Ronnie, a death row inmate, by mail, plans to settle near him in the United States, so she is eager to leave.
Françoise, who met Claude in 1973, is now a widow.
But she is happy to participate in this book to pay tribute to her husband, with whom she had a wonderful story.
Laura tries to move on.
Overall, these stories endure and there are no regrets, even for those that ended badly.
None of
(1) The beloved murderer, wives of criminals and thugs
by Marine Mazéas, editions of the Rock, 256p., €18.90, released on October 5, 2022.
