A family member of mine has Alzheimer's.
What now?
Caring for a sick family member is always difficult, but it is doubly difficult when it comes to an illness that changes the personality of the loved one we knew.
An attorney specializing in dementia with several tools to help you in dealing with this
Vicky Nanny
09/29/2022
Thursday, September 29, 2022, 08:49
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Dr. Noa Bergman explains what causes Alzheimer's, is there a way to prevent the disease, and how to treat someone who is already ill (Walla system!)
Family members of dementia and Alzheimer's patients face an unimaginably difficult reality, one in which they find themselves at the center of intensive therapeutic efforts 24 hours a day.
Dealing with the treatment of a relative suffering from dementia often causes the entire family to change the course of their lives, when the therapeutic burden is placed mostly on the shoulders of the close family members.
Alzheimer's disease often changes the personality and behavior of the loved one as we knew it.
Although it is difficult, and abrasive at times, our behavior towards him should be understanding and inclusive.
Such behavior is the one that will also help the person we are treating, and will change, to some extent, our feelings during the treatment.
Here are some tools that will help you in this complex confrontation:
1. Try not to react critically
: elderly people with dementia are neither crazy nor lazy.
They say normal things and do normal things for dementia patients.
If they did or said things with the intention of annoying you, they probably had a different diagnosis.
You cannot control the disease, but only your reaction.
A woman takes care of a sick husband (Photo: ShutterStock)
2. Some things cannot be changed:
the reality of dementia patients is now different from yours, and you cannot change it.
You cannot control the disease.
You can only control your reaction to it.
3. Their "disability" is memory loss:
they cannot remember, and cannot remember that they cannot remember.
They will ask the same question over and over, believing it is the first time they are asking.
4. They don't hide things:
they just protect things by hiding them in a safe place.
Sometimes they do it out of anxiety, sometimes out of boredom, sometimes out of a sense of loss, memories of the distant past.
Don't take accusations of "theft" personally.
Conduct an observation and try to learn where the person hides his belongings in advance.
This will prevent panic attacks and false accusations.
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5. They are afraid:
Elderly people suffering from dementia experience many losses during the development of the disease.
We all feel anxious when something gets lost and we can't find it for a long time.
This is the daily experience of dementia patients.
They are anxious most of the time and each patient expresses their anxiety differently.
Some may be passive, uncooperative, hostile, angry, agitated, swearing, or physically violent.
They may even combine all of these behaviors at different times.
Anxiety may even force them to follow you everywhere.
You should contact your doctor and consult with him regarding the appropriate drug treatment.
6. Get your full attention
: When you try to talk to an elderly person suffering from dementia, try to neutralize the environmental "noises" - turn off the TV and radio, close the door, etc.
Before you start talking, call the elderly person's name, remind him who you are (even if they are close family members).
Sit or stand so that the patient can see you easily and not behind his back, maintain eye contact.
listen, understand, love.
A hand holding the hand of an adult Alzheimer's patient (Photo: ShutterStock)
7. They don't make up stories:
Dementia patients experience reality in a different and sometimes threatening way.
How not to react: not to cancel the feeling, not to correct the elderly person in anger, even if his statement sounds strange and even absurd to you.
How to respond?
Try to understand what is bothering the elderly, respond to his feelings in an empathetic way, calm and distract.
For example: an elderly person who expresses anxiety that someone is trying to steal his money, needs empathy and protection.
We will tell him that we completely understand how unpleasant and even scary it is when someone tries to steal from you, we will reassure him that we will make sure this does not happen and we will distract him by offering some activity, for example asking for help with light kitchen work.
8. How do you prevent an aggressive reaction?
Do not convince, do not argue, do not confront, do not criticize, do not remind the elderly with dementia that he forgets, and do not ask questions about the last few days - short-term memory is already damaged in the initial stages of the disease, and along with it, the ability to concentrate and learn.
We cannot "educate" an elderly person suffering from dementia, we can only go with the processes, both so as not to harm the elderly person himself and also to preserve our strength for this treatment.
9. Put yourself in his place for a moment:
try to hear through his ears, see through his eyes and feel through his heart.
Try to understand what he tried and failed to say.
If the elderly gets confused, help him find the words, offer him options for an answer, have an empathetic and inclusive conversation with him that will help him relax and continue the conversation.
10. Don't lose your sense of humor:
try to treat the situation with humor, even make a little fun of yourself.
Remind the elderly of a funny incident from the past, tell him a good joke and laugh along with him.
Laughter releases endorphins, the natural "happiness" hormones in the human body.
11. Get help:
day centers for the mentally ill operate throughout the country.
Check if there is one in your area of residence - this is a place where you can receive treatment and staying there will make it a little easier for the family as well.
A day center for the elderly is a community service designed for adults living at home and interested in joining a community-social framework that provides a variety of services.
Those entitled to nursing benefits from the National Insurance Institute can convert their entitlement to receiving personal nursing care services at home to care at a day center.
Elderly people who come to the day centers spend the day in varied activities pre-arranged in a program suitable for their age and health condition, thus enjoying company and care at the same time.
Vicky Nanny is a dementia specialist attorney, Matab association
health
the third age
Tags
Alzheimer's
dementia