With
Les Yeux Fermes
(1), a comic strip inspired by her story, the actress Héloïse Martin, made popular by her film roles in
Tamara
and
Tamara, vol.
2
and his participation in
Dancing with the Stars
, decided to break the silence.
On his Instagram, @heloiisemartin posted a message at the beginning of March that says it all: “I’m 9 years old.
My life is changing.
Like one in ten children in France, I am a victim of sexual violence.
And I decided to tell you everything.”
What she does on social networks, therefore, but also in a comic book which describes a family celebration (the grandparents' wedding anniversary) where Émilie, raped as a child by her uncle, learns that the pedophile, who admitted the facts during a trial, was invited.
No one seems to mind... A shocking phenomenon, but unfortunately commonplace: “It is common for victims to be excluded from the family circle because they are considered disruptive elements.
We prefer to act as if nothing had happened, to preserve harmony at the cost of lies.
Close your eyes because it’s more comfortable, less complicated, less heavy to carry,” observes the twenty-seven-year-old actress.
Interview with a young woman determined to change sides of shame.
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Madame Figaro. What pushed you to make this comic?
Héloïse Martin.
In my diary, I record everything improbable, extraordinary or difficult I have experienced since I was seven years old.
I hadn't written about the sexual violence I had suffered for a long time.
And then at twenty years old, when I had become a woman, when I had won my independence, when I had moved to Paris and when my first film,
Tamara
, was released, I was very happy to join a party family… Except that I learned, like in the comics, that my uncle was invited and that no one had warned me.
I ran away without even waiting for the party to start, I understood that this was the straw that broke the camel's back and that I had to write about these incomprehensible facts.
Besides the fact that I didn't feel like I had the sufficient legitimacy to make a novel out of it, I wanted to reach children and adolescents, and comics seemed to me the perfect medium - it is accessible to everyone and puts into images what I I had experienced seemed to give more strength to my testimony.
However, you say that
Les Yeux Fermés
is not absolutely autobiographical…
The party that I evoke in the comic brings together, in fact, four parties in which I participated, three of which I was confronted by my attacker, and where I discreetly asked my grandparents, my cousins: “ But do you find it normal that he is there?
Why didn’t anyone warn me?”
Instead of spanning six or seven years, I condensed everything into one celebration.
My story is one of triple trauma.
Trauma of sexual violence and trauma linked to the decision to tell the story, first of all: it is undoubtedly the most difficult decision I have had to make in my life.
I don't know how I managed to say to my mother in my room one evening: "Wait, I have to tell you something."
Having to tell him, then start telling again, to associations, to lawyers, to the police, to the police who filmed me, to talk about a subject that I had no desire to talk about for a year, not to mention that at eleven years old, I knew nothing about sexuality, it was terribly difficult.
Then a third trauma was added when I saw that most of those close to me considered that we were a family and that we should stay united whatever the cost – except my parents, who fortunately always supported me. sustained.
The others didn't want to make a choice.
Also read: One in three women will be victims of physical or sexual violence in their lifetime, warns UN Women
So it was you who did it?
I'm not a hypocrite, I couldn't lie and act like nothing happened.
I now miss every Christmas with my family, every birthday, every holiday.
I excluded myself so as not to have to confront my attacker, when he was able to keep his place within the family.
If he had been a stranger, everyone told me, it would have been different.
But since he married my aunt... And it doesn't matter that he also raped his own daughter, my cousin, with whom I was hand in hand until the trial (where he admitted the facts), and who then made excuses to his father, saying it wasn't his fault.
He himself first thanked me for denouncing him, claiming that it had liberated him, then he began to adopt increasingly unhealthy behavior, sneakily throwing barbs at me during meetings. family, when people had their backs turned.
When he learned that I was making this comic, he left me a voicemail to tell me that it was revenge on my part even though he had done nothing wrong and that we had had moments of love shared.
And if he had chosen us, with his daughter, it was because we were the cutest…
Eyes Closed, by Héloïse Martin, Baptiste Magontier and Valentine De Lussy DR
How did you find the strength to break the silence?
Honestly, I was in too much pain, I couldn't take it anymore, it had to stop.
The trigger was watching an episode of the series
Special Victims Unit New York
which told exactly what was happening to me: the rape of a little girl by her uncle.
I understood then that what we were doing was wrong, and that we had to talk about it, contrary to what he wanted me to believe.
So I talked to my friends about it, who advised me to tell my mother everything... The trial didn't change anything for him, which is unfortunately common.
The lawyers I have been in contact with have all told me that getting a proper conviction in these types of cases is very difficult.
The attackers received a few months' suspended prison sentence and fines of around a thousand euros.
My uncle, moreover, acts as if he had never been convicted.
He had a second little girl, for whom I am very worried, and even if he recognized the facts, he does not care, he is not at all in a spirit of reparation.
The trial had no impact on his life.
I think we must also say this: we encourage victims to testify, but there are no real consequences for the attackers, even if they are found guilty.
Do you think this comic will help change things?
I hope so.
It's called
Eyes Closed
but I hope it will open the eyes of many.
Since the announcement I made on my Instagram, I have lost count of the number of messages I have received from young girls who have been in my situation, even from mothers or old ladies who have experienced the same thing, who have never been able to speak and who have lived with this weight for sixty years.
Beyond the victims, I hope to open the eyes of parents, and of society as a whole: we must protect children.
Writing was not revenge for me, contrary to what my rapist claimed, but a way of regaining control.
For years I was asked to stop talking about it, pointed at me with phrases like the one I used in the comic strip: “You should have the intelligence to move on. »
I am now accused of wanting to destroy the family.
My parents, for their part, were fortunately very touched, very proud.
I tried not to exaggerate anything or to minimize anything, they think I found the right tone, and for my part, I am happy to have completed this project.
I think of others, I also think of my daughter...
Do you feel like you are part of a fundamental movement?
Yes, and I feel honored.
I think of Judith Godrèche, I think of Triste Tigrede Neige Sinno, I think of Les
Chatouilles
by Andréa Bescon… I tried to put images and words on my story for others than me.
If thanks to my little public image, my words can be heard, taken into account, if I can help other people, other children... I would have liked, when I was in primary school, to have had a book like this one, which would have allowed me to understand what was happening to me.
We must know that one child in ten is affected, and that this concerns all backgrounds, all social conditions, and that we must go beyond clichés;
rapes do not always happen in darkness and screams, and in families where everything is going wrong.
The pages of Les
Yeux Ouverts
are very sunny, very colorful, because my family is like that: friendly and joyful.
We all cooked together, in a very cheerful atmosphere.
I missed it a lot, even if it is now too late to imagine re-entering this circle.
Even if he came out for one reason or another, I wouldn't come back: today, I protect myself, I protect my daughter, and I hope through this comic to help protect other people, other children .
(1)
Eyes Closed
, Héloïse Martin, Baptiste Gontier and Valentine de Lussy, ed.
Dupuis, 112 p., €15