“The impression of being in a spiral, without being able to get out of it”: this is how Virginie, a 48-year-old nursing assistant in an nursing home, recounts her burn-out which led her to push the doors of the Le Gouz clinic in Louhans (Saône-et-Loire), an establishment specializing in the burn-out of health personnel.
Exhausted by the lack of resources, staff and the “marathon days”, Virginie wanted to hold out.
But she ended up cracking up with the Covid-19 health crisis.
All she remembers is her 19-year-old daughter called the fire department one day after finding her completely paralyzed at home.
" I do not know what happened.
Seems that I have done dangerous things for myself and for others, ”says Virginie.
Taken to psychiatric emergencies, the forty-year-old accepts at first with difficulty to seek treatment.
She finally resigns herself to joining this clinic which presents itself as the only one in France exclusively dedicated to caregiver burnout.
Virginie therefore put an end to long months of denial, which almost cost her her life.
“I was in shambles back then,” she says.
For months already, professional exhaustion had crept in insidiously.
“There were always new requirements.
We were even asked more if we wanted to come back to work when we were off duty.
It was: We must ”.
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“We left work at night wondering which Covid patient was going to leave first.
The resident died, we packed him up and it was over.
It was violent, ”she recalls.
She even says she saw nine deaths in two days ... Exhausted, frustrated at not being able to do a job she loves properly, she then leads a life "unlike anything".
“I didn't wash anymore.
I didn't go out anymore.
I no longer did the housework, ”she breathes.
In the morning, Virginie swallows tramadol (an opioid), in the evening, vodka or whiskey… She does not dare to ask for help.
“We are ashamed.
A sick leave, it made me feel very guilty.
I gave my colleagues an overload of work and I could no longer help the patients ”.
In the Le Gouz clinic, the establishment's psychiatrist, Agnès Oelsner, regularly sees caregivers who are unable to admit that they must know how to stop in order to preserve themselves.
“The caregivers push to the limits, like this general practitioner who cannot say no to a patient when it is 9 pm or this nurse who remains, after his hours, to help his replacement”, lists the doctor.
“50% of general practitioners have or have had a burnout against 7% of the population.
For nursing assistants, it is a third.
Even before the Covid!
», She underlines again.