The multifaceted and energetic María Bestar (Madrid, 43 years old) accumulates several lives in one.
At 20 she signed a contract with Sony Music, and her song
De ella Pensando en ti
triumphed until it took her to dozens of Latin American countries and granted up to 40 interviews a day, when promotions did not have the boost of social networks.
“It was a lot of work, but there I learned to put enthusiasm into things, because each one had to be like the first, out of respect for the journalist,” she shares of a time that she remembers fascinating.
He lived in Miami, Mexico and Colombia, where, while composing and recording two more albums, he was involved in collaborating with street children, victims of sex trafficking, drug trafficking, battered women and attacked with acid.
She has returned to Spain and has made psychological violence visible as director, screenwriter and actress of her short film
De ella No estaras loca,
which will be shown this Thursday the 7th at the Malaga Film Festival.
For autumn she is preparing to direct the film that will be her debut feature,
Encerradas
, about motherhood in prisons in Spain in the nineties.
And she is already thinking about the script for the next one, for which she has interviewed dozens of women from the Silenced Childhood association, which fights to change the law that allows sharing custody of children with couples convicted of abuse.
“Maybe I also think about making a romantic comedy, which talks about valuing the present and what you have,” she laughs.
It doesn't stop.
More information
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Question:
In another era you would have been identified as a person from the Renaissance... Is being multifaceted now a value or a stigma?
Answer:
I think in the US they are much more used to it.
In fact, if you only do one thing, they look at you funny.
In Spain it seems that this vein is beginning to open a little, but I have noticed more reluctance.
Like they tell you: “But what are you?
Define yourself.”
I was with the short at the Coronado Island Film Festival in San Diego [California], and of those who won, most of us served as directors, scriptwriters, and stars of the productions.
And I think it's wonderful.
We have figures like Clint Eastwood or Reese Witherspoon and in Spain there are more and more.
Furthermore, he who is an artist is an artist.
He doesn't just do one thing, everything he does is creative.
And restricting creativity is a shame, they do it a lot in schools, but it shouldn't be.
Q.
And how do you face your next creative challenge with
Encerradas
?
A.
With horrible fear.
They say that the brave are the ones who are most afraid.
It's a challenge and I'm very excited.
The short is helping me a lot and I also want to make a film based on it that deals with vicarious violence [in which the man harms the woman through his loved ones and especially, through his children], which there is who still does not know what it is and that cannot be allowed in this century.
The singer, actress and director María Bestar, poses at the 8 y medio bookstore in Madrid, on February 28, 2024. Andrea Comas
Q.
Who are you addressing when you challenge with the title
You are not crazy
?
R.
_
To the women who at some point in their lives, victims of psychological abuse, have questioned themselves: Hey, could it be that I'm crazy and what I feel, see or perceive is not real?
It often happens that when there are arguments, the other party makes you feel that way, and devalues the feelings.
I think it is very important that when a person expresses their feelings, they are listened to and, you can agree or not, but respect them.
As they say in the US, '
let's agree to disagree
'.
Q.
And what impact do you expect with the message?
A.
I would love for it to reach the entire population that ignores psychological abuse.
Because we are used to the physical, but the psychological is not considered or is devalued, and in the end it is the one that precedes the physical.
So I would love for it to reach everyone.
Even to the women themselves, there are many who are not aware that they suffer abuse and that is very important.
All the women I have spoken to agree that physical harm, you see it, because from a young age we are taught that if they hit you, that is wrong.
Then, many said: “I would have loved if he had hit me so I would have realized it sooner.”
The psychological damage is not seen, but it remains for years.
Q.
The protagonist has a job, a good house... Is it your crusade to expand the stereotypical spectrum of an abused person?
A.
I have been collaborating with battered women's associations for many years and there is an idea that it only happens to people without resources or without education, and it is not true.
You would be surprised by the psychological abuse that exists in higher social classes because there is more silence, there is more shame, for what they will say...
Q.
What moved you to join these associations at such a young age?
A.
I don't know why because I haven't experienced that with my parents.
But children and older people are my weakness.
In these years I have seen many orphaned children or children in terrible situations.
And I realized that in most cases it was because the mothers were suffering, they were imprisoned or they didn't have a job... So I said, 'damn, you can help the children, but the one who will best take care of them is their mother.'
So, let's help mothers!
And then I started to investigate and there are terrible stories, like that of women who are victims of trafficking and that is why their children are also victims, or those attacked by acid, who can be repudiated by their children and every time they look at themselves mirror remember their abuser... One thing leads to another and I can't get out.
It's like a responsibility.
I couldn't sleep at night if, as a public figure, I didn't do everything possible to make a problem visible.
Q.
And you decide that part of your energy is also dedicated to that.
R.
I think you don't even decide.
It is something greater than you.
My son tells me that in
Spide-rman
they mention a phrase that is “
with great power comes
great responsibility,” and I have no other option.
If I can be a public figure and I can make a problem visible, I can't not do it.
And I feel very honored too.
I couldn't sleep at night if I didn't do something.
Q.
Do you think that this involvement can weigh you down?
A.
I don't know, it could be, but I don't care.
I don't always talk about these things either.
I usually write about what interests me, and I believe that audiovisuals are a tool to educate.
In any case, I don't care, it's not going to hurt me because I'm doing what I like.
If I had to think about what I should do with my life so that what others think doesn't harm me, I wouldn't do anything.
When you are genuine, it shows.
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