Singer Billie Eilish has 11 billion views on YouTube, 47 million monthly listeners on Spotify, 44 million subscribers on TikTok and 103 million on Instagram.
All at just 20 years old.
But the crown is fragile, as she tells in an interview with the
Sunday Times
on Sunday June 19, 2022. The twenty-something talks about the price of fame, the impact of over-mediatization, her identity crisis and the difficulties to show in public this body which she "has hated" since childhood.
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On video: Billie Eilish, "No Time To Die"
Loose clothes with a pink corset
When Billie Eilish breaks into the middle, at just 13 years old, it is not only her angelic voice that stands out but also her very punk look.
Only, behind her loose clothes and her fluorescent green coloring, the young woman, who suffers from Gilles de la Tourette syndrome, tells of her fear of judgment and her insecurity vis-à-vis her body.
The latter is also the cause of a series of depressions.
In an attempt to free herself from her mental prison and the labels that drive her “crazy”, the young woman decides to take the bull by the horns and appears in a pink pin-up corset in May 2021, on the cover of
Vogue UK
.
"It's the most punk thing I've done," she told The
Sunday Times
.
In six minutes, the photo becomes the fastest Instagram post to reach one million likes.
Unfortunately, praise also gives way to criticism.
“Wearing baggy clothes, no one is attracted to me, I feel unloved, not really sexy or beautiful.
People then shame you for not being “feminine” enough.
Then you're wearing something more revealing and they're like, 'You're a fat cow, a bitch, a sellout, and I'm like all the other celebrities who sell their bodies.'
And to conclude: “What the hell do you want?
It's a crazy world for women."
Silencing impostor syndrome
With hindsight, the singer considers that this sartorial quest was the way to silence her impostor syndrome.
"I was pretending to be a celebrity," she admits.
I was trying to convince myself that I deserved it (…) I needed to look a certain way for all this to make sense.
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Today, her hair is dyed black, pulled up into a messy bun.
During the
Sunday Times
interview , Elle wears a faded band t-shirt and black tracksuit bottoms.
The twenty-something has not been reconciled with her body but has chosen to opt for a less conflicting and above all more frank relationship.
“I like that my body belongs to me and that it accompanies me wherever I go, she summarizes.
I kind of consider my body my friend, my naughty friend.”
