again? This is how you will deal with the children's second absorption crisis - Walla! health

2021-09-29T01:47:45.090Z

Every parent is familiar with the absorption difficulties most children have at entering a new kindergarten or class. A parent counselor gives advice on how to survive the second absorption in peace and fun for both parties

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again?
This is how you will deal with the children's second absorption crisis

Every parent is familiar with the absorption difficulties most children have at entering a new kindergarten or class.

This year, following the corona and the holidays that preceded and were a kind of continuation of August, it seems that the adjustment will be more complex.

A parent counselor explains how to survive the second absorption in peace and fun for both parties

Just before the absorption in the kindergartens: 5 parent counselors with the one tip that helped them the most

To the full article

Think about it for a moment, so far during the holidays the children have spent most of the day with you, whether at home or in experiential and fun attractions.

And suddenly without a period of grace, all of a sudden there is a return to school, suddenly we have to say goodbye and everyone goes to work, a kind of parting and leaving "paradise" for the children.

You have to say goodbye and everyone goes about their business.

Parents accompany their children to kindergarten (Photo: Reuven Castro)

Even if you passed the beginning of the school year with relative success, it seems that the first, second and maybe even the third parting was not easy for both you and your child.

Many tears were shed, many hearts were crushed and the conscience worked overtime.

It will not be different now back to the second routine.

It is important that you be awake and prepared for the difficulty that may arise following this repeated separation, and do not assume that the framework is already familiar to your child and they have already adapted.

Remember that during the holidays there was no sequence of days in the frames, and suddenly after the Tishrei holidays they will have to go to the frame continuously - meaning each day they will have to say goodbye to Dad and Mom for a longer period, and there is no freedom in the middle to ease the longing.

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Your starting point should be that after the holidays there will probably be a readjustment to the framework, and the re-separation will be not easy, and maybe even more difficult, for the child.

The memory of the previous parting is still fresh and unpleasant, so the fear of going through it again may lead them to a position of refusal - 'I have already experienced the parting, I managed to go through it once and I do not want to again'.

Several ways to make it easier for your child when returning to frames

1. Prepare them in advance for returning to kindergarten or school.

The term is very important, because none of us like to be surprised by a breakup.

Talk to them a few days before and remind them that soon everyone is back to their frame, during the conversation they raised positive connotations about the frame they are in.

These connotations can be related to games, friends, kindergartener and / or teacher and the things they enjoyed doing with them.

The goal is to recall the fun sides of the frame, and to link this positive memory to the fact that we are soon going to break up.

2. Make room for difficulty and sadness

, these feelings are legitimate and

appropriate

Talk to them about how they feel and ask them to share with you their concerns, maybe you will discover new things about them and their experience and together you can think about what can alleviate them.

It's really okay to be sad.

Mother comforting child (Photo: ShutterStock)

3. Share your feelings with them

. Sentences like "I will miss you too" create a shared experience that contributes to a sense of belonging and prevents a sense of loneliness. It is important for children to know that their parents will also miss them when they are not together. If necessary, think of a small object, a kind of transitory object, that they can put in a bag and take it with them, so that if the longing is too strong they can access it and comfort it.

4. It is important not to pull the parting too long.

The longer you say goodbye, the harder it will be for them and you. Give a hug and a kiss, and remind them that at noon you will meet again, set up a fun joint activity and say goodbye. When you, the parents, radiate confidence and see that you trust the professional who receives your child at the entrance to the frame, your child will also feel this and the separation will gradually become easier.

Separations are not a simple thing, but they are a developmental and integral part of our lives and we learn to grow and grow from each of them.

Yael Schneiderman, CBT Psychotherapy Parental guidance, counseling and care for children and youth

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Source: walla

All life articles on 2021-09-29

again? This is how you will deal with the children's second absorption crisis - Walla! health

again?
This is how you will deal with the children's second absorption crisis

More on Walla!

Just before the absorption in the kindergartens: 5 parent counselors with the one tip that helped them the most

More on Walla!

Several ways to make it easier for your child when returning to frames

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