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Christoph Metzelder in the Düsseldorf District Court: "I would like to ask you for forgiveness on behalf of the victims of sexual violence here in this room."
Photo: Federico Gambarini / dpa
The process takes just under four hours, when Christoph Metzelder takes off his black mask, sorts the handwritten notes in front of him and makes a confession.
He found himself in "a digital parallel world," he says.
His voice breaks at the word "guilt".
“In addition to the criminal law,” said Metzelder, “this is about a moral guilt.” He is aware that there is a crime behind every one of his acts: “I want you to be forgiven in this room on behalf of the victims of sexual violence ask. ”Then he cries.
The old life of the former national soccer player Christoph Metzelder, 40, has been over since the beginning of September 2019.
At that time, investigators drove to the Hennef sports school near Bonn, where he was just completing a coaching course.
They took his cell phone and searched his house in Düsseldorf and his office.
Since then, there has been a tremendous suspicion: Metzelder, the model athlete who had campaigned for disadvantaged students for many years, is said to have owned and passed on child and youth pornographic material.
On Thursday he had to answer to the Düsseldorf District Court.
The verdict in the end: a prison sentence of ten months, suspended on probation.
At first he seems almost self-confident
At first, Metzelder seems composed on this day, almost self-confident.
He comes into the room a few minutes before the start of the trial, greets his defense attorney, fist against fist.
Metzelder sits down, his every movement is captured by the photographer.
When the judge comes into the room, he gets up and buttons his gray jacket.
It quickly becomes clear that he is ready to admit mistakes today.
Around 600 days passed during which he publicly remained silent about the allegations.
Shortly after the start of the process, he took the floor: "I will speak out now," says Metzelder.
In his first statement, he speaks of his football career, the sports marketing agency he later founded, and his foundation.
He talks about the awards he has received for his voluntary work.
He was "proud" of it, says Metzelder.
But he now wants to return the Order of Merit of the State and the Federal Cross of Merit on ribbon, regardless of the outcome of the process.
The honors, he says, would make "a claim to the holder of the medal", "which is also directed into the future."
He is obviously of the opinion that he has not lived up to this claim.
He also reports what his new life looks like: "The search was a turning point, both professionally and privately," he says, "I've been living in seclusion since then."
It's about 297 files
When the public prosecutor Kathrin Radtke reads out the indictment, Metzelder looks in the face for almost 30 minutes.
It's about 297 files with child and youth pornographic content that investigators are said to have found on his cell phone.
Metzelder is said to have sent three women such files via WhatsApp, a total of 27 pictures and two videos.
Prosecutor Radtke describes some of the pictures in detail: They see "partially or completely undressed young people" younger than 14 years.
One picture shows a girl, younger than 10 years, who has oral sex.
Another one shows "a toddler" whose "legs are being pushed apart".
Metzelder takes notes while Radtke reads aloud.
Then his defender, Ulrich Sommer, speaks out.
The legislature thinks that it can improve the protection of children by criminalizing the handling of the images described, says Sommer.
It sounds like he doesn't think much of it.
The public is "not trained" in dealing with this form of punishment, says the defense attorney.
Laypeople would describe the images in question as "terrible or offensive".
The criminal code is not about objection.
Criminal law protects legal interests, not feelings.
He, Sommer, assumes that this claim will be satisfied in court.
His remarks are an appeal to look at the allegations more soberly and less moralizing.
The prosecutor doesn't want a deal
It is noteworthy that Metzelder's defense attorney appears to want to tell the court how to do its job.
It still seems that Metzelder and his lawyers assume that they have room for maneuver.
At 10 a.m. judge Astrid Stammerjohann takes a break.
There is a legal discussion between all sides, it takes two and a half hours, but the public prosecutor does not want an understanding.
So it goes on.
"Should an admission be made?" Asks Judge Stammerjohann.
Defense attorney Sommer nods, then Metzelder speaks his confession into a black microphone: Yes, he found incriminated images on freely accessible websites and then sent them, he says.
Metzelder talks about exchanging "extreme fantasies" in chats.
There is not much left of the self-assured demeanor at this point.
Metzelder chooses questionable formulations, speaks of the "fascination of the unspeakable", of the "charm of crossing borders".
But what exactly should be fascinating about pictures of abused children?
Where is the attraction?
He doesn't say anything about that.
He confesses to having obtained and passed on 18 files.
Some he allegedly sent twice.
He was not on the road in relevant forums or on the Darknet.
There were no attacks on children, and nothing like that was planned.
Listeners and journalists have to leave the hall
Metzelder speaks a lot about himself in his confession, hardly about the children who were shown in the pictures and in the videos.
He knows he's leaving a wound that may never heal, he says.
He will have to cope with that "for the rest of my life."
In the courtroom, the pictures are shown and the chat histories are read.
The audience and journalists have to leave the hall for a moment.
Before Stammerjohann closes the taking of evidence, Heiko Klatt, Metzelder's media lawyer, comments.
In the past few months, articles in the press have violated his client's personal rights.
Klatt speaks of a "medieval witch hunt", Metzelder was prejudiced by the media.
That, says Klatt, should be taken into account by the court, reducing the amount of punishment.
Stammerjohann goes into this later in her judgment.
Metzelder has to accept a public interest, that is the downside of his fame, she says.
On the other hand, they also recognize "an anticipated punishment".
In addition, Metzelder is already doing therapy.
"And he showed real remorse," says the judge.
She sentenced Metzelder to ten months probation because he gave another person possession of child pornography in 26 cases and because he himself owned child pornography.
There are no instructions or financial requirements for Metzelder.
Judge Stammerjohann added that the proceedings would "serve as a warning". After seven hours, Metzelder leaves the hall with his hands buried deep in his trouser pockets. He walks past dozens of cameras and reporters, he doesn't want to comment on the verdict.