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The "Ion": Really a Revolution for Male Orgasm?
Photo: Benjamin Maack / DER SPIEGEL
When I get to the office, there is a white package on my desk.
»In neutral packaging«, as they say in sex accessories shipping jargon.
I open it.
In a nest of gray-black filler accordions lies a cardboard box with a picture of a device on it.
Very technical, a mixture of bluetooth speaker and mega-futuristic hairdryer charger.
"Arcwave" is on the box, "Newgasm" is on the brochure that comes with it.
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Stars in your head: The brochure on "Neugasmus".
Photo: Benjamin Maack / DER SPIEGEL
I open the box and two things appear in front of me.
Both look like too big, way too complicated pencil sharpeners and something with "Star Wars".
One is the charging station, the other is the "Stroker with pleasure air".
On the one hand hard plastic, on the other a rubber that feels a little creepy and half-alive.
"Shit," it runs through my head, "you don't need lubricant for something like that?" I rummage through the box and find a tube.
"Super slippery, long lasting".
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Complicated pencil sharpeners: the »Ion« and its charging station
Photo: Benjamin Maack / DER SPIEGEL
I write a text message to my wife: "The dickinator is here." I hit "send" and wonder if I might not take the topic seriously enough to get it far as a sex toy tester.
Then I realize that out of sheer alien fascination I have forgotten to take off my jacket.
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