Rotissería Los Kirchner: today Canelones Bolivarianos

05/30/2020 - 22:31

• Clarín.com
• Opinion

First of all, I would like to pose a scientific dilemma with a very difficult solution: What difference is there between a Boludo and a Pelotudo? Are they two different viruses or is it the same? If it is the same, does it mutate according to the host, transforming it into a Boludo or a Pelotudo depending on the case, or is it simply the same condition with a different name? Not even the Johns Hopkins Coronavirus Resource Center has been able to clarify the confusion between Boludos and Pelotudos .

This comes to mind because, while we continue organizing from this page the championship to consecrate the Pelotudo of the Year, today Jorge Lanata returns to television and has already announced that he is launching a new contest: El Boludo del Año.

Tremendous problem. If science has not been able to resolve the difference between a Boludo and a Pelotudo, how can we do now so that the participants know in which of the contests they have to enter? Do we consult the World Health Organization? Does Dr. Pedro Cahn define? Will they announce a participation protocol in the next show by Fernández, Larreta & Kicillof?

Nor can we leave the decision in the hands of the competitors. We are not going to pretend that a guy who perceives himself as a Boludo is able to explain what difference he thinks he has with an asshole.

On the other hand, the first note about the Pelotudos tournament published on this page accumulated exactly 2,066,629 readers on Clarin.com measured from its publication in March to last Sunday, according to the weekly report by Business Intelligence of Contents. Post. That equates to 20 rating points, not counting the readers of the paper newspaper and posts on social networks. Question: Does the rating that Lanata gets today add to the 20 points that this page already had with the Pelotudos contest or because it is a Boludos contest, is it calculated separately?

As if we did not have enough problems with the pandemic, with the default and with the tricks they invent to get Cristina off the hook, now this complication appears that makes the championship difficult and makes it more difficult to entertain society during quarantine. We will solve it.

Anyway, from here we wish Lanata a lot of success and hopefully tonight she will have as much rating with her contest as we had with ours. With 20 little dots, George. Kiss .

That said, let's go to the little story on Sunday.

Rotisserie “Los Kirchner”: today Canelones Bolivarianos.

"Don't worry, Quique. I also listened to President Fernández when he said Thursday that keeping company shares in exchange for help paying salaries is a crazy idea. You let the guy say what he wants. Cristina is going to go to Olivos, they are going to lock up for three hours and when the meeting ends, Alberto will leave with a chinstrap stamped with the face of Chávez and the songbook of Daniel Viglietti under his arm. Take heed to me that I am Tito, your brother-in-law of the soul, and let us continue with our plan: this time we must not resist, we must associate. Let them come, keep half the rotisserie and we will get rich with them. Like Lazarus, like Rudy Ulloa or like Christopher. Let's learn from history, Quique!

Forget about the Republic. Discard that book by Graciela Fernández Meijide that you have dedicated for her and download the painting of the Judgment to the Boards that you put in the kitchen. Take the photo of Alfonsín that you have on the nightstand and put the one of Gildo Insfrán Didn't you see Alberto in Formosa? He hugged Gildo, they exchanged viruses and he told us all that the guy is the role model. He has been in power for 33 years and has more and more poor people, more public employees and more stick-beaten native peoples !! Do you understand Quique? It's Stroessner with a padded beard. But they like it like that. They like to stay forever. And you are still insisting that we change the oil in the fryer. Forget Quique! We will use the same oil until the milanesas come out black !! We are going to call it Insfrán oil and bye !!

Didn't you listen to Mariotto? He said that after the pandemic he imagines "a very Peronist Argentina." In other words, Mariotto said that the country must be peronized. Let yourself be peronized, asshole! Let's think about the ticket, Quique. Do you remember La Rosadita? They only saw people counting silver. I want you to see us counting money. With that little machine wonder that counts at full speed. Like them, whiskey in hand !!

This time it has to be given to us. We entered at the right time. A little earlier, we would have had to take the food to prison. Instead now they are all comfortable in the country or in Puerto Madero . We arrived now that is when they begin to arm the businesses. Kirchnerism is like the Loom of Abundance, those who enter first win.

Let's change everything! Let's change that Argentine recipe of the Chajá Dessert that your aunt from Tacuarembó used to make. Instead of Almond, Vanilla and Peach, now we do it with three layers of Amareto, Americana and Ananá. It is the Budincito Triple A. And if you want we will decorate it with a little doll from Isabel and send it to you with a candle for birthdays. Let's give them all tastes! Don't suffer anymore, Quique. It is much better to be on the side of those who win once than to always be on the side of those who lose.

Let's do everything like them, Quique !! Let's never close again to fumigate. If they are our partners we ask them to arrange with the Bromatology boys to come once a year and we can say that we only find one cockroach per year in this rotisserie. It is the same logic that they use for testing . If Bromatology came every day we would have the record of 365 roaches per year.

They are alive Quique !! They speak for the gilada, but they wink at you and invite you to the party. Put on your suit and let's go !! Revive. They fill their mouths with public health but as soon as they catch a cold they go to the Otamendi . They say you have to save in pesos but every time they get hold of them they have dollars: López's bags, Cristina's safe, La Rosadita. All green .

Today an idea occurred to me: let's make the Bolivarian cannelloni and fill with twine . We add minced pancho de cancha mixed with striped bread, we say that they are organic pavita cannelloni and we arrange with Social Development to distribute them.

I ask you on your knees Quique! Let's not miss this opportunity. I don't want to be lower middle class anymore. I want country, I want Puerto Madero, I want a provincial government medical plane to walk with the kids around the country . Or to go to Rio de Janeiro. Mariotto already said it, "let's end with moderation". He is right, for being moderate ten years ago we did not change the Corsa .

Look me right in the eye, Quique: let's not be assholes or assholes, we have been for a long time. The time for liberation has arrived. Let's say it's outside with everyone. You and I both know it is for us. Enough Quique, I ask you for God. I don't want to die without driving an Audi. "