Loving parents, siblings with whom you fight and pull yourself together, freedom, material security, a good education - all of this is part of a happy childhood.
But things don't always go optimally.
Some parents want to shape their children, others have a certain view of their child, for example that it has certain characteristics or just not.
Or they burden their sons and daughters with expectations.
Even if the offspring meet expectations, it can be a lifelong burden.
Therefore it can be worthwhile for adults to deal with their own childhood.
Especially when you notice that impressions and ascriptions from your childhood are still very preoccupying or perhaps even inhibiting you.
Or make you feel like you're not entirely free.
In order to better understand the influences of that time and then leave them behind, it is important to first find out what kind of picture you have of your own past.
How do you rate the time you were a child?
And how formative do you experience the experiences from this phase of life?
There is now a simple reflection exercise for this.
With this you can record your attitude towards your own childhood.
The exercise is called "
understanding the
basic emotions"
The way you think and talk about your own childhood has a huge impact on how this chapter of your biography affects you.
So answer a few questions now.
You can do this in your mind.
Or you take a piece of paper and pen and write down a few sentences:
Question: Was your childhood happy, unhappy, or both and?
Question: Do you feel that certain childhood events have made your life difficult or complicated to this day?
If yes, which?
Question: When it comes to your childhood, do you have a distinct "because that's why" pattern?
For example, do you think: "Because my mother was so difficult, I have problems today."
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Now look at the answers to the three questions.
And embark on a thought experiment: Imagine you wake up in the morning and a miracle has happened.
From now on, your childhood no longer has any influence - and you are free to choose.
What would you do differently?
How would you notice in everyday life that you are free from the influences of childhood?
Try to feel and hold on to your posture and mood in this situation.
For example in an inner picture, with a thought or a feeling in your body.
You can always return to this mood in the course of the coaching.
In the coming weeks, try to act more often as if your childhood had no influence on you.
If this seems artificial to you, make it clear to yourself: there is scientific evidence that our childhood has an influence - but less than we often think.
Experiences in adulthood also shape and change us.
Continue reading ...
The pediatrician Herbert Renz-Polster explains in an interview how children become happy adults.
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