Christmas can be the most beautiful time of the year, especially for children, an opportunity to see the family reunited and also hang out with friends and relatives, but for those who are alone or are going through a moment of discomfort, these are
the most difficult days
.
Ansa Lifestyle asked Monica Petra, president of Telefono Amico Italia that for the ninth consecutive year she keeps her listening and support services active throughout Christmas night and Boxing Day, a sort
of listening marathon
which engages almost 300 volunteers to emotionally support callers, and there are hundreds (in 2021, 26% more than the previous Christmas, 2020, and as much as 78% more than Christmas 2019, the last one before the pandemic) .
"Anyone who feels alone or in difficulty during the holidays can call or write to us: they will find the friendly voice of our volunteers, a lot of listening and the possibility of expressing their suffering without being judged", he said.
Here are questions and answers on the loneliness of holidays
1. Is there an increase in requests for help during the non-stop and in general during the holiday period?
In recent years we have recorded a constant increase in requests for help from our services, even during the holiday season when people experiencing a situation of suffering feel with particular intensity a disconnect between the joyful climate that the outside world offers and the emotions which they are living instead.
This difference can turn into the perception of a distance and foster feelings of
isolation and marginalization
that make one feel particularly alone, sad, that need to be listened to and welcomed in order to transform into awareness and self-knowledge.
2. Who calls?
What problems prompt you to look for yourself?
The majority of those who called us last year were men, almost 60%, over the age of 40.
Over a third of the contacts we received, a total of 37%, concerned problems related to solitude and the need for company, but the numbers relating to requests originating from relational or existential problems are also high, understood as questions regarding the meaning and sense of own life.
3. Telefono Amico Italia can be considered a historical observatory of the phenomenon of loneliness.
Can we try to make a historical excursus of how solitude has changed over time, especially that associated with the holiday season?
Has there been an increase in calls during this period in recent years?
Has the profile of the caller changed and how?
The problem of feeling lonely is a permanent and recurring theme.
2022 is proving to be a very difficult year from an emotional point of view, in fact, we have already received more than 90,000 requests for help since the beginning of the year.
Over the last decade, the loneliness that we are told about and which represents about a third of the contacts we receive, especially on the telephone, has gradually taken on
connotations that are less and less linked to the physical presence/absence of people and more and more often connected to the difficulty to find interlocutors.
In the last two years, during the lockdowns but also more generally due to the contraction of social relations following the pandemic, this specific characteristic seems to have emerged clearly in all age groups: very often, the feeling of loneliness arises from failing to receive attention and attention, from not feeling understood and welcomed, from not experiencing meaningful relationships.
During the holidays, as well as in summer or at Easter, in the period in which there seems to be a particular request for happiness from the outside, the absence of these contacts, the lack of relationships in which we feel we can express ourselves and be authentically ourselves weighs heavily more, and the feeling of "being alone" becomes cumbersome and requires a space where it can be expressed.
4. Christmas is traditionally the moment reserved for the family, which throws those who feel most alone into a crisis.
But even New Year's Eve, an occasion for parties and dinners, can put many people in crisis.
Are you experiencing differences in calls arriving on Christmas and New Year's Day?
In whose age does he call?
In the types of reports?
The entire holiday season is a time of attention to relationships, their absence or their insufficiencies.
In written services, especially the younger ones also more frequently propose relationship problems, both family and friendship or sentimental.
In this period we also receive many calls also linked to the theme of the existential perspective: over one call out of 10 comes from a person who wonders about the life path he is following, about the alternatives and the meaning of his own existence.
5. In this historical moment there is much talk of a youth crisis, of mental health that is shattered.
From your point of view, do you find an effective increase in emotional and psychological problems in younger people?
In the last two years
the requests received from the youngest have grown steadily, especially through chat and email
which are the services chosen most frequently by people under 30. Our data confirm what was also found by Istat, according to which in 2021 in Italy there are 220,000 young people between the ages of 14 and 19 who are dissatisfied with their lives and, at the same time, in a condition of
poor psychological well
-being .
However, these data also contain a positive signal: if on the one hand, in fact, the increased number of requests for help is an indication of the discomfort experienced by the younger generations in recent years, on the other,
their ability to ask for help and activate the resources available
in times of need they testify to the acquired competence of taking care of oneself, of listening to oneself.
It seems that the younger generations have a
greater awareness of their own needs
and know how to seek support to face moments of vulnerability and fragility.