"I like to make love a little drunk": sex and alcohol, a cocktail to be consumed in moderation

"I often have a little drink before, to relax and because it sets the mood."

If the interminable health crisis has put her sentimental and sensual life on pause for too long, Ariane has no trouble remembering that alcohol and sexuality are intimately linked at home.

At 25, the engineer never had a long relationship.

His meetings are therefore most of the time associated with a festive outing.

“Whether at a party, in a bar or with friends, I often met boys when I had been drinking, she admits.

And a date after talking on a dating site is also always around a drink.

Result, even if I am reasonable in my consumption, I have almost always made love having consumed alcohol ”.

A fairly frequent case.

A phenomenon of letting go linked to the effects of alcohol

If it has halved in nearly 60 years, alcohol consumption remains very high in France.

In 2017, French people over 15 still drank almost a liter of pure alcohol per month, according to Santé Publique France.

The variations vary a lot by age and sex, but 29.8% of men and 20.3% of women drink alcohol between one and three times a week.

Regular drunkenness affects nearly 20% of 18-24 year olds.

A public health issue that telescopes with sexual activity.

For the better when consumption is moderate, but sometimes for the worse.

“I like to have sex when I'm a little drunk,” says Stéphane.

I find the sensations stronger, the pleasure more intense.

It's like I'm letting myself go a lot more.

And that clearly excites me a lot more ”.

This phenomenon of letting go is directly linked to the effects of alcohol.

"It is a disinhibiting product with an effect on the prefrontal cortex which is very important in sexual desire," explains Aurore Malet-Karas, doctor in neuroscience and sexologist.

It is for this reason that shy people tend to fall into alcoholism.

There is an effect on the perceptual system.

The sensations are heightened.

This disinhibition can be very strong.

But it's a trap ”.

"I sometimes regretted ..."

Because if some like Nathalie adore "the impression of lightness that the combination of sex and champagne gets", the decrease in vigilance can indeed lead to a relaxation in the reflexes of protection.

Hence the increased risk of contamination by STDs and STIs or unwanted pregnancies.

It also leads to an increase in unwanted sexual practices or intercourse and violence.

Alcohol in too high a dose also has a hormonal effect and causes erectile or vaginal problems.

Do not throw any more.

“I sometimes regretted having drunk too much and especially waking up next to someone that I did not want at all to have in my bed, deplores Sophie.

I'm lucky there never was a drama.

But clearly, I did things sexually that I would never have accepted if I had drunk mineral water ”.

However, recourse to alcohol is regularly justified for its effect on self-confidence and opening up the field of possibilities.

“When you've been drinking, everything is a little more beautiful and easier,” notes Corentin.

Having a drink is also to give me a little courage, I have the impression of ensuring a little more ».

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These couples faced with the decline in desire

“Alcohol certainly allows barriers to be lowered, but the danger is to think that we need that to seduce or have a sexual relationship, resumes Aurore Malet-Karas.

It is difficult to set the limit, but all excess is dangerous.

At the beginning, there is a cool and boosting effect but quickly, the effects are catastrophic on the desire, the erection, the libido.

It can take a long time to regain confidence and self-esteem ”.

For some, life without a place to party for a year, however, has had the effect of awareness.

“Since we are doomed to find something positive in the current context, I find that this allows us to make fewer mistakes,” notes Marie, a 30-year-old Parisian.

It often happened to me to go to sleep with a guy I met in a bar and realize the next morning that he was an absolute badger.

There, I first speak at length with boys via apps and then during walks outside during the day.

We can tackle a lot of subjects, while being sober and composed.

And the curfew leaves a good opportunity then, either to escape, or to arouse a little desire and frustration before seeing each other again… ”

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