Bachelorette Maxime toasts with candidate Zico
If the season of »Bachelorette«, which has just ended, would not be a harmless TV format, but a secret re-education program with which DIE DA OBEN want to put an end to the heteronormative couple being forever by making the man-woman relationship and its initiation so blunt , idiot and thoroughly horrible to show that no one who is halfway at consolation would ever again enter into such a cruel relationship after watching this infiltration whacking, whereupon the reproduction rate and thus also the population figures would finally be significantly reduced, which is what THE ABOVE THAT, of course Have been working for a long time anyway, which sounds completely plausible to people who regularly shudder through Telegram - so if all this were given, this year's edition of the »Bachelorette« would be a strategic masterpiece,to which one would have to bow silently as low as the creaking bones give.
If none of that applies, however, this season is a real Trash TV low point.
And a good time to think about leaving this bachelorette bullshit.
And maybe also the "Bachelor" nonsense.
The beginning is the end. “Princess Charming”, the first lesbian dating format, had just shown on TVNOW how heartwarming and actually empowering trash TV, even a dating format, can be if you carefully choose your protagonists and allow them to be natural and undisguised. In the first few minutes of the opening sequence, Bachelorette Maxime rolled happily on the fruit-filled loading area of an orange transporter and danced happily around a lantern, all as realistic as in a tampon advertisement, the leak-proof protagonist of which then cheekily steals a waiter's drink from the tray as she walks by.
The cinematic slow-motion camera rides that were first seen in the trash genre in the previous "Bachelor" season, where they still looked surprisingly modern, were so overly incorrectly dosed in the "Bachelorette" that they almost seemed parodistic - for example when Maxime's hand through the rapeseed field like Russell Crowe's extremity in the opening scene of "Gladiator" stroked through the golden wheat.
Everything, really everything, that followed was bad: the candidates who raised the usual sobriety to a new level - Dario, for example, the influencer who spoke obtrusively old-fashioned about "the editorial staff" and "the director", his planned performance Seemed to have been really disgustingly kitschy himself scripted, had camera-effective, deeply meant self-talk and drove Maxime over on the first date with a meaningful gift and then with intrusive graves. "Too bad too quickly," to say it in the style of "Bachelorette" veteran Ioannis. Unfortunately, Maxime endured it in silence, strapped to a sofa hanging from a crane.
Or Julian, the flip-up polo collar made man, for whom neither maxim nor the eternal pool lounging in the men's villa were good enough, and who said completely seriously about himself: “This is not me. If my hair is the way it has been for the past few days - that's how I would never present myself. «You don't want to know where you can find such protagonists.
And actually also not why one offers such stressful men a stage who seem to care about nothing but themselves. And whose image of women is so bizarrely ragged that Julian, again completely serious, after a dinner date with Maxime could not believe what she had just eaten without hesitation: "That she is not too bad, that she takes this burger in her hand with her little hands and bites into it!" Women who eat burger, it really gets bigger and bigger.
What's next, maybe they'll be able to vote soon?
"Even if the bachelorette and their candidates really had the chance to get to know each other, it was bogged down in empty clichés."
Unfortunately, the maxim, you have to put it so roughly, is a total failure as a Bachelorette.
That sounds nasty, of course, but at least she knew exactly what she was getting into: In 2018 she was a candidate for the "Bachelor", but left voluntarily, was then longer with the winner of a "Bachelorette" season, whose relationship to his The season bachelorette broke up a few months after the finale and is now with another candidate on her season who was previously with a "Bachelor" candidate who gave her bachelor a juicy slap when she was kicked out , by the way in the same season as Maxime, and so everything finally falls into place again.
How well can you get to know someone at a beekeeper in a protective suit?
Maxime knows the business in the bachelor verse, you cannot accuse her of naivety. But her internalized female compulsion to smile, with which she soothes away unpleasant moments and keeps silent, and her very often submissive attitude towards the candidates. When Julian, who she apparently liked, presented himself to be extremely silly as hard to get on a night of roses, she consequently didn't throw him upright, but instead drove to the villa the next day to purr around him. The person making the selection has to beg the person to be selected to really be selected, this unfounded humility makes you mad when you watch.
"I want to find out who is really interested", Maxime explains her action, but unfortunately nothing dawns on her even when Julian looks at her at the Night of the Roses, in her own words, with "a mixture of pissed off, bored and annoyed" . "What exactly do you want from me?" Asks Julian during Maxime's follow-up visit. "I don't always want to doubt whether you will accept the rose or not," says Maxime, followed by an uncomfortable stare and grin. "Okay," says Julian, "do you still play cards?"
The dates, seldom dreamer than this year, didn't help either. How well can you get to know someone at a beekeeper in a protective suit? Why is Maxime being dragged across the sea at top speed in a rubber sofa with six men, only the sixth having to paddle alongside on a stand-up board due to lack of space? How are men supposed to write a love letter to a woman they don't even know? The result was sentences like "As I can see, you are in your prime and shine like a diamond" - one wistfully remembers the blunt vaginal conversations at "Princess Charming".
But even if the Bachelorette and their candidates really had the chance to get to know each other better, that was bogus in empty clichés. While eating cake, Raphael asked Maxime which three words would best describe her. She actually claimed she was "creative" (among other things) and recycled his question a few hours later on her next date with Max.
Whoever won in the end was never more careless. "I don't know what to say," says the chosen one. Unsurprisingly, the follow-up broadcast afterwards hinted at some pennäler-like skirmishes that probably took place after the filming, something with a possibly existing love letter, embarrassingly told by Julian, and one is almost glad that none of this is investigated in more detail. Moderator Frauke Ludowig does it like the North American Virginia opossum in awkward situations and plays dead, which is understandable but not very effective. Maybe you should really take an example from her and just let the format go. "The Bachelorette" is over, thank you, over.