Madame Figaro
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At the moment, we tend to think that “hell is other people”…
Caroline Arditti.
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The largest study on happiness, orchestrated by Harvard, showed it well: the people most socially connected to their family, their friends, their colleagues, their community are the happiest, healthier and live longer.
Of course, we are not in the Noddy world.
There are hypertensive climates, toxic relationships, but we have the ability to twist them.
People are taught to breathe again.
We can also relearn how to relate to others.
We all have superpowers, nuggets to share.
I just treated myself to a bespoke neon sign, The Time is Now.
It's never too late and you're never too early.
Never too young and never too old...
Read alsoThe main principles of healthy selfishness, or how to prioritize yourself (without forgetting others)
In video: These foods that make you gain 10 years of life expectancy
How do you build quality friendships and relationships?
It is the work of a lifetime.
You just have to ask the right questions.
How do I feel after seeing this person?
Emptied or energized?
And when things go wrong, verbalize.
When we express what is on our hearts, we can switch back to the positive.
Similarly, do not hesitate to ask for help: in a world that celebrates autonomy, individualism, performance and success, we do not dare.
This deprives us of wonderful opportunities to strengthen our bonds with others.
Do not wait to experience a big drama to raise your hand.
If we never ask anything of others, we deprive them of the chance to share their insights with you, and vice versa.
Neuroscience research proves that a person who multiplies the actions for others activates the reward system of his brain and stimulates the feeling of well-being.
This is called the “caregiver shoot”.
Altruism is contagious.
Provided you don't rely solely on others and, conversely, don't fall into sacrifice.
We
, by Caroline Arditti press photo
The 3 ignition keys
To be true:
before the we, there is the I.
We connect better with others by showing ourselves as we are, with our imperfections, our vulnerability.
Most relationship problems are born out of fear, ours and the other's.
Identify your values,
those that are not negotiable.
It's GPS.
At each meeting, ask yourself: does this person share my values?
Not all of them, but at least one or two.
A common point opens the field of possibilities.
Multiply the first times,
rub shoulders with the unknown, experiment, alone, even if it's uncomfortable at first.
Not necessarily to go to the end of the world or to make a parachute jump, but to register for a book club, a cooking class, a dance...
