The secret to a good relationship lies in the first person who had two faces

You argue, shout and fight but always end up dreaming of a perfect relationship? The best secret to a good relationship lies in the first person in the world to have two faces

The secret to a good relationship lies in the first person who had two faces

In the past, people got married out of considerations of comfort, security and a desire to start a family. Today, however, people strive for much more in their relationships. They want an emotional and deep connection with understanding, love and listening. But how do you make such a connection? The story of the creation of Adam and Eve is a very familiar story. At first Gd created man, and then he fell asleep, took one of his ribs, and created the woman from it. But what is that rib that Gd took from man?

The Gemara in Tractate Eruvin, page 18, gives an interesting commentary: "Rabbi Jeremiah ben Elazar said: The first man had an inward face, which was said to be" backward and precocious. " There was a male, and on the other hand he was a female.The man and the woman were actually created as one body, one personality.Only then did Gd cast a coma on the man, then separated the half of the man from the half of the woman, thus making them two separate creatures.

Rabbi Chaim David Kowalski, the presenter of the digital gemara, explained that what the late sages wanted to teach us is that man and woman are in fact one essence, one entity in separate bodies. These are not two different people who happen to connect to each other, but two halves that came from the same whole , And naturally they strive to reconnect when they get married.When realizing this, our whole relationship to relationship and marriage looks different.

Good Relationship. Illustration (Photo: ShutterStock)

A couple hugging in the living room (Photo: ShutterStock)

If both spouses come to marriage, when each perceives himself as a separate person from the other, who just wants to receive from the other some favors - then it will be very difficult to build a stable and positive relationship. Even if at first there is love and brotherhood between them, at some point the differences and disagreements will begin to stand out, and then arguments and quarrels will begin, and the two will begin to think - what do I need all this for?

But if one understands that man and woman are two halves of the same whole - then the whole marital relationship looks different. The couple will no longer look at each other as outsiders who happen to like each other, but will understand that they are actually one entity, one soul, that needs to reconnect in order to realize itself. True, there are differences between them, but when everyone does not perceive themselves as a separate person, but about half of the perfection expressed in the relationship - then the motivation to overcome the difficulties is much greater, and the desire to understand and benefit the other also grows, and thus the way to marriage is much safer .

If you come to a relationship individually, arguments begin (Photo: ShutterStock)

Spouses arguing (Photo: ShutterStock)

Want to learn more topics according to the Gemara? This is your chance to join the digital gemara venture. This is a project in which you will watch a daily video clip based on the daily page presented by Rabbi Kowalski, founder and head of the Maorot Daf Yomi organization. As part of this, each person can be part of hundreds of thousands in Israel and around the world who take care to regularly study one page of Gemara a day, by watching a short daily video.

The passage is also published on the Digital Gemara website. In this section, you will meet daily at significant and fascinating points related to daily life, based on the daily study of the Gemara. The project is free of charge for its participants.

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