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Christmas was not celebrated in our home, except for one time. I had urged my mother to prepare a festive Christmas dinner and to give me my Christmas present - a book every year - not already in the shop, but exceptionally nicely packed on Christmas Eve. It couldn't be that difficult to re-enact Christmas.
My mother went to the health food store and ordered a Christmas goose from the organic farm called Gisela. On the 24th she picked up the poultry and prepared it to the best of her knowledge and belief: Gisela was stuffed with onions, garlic and parsley and seasoned with cumin. In other words, it tasted like everything my mother served. Mom didn't pack the book. She thought it was silly that the packaging waste was unnecessary, I knew what was inside.
Many migrant children can tell such a story of the failed attempt to celebrate Christmas à la Almans. A colleague reported how frustrating it was when he urged his Iranian parents to celebrate Christmas. They were completely overwhelmed by the foreign customs. How does the correct order go: Eating before or after giving presents? Ever: what to cook? What to give The gifts under the Christmas tree or on the table? Hundreds of decisions without knowing how to do it. No trace of contemplation.
Our impulse to celebrate Christmas was logical. Not only upright Christians sing "Silent Night, Holy Night", atheists, opponents of the church and even Communists also put expensive gifts under a decorated tree and warbler. The so-called December dilemma is mentioned in interreligious families. This is why some Jews celebrate "Christmas", a Christmas-inspired Hanukkah, the Jewish Festival of Lights, which overlaps with the Advent season. Why shouldn't we celebrate "Weihram", a Bayram with a tree and gifts? That would only be fair.
At our Bayrams ("celebrations" in Turkish) there are no gifts. At the Sugar Festival or Victim Festival you felt like kissing the hand of a million distant relatives and other guests and you received a small allowance for it. That meant a lot of hard work for a handful of euros, while at Christmas the buddies just got a CD player, a bike or the latest toys.
Asylum under the Christmas tree
On the other hand, it is of course practical that not everyone in Germany celebrates Christmas. Somebody has to keep the store going when everyone withdraws into their Christmas cocoon between December 24 and New Year's Eve. Operation must work in hospitals, public transport or power plants. This is often done by non-Christian migrants or their descendants, who make it big this time of year. Seen in this way, they also do their part for German Christmas.
For those who don't celebrate or work, the holidays mean yawning boredom. Because the Christmas Eve collective pulls everyone else into its Silent Night number. Try doing something in a smaller town on the 24th as a teenager. This is practically impossible. The most I could get in Franconia for me as a teenager on Christmas Eve was sweet and sour duck from the Chinese at the main train station. Otherwise nothing was open. For me, Christmas tasted Chinese for years.
So, whenever possible, I had myself invited to friends on Christmas Eve. I was often the famous guest who was not part of the family but was still allowed to be there. I got asylum under the tree. As a Christmas nomad, I now know a lot about German Christmas customs. I have become a Christmas Eve researcher over the years.
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I was fascinated by the Christmas packaging and kitchen battles and learned to love them. Just as every family in India has its own curry recipe, in Germany every family apparently has its own Christmas ritual. This is probably due to the fact that everyone first celebrates with the parents and then introduces the tradition to their new family - combined with that of the partner. I introduced the baked apple to my family that my primary school friend Miriam used to have. Before we eat chicken soup, anchovy rolls and a good roast with a festive side dish.
That's why I don't understand that every year during the Advent season, the festival is equated with drama and family chaos in countless films and interviews with psychologists. I cannot confirm this from my nomadic years. Most of the parties were just beautiful. The secret weapon for contemplative Christmas was probably universal and can be found at all family celebrations in all religions: heavy food and a lot of it. Because those who digest are busy.
In this sense: happy digestion!