No More Coulant And Cheesecake: 15 Overrated Desserts And Sweets

Nobody becomes bitter by a candy.

Or if.

Especially when they are those ubiquitous desserts whose original recipes have been so distorted that, like tribute bands, they are not what they were.

Those that appear in a multitude of menus from restaurants and sweet shops in cheap, unorthodox versions and, generally, much more cloying than they should be.

Snacks capable of ending a regional association of diabetics that 98.4% do not give what they promise.

Because yes, dear

: there are overrated cakes.

Let it be clear that here we are not going against anything or anyone, but we love controversy and joking around.

For these two reasons we have decided to talk to experts from the confectionery world so that they can tell us which sweets they think should be put on the brakes at once.

This does not mean that they taste terrible, quite the opposite: if they are made properly they can be very tasty.

We are referring to those that, being so widespread, have ultimately become a kind of

de Borja.

Here is our list -tantrum- of desserts that are -unfortunately- in more places than the Holy Spirit:

panna cotta

“It literally means 'cooked cream', and it's a kind of Italian flan of uncertain origin.

How is it different from the one we have here?

In that it has a lot of cream and it does not curdle with eggs and a lot of care in the oven, but with a crude jelly ”, begins his public complaint Mikel López Iturriaga.

“It has neither the flavor of flan nor the grace of its texture.

It's like a bland flan for children, more curdled and pasty”, says Mikel with tension in 10/21.

And the foodie ayatollah does not end there: “Don't let the tifosi of the Italian tradition get flamenco on me: panna cotta tufa is old food from the sixties, which is when the first written recipe appeared”.

Luckily he is not registered in Turin.

Don't even bring it near MikelANA VEGA 'BISCAYENNE'

French toast

The gastronomic journalist David Remartínez risks his life by daring to criticize the most typical sweet of these dates: the French toast.

"It's alright, seriously.

You cannot charge eight euros for a piece of supermarket brioche bread soaked in milk with vanilla ice cream from Mercadona”, says David.

For the author of the book

, desserts tend to lower the level of salty dishes in restaurants, "because they require professionals with sweet training that not all businessmen can afford."

An example of this, according to Remartínez, is this classic Lenten snack: "The French toast is becoming the scandal of the devil."

Luckily he is not registered in Seville.

David doesn't get out of this aliveMIRIAM GARCÍA

red velvet

"There is no cake with more coloring than this, and that its use could be understood -although I do not share it- in desserts such as macarons, where the color indicates the flavor of the

inside", explains the pastry chef Sofía Janer, who continues : “But, what red thing does

taste like ?

Strawberry?

Raspberry?

Beet?

Oh surprise: none of these, it's just a cake that tastes like dodgy vanilla essence.

The owner of La Dramerie already finds this aspect insane, although there is something even worse for her: “On top she has a

-usually infamous- made from icing sugar, butter and cream cheese.

Ingredients that, combined with each other in an excessive way, only provide an extra sweetness and fat that is absolutely unnecessary and cloying”.

BUT WHY IS ROJA AMIRALI MIRHASHEMIAN (UNSPLASH)

chocolate

"There was a time when it was everywhere and it continues to be because the idea of ​​a cake with a melting interior is very attractive, who is not going to like it?" says Patricia Tablado, manager of the food networks, in a clear comparison of this sweet with the early Christian Roman baptisteries of the first century.

And although very appetizing

-the

, not the baptisteries, which also-, the reality is quite different: "In most cases it is half cold in the center and never as rich as it promises."

The confectioner Jon García has the same opinion: “The worst is always the

chocolate

And not because of the dessert itself -because if it's well done it's amazing-, but because in 95% of the places it's not a

: it's an undercooked sponge cake”.

The owner of Jon Cake -a cheesecake shop located in Barcelona- assures that he has found everything in this category, "from raw flour to ultra-liquid interiors or impossible-to-chew stones".

A sprawling nonsense, wow.

ScatteringANA VEGA 'BISCAYENNE'

Cheesecake

Since I don't know what year this dessert seems to come with opening licences, as if the government had published a Royal Decree according to which no restaurant can open unless it appears on the menu.

A good measure in case it was prepared properly, something that does not happen: it mostly consists of dodgy cream cheese with cream and sugar to cascoporro.

You know the national scene very well: stiff texture, baths in liters of industrial jelly, Pryca cookie bases and a more gooey flavor than the Mr Wonderful store.

And what is worse: a portion usually costs the same as filling the tank with diesel.

I'm not alone in this: "Many cheesecakes with jar jam are not worth the eight euros they charge you," says my colleague David Remartínez.

Let's all relax a bit RODRIGO KVERA

Carrot cake (carrot cake)

“What is that about calling

that, no matter how much carrot you put on it, doesn't taste like carrots?” asks Miquel Guarro, head pastry chef at the Hofmann School in Barcelona.

Sometimes, the least, Saturn aligns with Uranus and Capricorn in direct ascent "and you manage to find a good cake with the right and funny mix of spices."

But do not trust yourself, because everything goes to waste "when you see that they have put a layer of

, a white paste made from sugar, which is synonymous with the beginning of diabetes and coronary obstruction."

Frost it, kidWIKIMEDIA

Mochi

“They have become fashionable -the versions filled with mousse, ice cream or similar, because let's be real: the adzuki one doesn't eat it, not even Perry- and you can almost find them on the school menu”, comments Mònica Escudero.

According to the chief editor

, the artisans are expensive because making them has a process, and the industrial versions that are sold in many places "are unstoppable because the glutinous rice dough that covers them is usually much thicker than in the artisans."

“Come on, they are starting to be like the sweet baths: the idea and the original product are good;

what they sell you instead, not so much, ”says Mònica, who prefers to leave the issue of the quality of the fillings for another day.

There you take them JAONUN (PIXABAY)

Grandma's Cookie Pie

Patricia Tablado pours out her second criticism against something as widespread as grandma's cake: "Most of the time it's a pudding, I don't understand why it has become fashionable everywhere."

"They make you promises of square cookies and flan that tastes like childhood and in the best of cases they give you a paste, and in the worst, some fossilized and dry cookies", details the person in charge of the food networks, who asks the question that We have all made ourselves when we see this dessert: “Which grandmother did this?

Mine made fried donuts."

My grandmother did not do these things WIKIMEDIA

roscón de reyes

"I know that I will enter a garden, but it seems that in this world if you touch tradition you are Satan and it is not like that," says Sofía Janer as she enters the Doñana preserve.

“If we visit the old pastry recipes, we will find an abuse of sugar and aberrant fats.

Perhaps at that time they had not studied the nature of the ingredients, nor did they wonder how to get a juicy cake by playing with the temperature of the oven”.

An example of this, according to Sofía -she told me, the words are hers, believe me-, is the roscón de reyes, "a very dry, super-sweet bun decorated with candied fruit of a worrying radioactive colour".

And she concludes: “In most houses you eat because you have to eat.

And that no family member can think of saying that they don't like it or 'why don't we try the one from another pastry shop'”.

Frosted fruit in Chernobyl WIKIMEDIA

lemon pie

"As a client, I would like restaurants that, due to time, budget or expertise, cannot prepare good desserts of their own, in keeping with their savory dishes, would order them from external pastry chefs or pastry shops, explaining to the diner who has prepared them", declares David Remartínez, who affirms that this would improve the menu, they would collaborate with other companies or freelancers, "and the end of the meal would be more pleasant for everyone."

Once this reflection is over, he warns: "If they give me another hard cookie with a hard meringue and a lemon jelly, I swear I'll throw it out the window."

Don't put another slice on DavidKONSTANTINAS LADAUSKAS

Rice pudding

I declare myself a fan of well-done rice pudding, creamy, with just the right sweet spot and a hint of cinnamon and citrus.

But, oh, this delicacy is only given in 2% of cases, the remaining 98% is divided between two schools that I hate: the plastered one, which instead of dairy seems to have Pegoland, that version that you should eat with a fork and chisel;

and the liquid, pure soup, in which the grains swim as if it were a public pool in August.

Both, yes, have a common element: an amount of sugar that you are not able to burn even doing three ironmans in a row.

Enough already, please.

SO SÍMIRIAM GARCÍA

american style

These typical American cookies born in the thirties are the brainchild of cook Ruth Wakefield, who sold the patent to Nestlé for a dollar.

"What a loser", someone may think.

Error: instead, the name of his restaurant and his face appeared on all the packages of Nestlé chocolate chips along with the recipe.

Both the woman and these sweets became very famous over time, although a century later Mikel López Iturriaga is not convinced.

"They are made with butter, chocolate chips and several tons of sugar, and with all due respect to this lady, they are too sweet for me," says the contradictory leader of the foodie faction months after dedicating a video to them.

"French or Danish butter cookies give them a thousand twists."

Mikel does not like DIEGO DOMÍNGUEZ ALMUDÉVAR

Macaron

“How beautiful is a window full of colorful

with radioactive tones, right?

Especially those in Smurf blue, which are usually filled with an even more worrying blue”, comments the pastry chef Miquel Guarro with a bit of irony, nothing, almost imperceptible.

“That bite that should transport us to the Champs-Élysées, when we open our eyes, only leaves us in a sugar swamp,” says Guarro, who concludes: “And let's not talk about the filling, it's more difficult to find a creamy and flavored one than a restaurant without tuna tartare on the menu”.

Of all colors WIKIMEDIA

Chocolate cake

After his furious attack on

, pastry chef Jon Garcia focuses on another dessert that shares a main ingredient: chocolate sponge cake.

“It seems to me an abuse when you ask for a dessert after having eaten copiously in a restaurant and you find that cake caked together, that you can't even drink with a glass of milk on the side”, says Jon, somewhat engulfed.

"In the end you always end up leaving it because it's just very hard chocolate," declares this pastry chef with more sadness than Marco on Mother's Day.

This is one of the good ones JULIA LAICH

Ice creams

“If there is something I like and it has given me a lot of trouble when I ordered it for dessert in a restaurant, it is ice cream”, acknowledges Mònica Escudero.

"If they don't say in the letter who sells them, run away as if Pablo Motos were chasing you to ask you for an appointment: the probability that they will serve you industrial crap -and not exactly cheap- is tremendously high", recommends this

while taste a Mikolápiz.

Escudero says that she has tried "Redoxon flavored tangerines, some cream with more sugar than dairy and coffee ice creams that would make Juan Valdez cry", so when he wants a quality one after eating, he goes to the nearest artisan ice cream parlor. close.

And you, what dessert or sweet do you think could use a little break?

Leave us your tantrum in the comments block or on our social networks with the hashtag #PostresSobrevalorados