"You have breast cancer," they were told, and from that moment a roller coaster began with a big dilemma: whether to continue the pregnancy in parallel with the chemotherapy treatments • Now, after giving birth to healthy children, five women talk about fear of death, fear for the fetus and support from friends
"There is a lot of power in this group."
From the right: Hadar Rokach with her son Lior, Adi Yizhar with her son Hadar, the group's founder Yana Darom, Karin Tamar Sheferman and her daughter Meged
Photo:
Efrat Eshel
"I can't wait any longer,
" Tehiya told me in an excited phone call.
"Must hold this baby and see with my own eyes that she is healthy and intact. All her clothes are already ready, folded and placed on the dresser, and that is what keeps me optimistic."
We talked a few hours before she entered the delivery room, when her blood tests showed a weak immune system, and she needed preventive isolation and not just because of the horror of the corona: Tehiya, 28, found out in the sixth month of her pregnancy that she had breast cancer.
"Pregnancy is without a doubt the greatest gift we have received amidst all this craziness of cancer," she told me.
"If I had not been pregnant, what would have lifted me from the abyss? Thanks to the pregnancy I kept memorizing to myself that I was in the process of bringing life into the world, and I must not think tormenting thoughts of fear and death. It is forbidden."
The next day, Monday, Raz Shira was born.
A sweet baby weighing 2.5 kilograms due to a buttock position was born by caesarean section.
Two hours after the surgery, while still dull and sore, Tehiya posted a picture of her baby in the WhatsApp group "Beautiful and Brave," of which she is a member.
A picture of the victory of life, of the victory of optimism.
The flood of wishes was not long in coming.
The members of the group, women in their 20s and 30s, are about to give birth or have already given birth while fighting cancer.
"I came to the group through a friend who matched me with one of the girls in the group. It is impossible to describe in words what this group gives me. I found sisters who are experiencing the same incredible journey, and they understand me best, and they encourage and reassure and make me laugh. Who would have believed me, the dossier. "She wears a head covering and her child is studying Talmud Torah, I will recognize a tattooed Tel Avivian and I will feel such a connection to her in my soul. There is so much power in this group that I can not imagine how I would have gone through my special pregnancy without them."
Tehiya and Samson Lieberman
live in Moshav Bnei Netzarim on the Egyptian border, parents of four - Roi (8), Hila (7), Maor (3) and Raz Shira the little one.
"We called her that because throughout pregnancy we went through hidden things: the disease, the treatments, the side effects, that we did not know where they were falling on us" they say, and on the other hand, "Raz in gematria is 207, like 'light'. And she brought with her great light in all darkness. ".
No hint of early pregnancy prepared them for the future.
Tehiya, a kindergarten teacher in the Ministry of Education, worked until the first closure.
Samson (32), a media man at ICL, worked from home because of the corona, shared with her the childcare and household chores, and Tehiya felt easier in this pregnancy, that she finds her own time for herself.
But then, in the 24th week, in the shower, she She found a lump in her breast. The next day she went to the family doctor, who said it was probably a hormonal change due to the pregnancy. However, she made an urgent appointment with a surgeon, who referred her for an ultrasound It is certainly not cancerous, because cancer does not hurt.
"So I reassured myself that it was not cancer, because it hurt me a lot," she recalls.
"But after a few days, the pain became unbearable and I made an appointment for an ultrasound. On examination, the technician looked worried. She asked me if I had a family history of breast cancer, and I said yes, that my grandmother had breast cancer.
" I asked her if everything was okay, And she did not answer.
She left the room and returned with another technician who looked anxiously at the screen.
I went into a dizzy spell of crying and stress, and my mother, who accompanied me, did not understand why I was delaying going out. "
That same day, the technician sent Tehiya to a surgeon.
"I went into it in panic. She looked at the test results and said, 'You have a lump in the breast, and also in the lymph node in the armpit. A biopsy must be done as soon as possible.'
Meanwhile, the ultrasound results have been entered in her personal area on Assuta's website.
"The results were written in English, in medical terms I did not understand, so I translated them in Google Translate and realized that there was a serious suspicion that the tumor was malignant. In retrospect, this understanding prepared me to come.
" A few days after the biopsy, Assuta Ashdod called and told me to arrive within an hour.
I already knew what they wanted to tell me.
I jumped Samson out of meetings and we drove together.
"At the hospital I sat in front of the doctor, she held both my hands and said to me: 'I have bad news. Your lump is cancerous, and you also have a cancerous gland in your armpit. We will treat you properly, but you are going through a difficult period. From now on. You look as far as you can, go through it like a big one, and get out of it.
"The first thing I asked, in the great shock, was: 'But what about my pregnancy?
How Can I Get Pregnant Chemotherapy? '
The doctor reassured me and said that nothing would happen to the fetus, that he would not be harmed.
Samson sat next to me and was in shock.
He was so optimistic until the diagnosis, and when we got the news we both just sat and cried our souls out.
I was already in week 27. "
When the tears dried up, Tehiya promised herself that from that moment on she would manage the disease, and not the other way around. Within a week and a half she showed up at the oncology ward in Assuta Ashdod to start intravenous chemotherapy, not before worrying about buying a wig. To me, and I will not be able to deal with myself in front of the mirror. "
In all the treatments she also decided to share with everyone, including her children, teachers and their kindergarten teachers. She also told the parents of the children in her kindergarten." I realized that sharing is a cure for the soul.
The fact that I talked about my illness gave me strength to cope.
I told and received so much help from the family, from the friends, from the wonderful community in Bnei Netzarim and from this wonderful WhatsApp group, that I was so lucky to join it. "
"Our chemo babies"
- this is what the mothers in the "beautiful and brave" group call the children born to them after chemotherapy treatments during pregnancy.
The group was founded by Yana South (39), the owner of "Yana Fashion", a chain of fashion stores and accessories that every woman dealing with breast cancer has heard of.
She sells them, among other things, swimwear and bras designed for those undergoing amputation, hair solutions and prostheses.
She started the group about four years ago, when in one week she was approached by four pregnant women who had been diagnosed with blue, and she realized that the right thing to do would be to connect them.
The group currently has 20 companies.
They hear about her from the social facts and the breast coordinators in the oncology departments, from the social networks, from a friend of a friend, and Yana envelops them with infectious love and joy of life.
Eleven years ago,
when she was in the third month of her first pregnancy, Jana also discovered a large lump in her breast, which very quickly turned out to be cancerous.
"I knew I was in a risk group because my mother had breast cancer, and a few years later also ovarian cancer, which overwhelmed her at the age of 56. In addition, a year before I got married I discovered I was a carrier of the mutation in the BRCA1 gene, or as they like to publicize it - 'Angelina's gene Julie.
"I was immediately operated on and the tumor removed, but I was told I had to start chemotherapy.
I was very frightened, and vetoed the matter.
I was more afraid of my fetus than I was of myself, and I had no one to consult, I had no support, so I did not listen to the doctors and made the wrong decision.
"At the end of the ninth month the tumor came back, in the same place. If I had undergone chemotherapy, it would not have happened. I gave birth to Noya, my eldest, and did not leave the hospital with a baby in a cell. With my parents back home. I started chemotherapy, after which I underwent resection and unsuccessful reconstructions as well as radiation. This is how I went on maternity leave for about eight months.
"I was very lonely in this campaign, so I started the WhatsApp group.
So that they know that they are not alone, and that they can give birth to healthy babies despite the chemo.
And so that they do not make wrong decisions, like me.
A great miracle happened to me because even though I was not treated on time, I am alive.
In fact, we decided to call Noya that because her name is an acronym for 'Wonders and Miracles Will Make the Name'. "
Since Noya's birth, the family has also been joined by Shir (7) and Peleg (3 and a half) who were born after Shiana was created. Many suffer from breast cancer and come to her stores. She organizes fun days, pampering dinners, fashion shows and fashion photos, proves to them that it is possible to recover, give birth again, and even breastfeed from one breast, as she breastfed Shir. After Shir's birth she underwent another mastectomy. , And after Peleg's birth she also underwent removal of ovaries and fallopian tubes.
"Many times we are the first to get the picture of a baby born to one of the members of the group, just as we are the first to get their picture shaved.
I say to myself and my husband: 'Another mother who fought for two went through this in peace!
Thank God! '' Is
n't it hard to run a group like this, which takes you back every time?
'' Not easy for me, 'her voice chokes.' I lost women from the group, who became metastatic.
One such, beloved and dear, mother of three small children, I lost just a few weeks ago.
The cancer has suddenly returned to her aggressively, and my heart is still torn and my soul is screaming.
There are women who left the group because they could not contain this story, and I understand them.
"But despite the difficulty and complexity, the optimistic stories outweigh everything and give me the strength to continue to support these women, to make them happy, to remind them that they are women. That is my destiny in life. Fear of 'what will' is the biggest challenge of anyone who has fallen ill, and I always "We pray that we will be busy only with the births and birthdays of our stunning chemo babies."
Meged is already a year and a half old.
Walking confidently, curious, coming back after everything her mother, Karin Tamar Sheferman, says.
"Hamsa on this candy girl," she admires her.
"That's why we called her that, Meged is candy."
Karin (38), who works for a philanthropic foundation in the field of education, and Lanti (39), a project manager in the building who live in Modi'in, already had two sons at home: Dori (7 and a half) and Nevo (4 and a half).
When they found out that the next in line was a girl, they were happy.
Until the 29th week.
"One day I noticed that my breast was growing a lot," she says.
"I was sure it had to do with pregnancy, the mammary glands, maybe the breastfeeding infections I had when I breastfed the boys. I went to a GP at the HMO and he gave me antibiotics, which of course did not help. My GP was on leave, so I went to another family doctor, who said there was no point in antibiotics but That I could put cabbage.
"It still seemed illogical to me.
I turned to a breast surgeon, who said that if I wanted I could do a biopsy, but that one could definitely wait until after the birth.
So three weeks passed.
In retrospect, it turned out that my cancer was progressing rapidly, and I could die.
"On the one hand, I was very busy with pregnancy and work and the children. But on the other hand, I realized that something was wrong with me. Until week 33 I went to a breast surgeon, who immediately realized it was a rare and aggressive cancer called 'inflammatory breast cancer'. She saved my life. The biopsy, she sat in front of me and in front of Nati and said: 'You do not have time, you must start like him.'
"Like him during pregnancy sounds crazy to me.
I was looking for studies on pregnant women who went through chemo, to understand what was going on with their babies.
The few studies I have found have shown that these babies are not harmed as a result of the chemo because it does not penetrate the placenta, which apparently reassured me, but inside I continued to nest the fear that I might harm the fetus, that I do not know the consequences.
"I started the chemo at the end of week 33. I got three rounds during pregnancy, a total of six weeks. I got the last chemo at week 38 and then waited for Shald and I would continue after the birth. During the treatments I was constantly anxious that I did not feel her movements, and everyone around me only intensified. The fear when they asked: 'What, is there such a thing as being pregnant? Is it safe? Are you not afraid?'
I said I'm obviously scared, but what's the alternative? To risk a premature birth? Or death? It was just being or ceasing, there are no other alternatives. I had a baby in my womb and two children at home, and I had a spouse and parents and a sister, and I wanted to keep living and smiling.
" I had a beautiful belly but also baldness, and I was skinny and gray.
This dissonance was unbearable.
I was supposed to be at the height of my femininity, creating life in my body, but that body also produced cancer cells and was poisoned.
"The day I did the first chemo, six days after the diagnosis, I went to order a wig. The first time I left the house with her was on the first day of Dori's first grade. I had to stop the tears, which came from both excitement and fear of not seeing him go up to class "He asked that I never come to pick him up without a wig."
Karin gave birth to Meged at the age of 39, at the height of the effects of chemotherapy, when she was in pain and weak.
Despite everything she insisted on a natural birth, without an epidural, just as she gave birth to her two sons.
"At the hospital I was told there was no condition for a natural birth because of my low blood count, but I really insisted. In those minutes I asked to be a midwife and not an oncologist. I gave birth to Meged in a natural birth accompanied by a doula, for two and a half hours.
" Need help with breastfeeding I fell apart.
I was not allowed to breastfeed Meged because of the chemo, and I could not understand how to bottle feed because I breastfed the boys full breastfeeding until the age of one year.
I was broken in body and mind, my female image and maternal image were hurt, and I cried non-stop.
During the entire treatment period I did not cry, I did not allow myself to fall apart even for a moment.
I was afraid that if I started crying I would get into a depression that I could not get out of, and it was important to me to be a vital mother to my children. "
Until the birth,
Karin did not know at what stage her disease was.
"During pregnancy, it is not possible to undergo a PET CT test, which indicates the stage of the disease and checks for metastases, because it involves radioactive radiation. Only when Meged was five days old did I pass the test, and fortunately the disease was stage 3 without metastases, which turns out to be a big difference. "It was only when I got the results that I was able to bring myself to give Meged a name. Until then, I just held my breath. Then I underwent mastectomy, radiation and biological treatment."
How do you manage to take care of a baby in such a situation?
"I was very weak and exhausted. I could not always pick up Meged when she was crying, I could not take the boys to kindergarten and school, but I insisted on normalizing this situation called maternity leave. I took Meged to the infant development and breastfeeding class. Once, because I was weak Because of the chemo, I fainted with a drop of milk, an ambulance was called for me and there was a big drama.
"I myself did not have the strength to organize on the logistics of receiving donations from the milk bank, but I know there are sick mothers who did it, and their babies were fed only breast milk.
This service is provided for free and is amazing to me.
"All this time I needed a lot of help, and I got it from me and our families. Nati accompanied me to treatments and meetings with the doctors, and mostly functioned with two small children and a baby. He was the one who dispersed in the morning, he was the one who went to parent meetings, he was much more present in their lives than me.
"I also received tremendous support from the members of the 'Beautiful and Brave' group, which I reached through Jana.
This is an amazing support group, which is most convenient to share, ask and share what we are going through.
And they all give place to one another.
"We also correspond on the children, on the relationship, on body image, and of course on logistics and all matters of bureaucratic issues and rights. Is it possible to get double the maternity allowance and disability pension, does it have to register well to put the children in the frame if necessary. Who are familiar with these complex issues, and the group has all the answers, from the personal experience of the girls.
”Viana, with her happy energies and desire to do good, is truly outstanding.
When Meged was three months old she invited me to be photographed for a fashion production, and that day just made me feel like I was me.
Not after giving birth, not mother, not daughter.
Just Karin.
And that was amazing. "
What next?
" Now I just want to stop fearing that the cancer will come back, focus on physical and mental recovery, and congratulate the routine, even though in the days of Corona it is challenging.
I have become accustomed to living in a world where nothing is certain, that at any moment everything can be reversed, that there is no control over anything and that one has to live every day.
"I have a lot of guilt about the kind of parenting my kids experienced in the year of illness, about the fears they instilled in them of illness and death. But on the other hand it reinforces the understanding that nothing is taken for granted. Taking your child hand in hand in first grade is not an obvious thing. Attend a Hanukkah party, read a story at night. We had a shaky experience together, as a family. We all still take care of ourselves, but as a family we have crystallized and become stronger and we look forward happily.
"It's not easy for me to be exposed, but I choose to encourage women to be attentive to themselves. 'It's nothing'.
I personally know three such women who, if they had not insisted on another opinion, would not be alive today. "
"Unfortunately, there are indeed
many cases of failure to diagnose breast cancer in pregnant women," says Dr. Daphne Barsuk, a breast oncologist at Assuta Ramat Hachayal Hospital. "Doctors tend to attribute the lumps to the hormonal changes that occur during pregnancy, and then the disease is discovered late.
"These are usually young women of childbearing age, sometimes with a family history. The pregnancy itself is not the cause of the cancer, but a tumor that is hormone-dependent - its growth will be accelerated in pregnancy.
" A woman suspected of having a lump in the breast should see a skilled breast surgeon.
A HMO doctor who is less specialized in the field may miss out.
In general, every woman from the age of 30-25 should be regularly monitored by a breast surgeon.
This is also true for young women who are not pregnant, because even there there are errors in diagnosis.
"Breast cancer is also an urgent condition in the diagnosed woman, especially in a pregnant woman, so the completion of tests, tumor type and treatment decisions must be prompt. It is the teamwork of a surgeon, oncologist, gynecologist and imaging person, who should be mobilized quickly, though Not all tests can be done during pregnancy. "
Some women choose to terminate their pregnancy when they find out they are sick?
"Yes. It depends on the woman's age, gestational age and the desire to have this child. Some women give up the pregnancy and decide to try to conceive again after recovery. In the early weeks of pregnancy the tendency will be towards terminating the pregnancy, to allow optimal treatment within a reasonable time frame.
" Even women who applied late for clarification, after palpating a lump several months earlier, for fear of being required to terminate their pregnancy, which is a misconception.
In fact, starting in the second trimester, chemotherapy can usually be allowed depending on the type of tumor and the stage of the disease. "
Dr. Shani Falloch-Shimon,
Director of the Breast Oncology Unit at the Sharet Institute at Hadassah Medical Center in Jerusalem, is the Editor-in-Chief of all Breast Cancer Guidelines and International Breast Cancer Guidelines for Young Women of the European Union of Oncology, and the first to establish oncology services Dedicated to young women who have had breast cancer in Israel.
"Breast cancer is diagnosed in one in 3,000 pregnancies," she explains. "The prevailing opinion today is that a woman diagnosed with early breast cancer can continue the pregnancy in parallel with treatments - especially if she is after the first trimester, because then There is less risk of pregnancy and fetus from exposure to general anesthesia during surgery or chemotherapy.
"This does not mean that there is no danger at all, but we try to treat a pregnant woman as we would treat her if she were not pregnant, and she will usually receive a very similar treatment protocol. It can be operated on during pregnancy, and most standard chemotherapy can be given. We know what to give and what not. , And the placenta gives some protection to the fetuses from most types of chemo.A pregnant woman will not receive biological or hormonal treatment, and we also try to avoid radiation.
"From European studies following infants exposed to chemotherapy during maternal pregnancy, it is known that in the short term there is a lower risk of lower than average birth weight and a slightly increased risk of preterm birth, but the data showed that over time these children were not at high risk for cancer, heart damage or significant cognitive impairment.
" We can say quite confidently that there is no significant risk of harm to the fetus, except for babies who are sometimes born smaller than average or born 37 weeks ago.
It is therefore very important that a pregnant woman with breast cancer be treated by a multidisciplinary team, at a medical center with experience in such cases.
"However, what can harm the fetus is the fact that they are mistakenly rushed to give birth prematurely. If there is nothing immediate in the disease that threatens the woman's health or impairment of quality of care, the sweeping recommendation today is to delay pregnancy as much as possible, ie until after week 37."
When can a woman who became ill during pregnancy become pregnant again?
"We recommend waiting about two years from the end of the treatments until the next pregnancy, but the issue requires a discussion with the attending physician and depends on what stage of the disease the diagnosis was. There is no one rule for all. If the woman receives complementary hormone therapy, a temporary cessation of treatment will be required." "Today, pregnancy after breast cancer does not increase the risk of recurrence of the disease. There is nothing more gratifying for me than to see a recovering woman enter our clinic with another baby."
Hadar Rokach (30) from Kibbutz Nachshon,
mother of Itai (2.5) and Lior (one year), received the diagnosis in the 24th week of her second pregnancy.
She describes herself as hypochondriac and anxious, so she did not waste a minute when she felt a lump in her breast, even though she was sure it was a congested result in the milk ducts.
"Within two weeks I had already done a biopsy, and even then, in the hallway, my husband Yaron asked the doctor 'what do you think it is?', And he replied: 'I think it's cancerous.' Without any prior preparation.
" I immediately thought of my grandmother, who was also ill. In breast cancer but did not undergo chemotherapy, and recovered.
A week later I was already told I had aggressive breast cancer, and I felt like I was falling into an abyss of death.
The doctor who informed me was not sensitive enough to tell me what I know today. "
What do you know?
" That I am considered an early detection, that the recovery rates from the cancer I have are high.
The doctor just made me think I was going to die.
Then, when the oncologist told me 'you need to go through like him', the first thing I thought about was my hair.
At that moment I forgot that I was pregnant, all I was interested in was my long, blond hair, which I made sure to groom.
My appearance is very important to me, and the feeling that I was going to lose hair and eyebrows and lashes, and in general, any photographer of femininity, was very difficult for me.
"I was sitting in front of her collapsing, and my husband Yaron also started crying. Then Lior kicked me in the womb, as if he reminded me of his existence. I asked her: 'Wait, what about my fetus?'
I have already prepared a speech of 'I am not going to give up the child', and Yaron has already filtered through his tears 'first you, Hadar, then the child.' But the oncologist reassured us and explained that the placenta filters the chemotherapy drug, and that there is no evidence of negative effects on fetuses Receive like him from the second trimester of pregnancy. "
Hadar and Yaron decided to hide the disease.
"I had a very hard time with the matter of pity, which automatically comes at the sight of a pregnant woman with baldness," she says.
"So we only told the family and a handful of friends, and I immediately went to buy a wig, even before the treatments started. It cost 17,000 shekels, and it did not interest me at all. For me, this wig was my whole world.
" To be the 'attraction' of the department.
I kept asking myself, what am I doing here anyway?
Instead of being preoccupied with prenatal shopping and family pregnancy photos, I get a vein-like transfusion.
"I cried every day and all day. Every time I looked at me, my eldest, I would cry. I wonder if I would get to see him grow, if I would be there when his first tooth fell, in his first love, in recruitment, in marriage, in all the things he would go through in life. "It was unbearable. Today I understand that cancer has changed my parenting, for better or worse. On the one hand I am more anxious for children, and on the other hand I try to give them my all and appreciate every moment.
" As a couple we also went through a difficult upheaval.
I realized that not only I have fears and difficulties but also Liron, who had to watch his wife go through what I was going through and had to stay strong.
"I felt I was the only one in the world who fell ill during pregnancy, and the only one who experienced this drama. When I joined the 'Beautiful and Brave' group I realized I was not alone. There are women there who go through exactly what I went through, who speak from my throat, and they calmed me. I was all day with the phone in hand."
Did you feel a different connection to this pregnancy?
"At one point I stopped touching my stomach, I stopped watching the fetus develop. On ultrasound I refused to look at the screen. I did not want to touch it. Over time I realized that if there is anyone strong in this story, it is. A small creature that grows in a sick body undergoing treatment. So who am I to break up? Slowly I got back to touching my stomach, letting myself connect to the life growing inside me.
"At week 33 I stopped the chemotherapy treatments to let the body get stronger for the birth, and when Lior was born, at week 37 in an amazing and easy birth, it was love at first sight.
I finally met my partner, who accompanied me from the moment of the gospel, through the treatments and all the difficult moments.
When he was in my arms, minutes after the birth, I said to him: 'From here mother can continue to fight alone, you have nothing to worry about'.
"A week after the birth, I left Lior at home and went back to treatments for two months. I underwent a partial mastectomy and radiation, and today I just hope to face all the fears and be healthy. To this day I can not get the word 'cancer' out of my mouth. For me it's like in the movies Of Harry Potter, that everyone is afraid to say 'Voldemort', lest he suddenly appear in front of them. "
A year after Lior's birth, Hadar found her professional vocation, and decided to study wig production at Panit.
"My wig saved me," she clarifies.
"She made me feel me, made me feel normal and helped me forget about my bare head. Even at birth I was with her. Today I want to work with women who are losing their hair, because of chemotherapy or for any other reason."
Julia Flex (36) from Givatayim,
a fitness trainer and dietitian, and the mother of Chemi (3.5), and Mikaela (11 months), also carry with her a family history of cancer: her grandmother died of breast cancer, her mother died of ovarian cancer, and she herself recovered from melanoma ten years ago Years.
"I am a carrier of the mutation in the BRCA1 gene, so during Mikaela's pregnancy I was followed up. I discovered the lump in the breast at week 13, and was diagnosed at week 17. I said to my partner, my father: 'No matter what, we are keeping this pregnancy' and he agreed with me and supported me. We both knew this pregnancy would be the last.
”The diagnosis indicated violent cancer, and at week 20 I started with chemo.
Even when I felt the lump, even before I knew it was cancerous, I read that chemotherapy was allowed during pregnancy, so there was no reason to terminate the pregnancy or postpone the treatments.
If I had chosen to wait with the treatments until after the birth I would not be sure I would have been interviewed now.
"The day after the diagnosis I was already joining Jana's group, and I saw that there were mothers who went through it safely, and that their babies were fine. They showed me what is called 'our chemo threading,' threading pictures of children born after breast cancer, and it strengthened me that I got the The right decision.
"This group is one hundred percent supportive. The fact that I shared my illness helped me a lot. When my mother got sick I hid it, to this day I can't understand why, and the hiding took a toll on me. It was a heavy burden to bear almost alone, and I had a very hard time. Since then I have realized that I have nothing to hide, and certainly nothing to be ashamed of.
"Once I was diagnosed I decided that this time I was sharing, asking for help, reinforcements and support.
I received thousands of encouraging and encouraging comments on Facebook and in reality, and along the way I strengthened others.
For example, there is a girl in the group who wanted to terminate the pregnancy, I talked to her and convinced her not to do it.
For me, this is a group from a year of reality and life-saving. "
Mikaela was born at week 38," beautiful and healthy, very developed, a small energizer baby whose smile does not go down her face.
She is most self-evident, like all babies chemo.
Even if I wanted to fall I could not, thanks to her.
She gave me the motivation to recover, to be strong and happy.
She was the light at the end of the tunnel.
"I had a hard time accepting that I was not breastfeeding, so I collected breast milk donations from amazing women, and Michaela fed them exclusively until the age of six months."
Julia continued to receive chemotherapy five days after giving birth, and when Michaela was two months old, she underwent a complete mastectomy. I keep reminding myself that life is short, and in spite of everything I am happier than ever. "
"Being a mother
has always been the destiny of my life, and it was clear to me that I would give birth to Ofri more siblings," says Adi Yizhar (43) from Ramla, software testing director and single mother to Ofri (4.5) and Hadar (1.3), "but nothing prepared me for breast cancer this week The 14th of pregnancy.
"After going into utter shock, I recovered and went to war of my life.
I fought over myself and my fetus.
The initial instinct said ‘don’t give up on this pregnancy’.
I guess if they had told me I had to terminate the pregnancy, because it's me or the fetus, or rather Ofri who would be left without a mother, common sense would have worked and made a different decision.
But I was completely reassured that I could continue my pregnancy, and so I did.
In addition, I made a decision to stay sane, and not stop working for a moment.
"I underwent eight chemotherapy treatments during my pregnancy, first once every three weeks and then another type of chemotherapy once every two weeks. Each treatment lasted between two and four hours. Throughout the treatments my immune system was very weak, and the at-risk pregnancy doctor instructed me to go into home isolation, long before isolation. Became a routine. Sometimes I had to keep Ofri away from me when she was not feeling well. And even then I continued to work from home.
"I gave birth three weeks after I finished the chemotherapy.
A few months passed, and then I noticed that Hadar was born on the 21st of Cheshvan, the day of the burial of my late father, who had died 17 years earlier of a serious illness.
This child has enlightened my name in my life. "
How did you go through the recovery period, the treatments and the birth?
" Even before the birth, I reserved help from a wonderful woman.
She came to treat Hadar on the days I was in the hospital for tests, right after the alliance, and when I had surgery to remove the tumor.
I had to entrust a baby several days old in other hands, it was not an easy experience, but I learned to trust.
"In general, this challenging period taught me a lot about who I am, and also about who I am not, and especially taught me not to be afraid to help others. I learned to accept, and thanks to Jana's group I met new friends, sisters for this path we follow."
Thoughts of "What if, God forbid, I do not overcome the disease?"
"Certainly. I'm a single mother, there's no father in the picture, and it took me a long time to realize that this horror movie belonged to me. And when it dripped I started to embroider the whole picture and understand the consequences. In my case, because I already had Ofri, the power and understanding I had to bring her brother or Sister were even bigger. I must not leave her alone, in the sense of the nuclear family.
"I am surrounded by a loving and supportive family, who give from the depths of her soul, but today, when I see the dynamics between the two, I realize it was the best decision I made."
The treatments that Adi
received did not succeed in eradicating her tumor, and today she receives another type of chemotherapy, works, learns baking and remains optimistic.
Julia has finished all treatments and is cancer free, "hopefully I will stay that way for many years. Just this week I finished half a year of chemo supplementation treatment with pills, and soon I will also undergo ovarian removal surgery to prevent ovarian cancer because I am at high risk due to carrying."
Citrus receives hormonal treatments and its disease in remission.
"Right now I'm healthy and hope I stay that way," she says with a smile.
Karin defines herself as healthy, and just this week decided to leave the group as part of the healing process.
Jana accepts her departure with understanding and love, "It's a great sign for health."
Tehiya has completed one round of chemotherapy treatments, and is currently preparing for the second round, then for resection and radiation surgery.
She promised the children that by the time they started the next school year, Mom would be perfectly healthy.
"I promised, and promises must be kept."
hagitr@israelhayom.co.il