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Easy to slip on - and go!
Photo: Francesco Carta fotografo / Getty Images
Dear investors of the »Den of the Lions«,
We learned with great enthusiasm that you want to promote the »Pinky Gloves« - pink gloves, presented by two men, for single use, whenever women want to insert or remove a tampon.
Congratulation!
You are completely correct in assuming that this is one of the bigger problems women on this planet and in 2021 will have to face: they want to stop touching their vagina while they menstruate.
Coup!
more on the subject
Discussion about menstruation: »It's actually a product that protects men's souls« An interview by Nora Gantenbrink
What our human hands, we as addressees now unfortunately have to relentlessly reveal, have to touch everything, is actually: Ihhh!
And that's why, sorry, we'd like to go into more depth here, not the finger of course, just this product idea that promotes humanity.
What we also need now:
Penis Gloves.
Men peeing while standing hold their penis tight.
With your fingers!
Sounds strange, but that's how it is.
Rumor has it that not everyone wash their hands afterwards.
This archaic custom must finally be transferred to modern times.
Our
penis gloves
for pulling on while strulling are available in many colors, choose according to your temperament: sky blue, baby blue, admiral blue, aquamarine blue, and of course: azure blue (RAL 5009).
Baby gloves.
Do you know that?
You change a baby and just think that's stupid!
Skin contact with the newly hatched creature and possibly its excretions: everything does not have to be, is completely unworthy of the land of poets and thinkers and especially the land of engineers.
Well: put on
Baby Gloves
before
you
even start
your little ones' envelopes!
Dog Litter Bags Gloves.
When the mutt has done its business, it is in most cases a bad smelly thing.
Warm and soft!
Ugly on the sidewalk!
You can smell the mustiness through the dog's bag.
Please put the inconvenience aside by
wearing
dog
waste bags
while you
pick up
the dog waste in the dog
waste bag
from the floor.
In our gloves for dog poop bags, there are heat-blocking steel caps exactly where your hand has to touch the warm poop.
Pimple Gloves.
You don't have to be embarrassed: Always have a packet of gloves in the medicine cabinet - in case something sprouts on your face again.
You only know moments in which the pus sticks to your finger after expressing it from stories of bygone days.
Booger Gloves.
Quite normal: boogers.
Annoying: What to do with the boogers once you're outside?
On your own fingers?
We can talk about everything openly: Popping with gloves means: no more smearing, no more looking for a handkerchief, no more eating.
After every mess you only do one thing: Glove down!
And because something else is immediately obvious
when it comes to popping
, namely: Chips, here's another tip: Our
Popel Gloves
are also suitable if you want to avoid the crisp crust that forms on the front of the fingers when the bag is flattened.
Spit Bags.
Closing innovation from Weber-Laurenz: footballers who spit while playing will no longer have to do it on the lawn, but can
dispose of
their spit
directly and discreetly on the wrist
using our
spit bags
.
The pictures of female and male athletes whose spit flies wildly around their heads in the heat of the moment really don't belong in the newspaper.
But at best in the history books.
Dear investors
, maybe you are now thinking: "Penis in hand - I always do it, it's practical, that's how men pee!" And
dear investors
, maybe you object now, a few pus pimples or baby pee, that is natural, that belongs but about that.
In these cases we recommend: Put an end to the idea that direct contact with the body is desirable.
If none of our product ideas have convinced you,
we
have
one more thing
:
Investors Gloves.
You will certainly get the embarrassment at times that you have to throw each other around the neck because of your daring.
Use our protective gloves so that your counterpart does not seem so greasy to you.
No glove, no play!