Cognitive scientists and developmental psychologists have long been pointing out that our memories are not reliable and true, but rather falsified, abbreviated and shaped by anecdotes.
This is especially true of the memories of our childhood.
We cannot even remember the first three years of life, because here there is the amnesia of childhood.
Nevertheless, emotional, non-verbal experiences in particular are imprinted in this phase.
This includes positive experiences, such as a good, loving and reliable bond with the parents, but also negative ones, such as traumatic experiences of violence or rejection.
Unresolved conflicts in this phase play an essential role in psychoanalysis.
The autobiographical memory only sets in later.
It is the narrative of our life, the backbone of our identity.
Only by presenting our life to ourselves and others as a story can we understand it, give it meaning and integrate individual events into an overall narrative.
When we look back, we interpret, establish connections, recognize patterns, identify life issues.
And not all phases of our life are firmly anchored in our autobiographical memory.
In younger adulthood there is a "memory accumulation" due to the fact that many experiences are made for the first time in this lifespan - experiences that are deeply ingrained in our memories because they were exciting, meaningful and emotional to us at the time.
At the same time, it is experiences that we repeatedly "call up" and that are thus further solidified in our memory.
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It is only as a young adult, between the ages of 18 and 25, that you are able to tell a real life story about yourself, that is, to explain to yourself and others how you became the person you are.
It can therefore make sense to deal with your own memories of your own childhood and youth.
Because this gives you the opportunity to look at them from a different perspective, to weight them differently or to dig up a few buried memories.
The following exercise will help you:
pictures of you
Find three pictures from an old photo box or album that show you in different phases of your life, alone or with others.
Look carefully at the photos and think about what is a typical story that goes with these photos.
What are the anecdotes that have been handed down, where do the attributions that you have heard repeatedly apply?
Then see if there is any other information that you can take from the photo.
How could it have been on the day the photo was taken?
Observe yourself: what positive feelings do you have when looking at the photos?
Are you surprised at how friendly or funny or relaxed you seem?
How atmospheric is the picture?
Also look which of the three pictures evokes the most positive memories and feelings in you.
Now take all the pictures again and consider whether your memories have changed a little: Do you perceive the photos more positively now?
Important: If one of the photos opened up a new perspective for you on what happened back then and brought new positive aspects to light - then hang it up at home in a place that often catches your eye.
If all three photos have a negative connotation: Take another look at your album: Where do you discover new things that you have not yet remembered?
Continue reading ...
You can find out more about autographic memory here.
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