He revealed that he had killed 25 “enemy combatants” during his missions in Afghanistan.
Prince Harry has indeed confided in his Memoirs, baptized
The Substitute
, published this Tuesday, January 10, on his experience as a helicopter pilot in combat zones.
"We shoot when necessary, take a life to save a life", explained the one who spent ten years in the British army, with two deployments in Afghanistan: in 2007-2008, then as "advanced air controller" in the south of the country, from September 2012 to January 2013.
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Naivete
These revelations caused an outcry, especially within the British army, annoyed by this great unpacking.
“It's filthy and naive stupidity on the part of Harry, of his publisher (…)”, thus estimated Major Chip Chapman, at the microphone of Times Radio.
However, few British tabloids have noted the passages in which the prince evokes his post-traumatic stress disorder, which occurred after his return from Afghanistan and was widely mentioned in his autobiography.
“I was bored to cry”
Cressida Bonas, his companion at the time, and his cousin Eugenie, would have been "shocked" to discover how much he had changed when he arrived in England.
"They told me I looked completely different," he wrote.
More stocky?
More massive?
Older ?
Yes, yes, all of that.
But not only.
Another thing too, that they couldn't define.
The husband of Meghan Markle thus describes the symptoms that he would have developed during the following weeks, which would have increased over the years.
“Every morning, I got up, I left for the base and I did my job, without taking any pleasure in it, he relates.
I couldn't find any sense in it.
I was bored.
To cry about it.”
At the time, King Charles III's younger son reportedly 'begged' his superiors to send him back to battle.
What they would have refused.
Prince Harry would have, moreover, experienced mixed feelings.
“On the one hand I was full of doubt and confusion – and on the other hand too, he recalls.
But what ?
Sadness ?
Torpor?”
Some time later, during his tour of the United States, Prince Harry encountered war wounded.
The latter confide in him that sport has been their therapy.
An exchange that gave him the idea of creating the Invictus Games, a competition for war veterans, wounded soldiers and people with disabilities.
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“More and more lost”
An initiative that would not have relieved his ills.
"I was expecting magic," he says.
I thought the daunting and noble task of creating international Warrior Games would launch me into a new phase of my life, the post-war phase.
That's not what happened.
On the contrary, I felt more and more apathetic.
More and more hopeless.
More and more lost.”
At the end of the summer of 2013, Prince Harry oscillated between "access of lethargy" and "terrifying anxiety attacks".
Hours before each public appearance, Archie and Lilibet's dad goes into "sweating fits" and, during the event itself, has "a mind clouded with fear and the urge to flee".
“The panic often started in the morning, when I put on a suit (…), explains the youngest of prince William.
As I buttoned up my shirt, I felt my blood pressure rise.
When it was time to tie my tie, my throat tightened.
When I got to the jacket and the laces of the shoes, my cheeks and back were sweaty."
A “kind of metamorphosis”
A fear which, according to him, would have “metastasized”.
“Soon, it was no longer just public appearances that triggered it, but all public places.
(…) I no longer had a choice: I started to stay at home.”
At this time, his friends no longer recognize him.
"Maybe that was what was happening," he suggests.
A kind of metamorphosis (…) and I would have no choice but to be this new person who was afraid of everything, for the rest of my life.
Prince Harry also recounts having “searched Google” in search of a diagnosis, when the answer “was before his eyes”.
“I had met loads of soldiers, loads of young men and young women who were suffering from post-traumatic stress.
(…) It had not crossed my mind that I too suffered from it.”
The Duke of Sussex would have gone in search of a remedy for his ailments, excluding however to take medication.
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A trek to the South Pole
He is also said to have expressed his anxieties to King Charles III.
"Towards the end of the meal, he lowered his head and said softly: 'It's probably my fault.
I should have gotten you the help you needed years ago.”
I assured him that he had nothing to do with it.
But I appreciated his apology.
As his 29th birthday approaches, Prince Harry has reportedly seen his anxiety “rise”.
He would then have decided to make a trek to the South Pole.
An experience that would have calmed him down.
Prince Harry nevertheless wishes to point out that "his war did not begin in Afghanistan", but indeed in August 1997, after the death of Lady Diana.
In May 2021, he revealed in the Oprah Winfrey-hosted documentary series,
The Me You Can't See
,
that
he had used EMDR, a special therapy, to deal with this trauma.