Sabrina Diaz Virzi
08/12/2021 6:01 AM
Clarín.com
Families
Updated 08/12/2021 6:01 AM
When the pediatrician
Carla Orsini
had the first of her five children, everything she "knew" collided with reality.
As she recounts in her recent book
100 Questions and Answers on Respectful Parenting
(Planet), her desired motherhood redefined her priorities and her way of traveling the profession.
Former resident of the Ricardo Gutiérrez Children's Hospital, the first year she wanted to resign: full-time maternity kindergarten for the baby and endless guards for her, breast pumps in the bathroom and a lot of sacrifice.
"I decided to continue, thinking of giving my children a better future and the example of a mother happy with her vocation, passionate about her work," he says.
Carla is also a reference for school health and a pediatrician at CeSAC 31, where she provides comprehensive and interdisciplinary assistance in vulnerable neighborhoods.
And she runs an Instagram account with a community that follows her day to day, informs herself and laughs with her.
Carla Orsini, shortly before giving birth to her last child.
Photo: courtesy.
A couple of weeks ago, she began her
fifth puerperium
.
“It is a transformative stage, with a lot of introspection, changes, readjustments.
All my pregnancies, postpartum periods, my ties with my children are different.
I learn new things with everyone and experience it from other places and perspectives.
Of course, at some point they come together ”.
“This puerperium finds me well accompanied and supported, but with anguish typical of going through unexpected health situations.
Vulnerable and fragile.
Having five children does not guarantee anything.
Not being a pediatrician either.
There are imponderables and obstacles to always overcome ”, he comments.
View this post on Instagram
A post shared by Carla Orsini Pediatrician and Mom (@ dra.carlaorsinipediatra)
Network tribe
The (and) pediatric doctors who highlight the
"human" side
are today not only sought after to care for children, but they also became references and even a company, by showing their own motherhood and trying to cum from the mandates of a "perfect" or "exemplary" parenting.
Carla is one of them.
“Pediatricians are people with stories.
Showing a reality that is neither perfect nor romanticized makes them see themselves reflected and brings us much closer to families ”.
Did moms (and dads) need to form a tribe, bond with people to identify with, in addition to being told "what to do"?
“The tribes were and are the support of the upbringing.
A sustaining society, family, system, state is essential to understand upbringing as collective, and not department.
Relieve, build a net, support network ”.
On the rise of
social accounts for doctors and pediatricians
, he says: “I think there is a need to feel accompanied by a health professional.
Accompanied in every way, do not feel underestimated or judged.
In some cases, the ability to actively listen, to put oneself in the place of the other (
empathy
), to move away from the hegemonic place of knowledge and imposition
has been lost
.
Of not believing themselves gods or judges, but human beings ”.
In addition, he adds: “It seems to me that there is also a thirst for information to decide freely.
That is why the rise of professionals in the networks.
In addition,
medical consultations became express
... Probably due to a perverse health system that pushes to see only disease, to go to the punctual, to attend many in an hour and to put aside the integral and interdisciplinary approach ”.
The five children of Carla Orsini, a pediatrician.
Photo: courtesy.
Accompany with memes
He started his Instagram account (@ dra.carlaorsinipediatra) in 2017, with the “need to communicate a message about vaccination that opened a beautiful door.
At the beginning, with posts that were purely informative and quite technical ... little by little, my facet as a mother emerged, I let go and opened up.
It was at that moment that the community grew ”.
View this post on Instagram
A post shared by Carla Orsini Pediatrician and Mom (@ dra.carlaorsinipediatra)
There she combines her role as a pediatrician and mother with
information and humor
.
“I think it's therapeutic: laughing releases endorphins and improves health.
It is part of my daily life, I face my life laughing at myself.
In my family, laughter is a fundamental pillar, they are all very funny, ”he says.
One of its inevitable codes are
memes
, which help to de-
dramatize
experiences and situations related to childcare.
Such is the complicity that they generate that, in the midst of the puerperium, she uploads several to her Instagram stories so that they "do not miss her."
“The mapaternity memes fill the stories.
Sometimes they write to me saying that laughing woke up the baby ... That's terrible!
(hehe) And there are people who only follow me because of memes ”.
A thousand and one ways of parenting
A professional that he cites several times throughout the book is the pediatrician Carlos González, considered one of the leaders of respectful parenting.
In a recent interview with
Clarín
, the Spaniard said that he wrote his iconic book
Bésame mucho
(2003) because he saw many mothers and fathers worried because “they continued to take care of their children as has always been done (taking them in their arms when they cry, or putting them in the bed with you when they wake up at midnight) but, suddenly, they found books and 'experts' telling them that this was all wrong ”.
Among her "one hundred questions" Carla questions when the natural of raising was lost and how "fundamentalisms" influence.
He tells
Clarín
: “
They made us –and make us believe that we need manuals
and orders to breed.
That there is only one way.
And it is not true.
This generates guilt, frustration, insecurities, anguish.
There are as many ways of raising as there are families in the world: there will be neither better nor worse, but a construction for each one ”.
"They made us believe that we need manuals to breed," says Carla Orsini.
Photo: courtesy.
- In your book you say that "to change the world, you have to change the way you raise." Why?
- I really believe that to change the world you have to change the way you raise.
The children and adolescents of today are the adults of the future.
If we breed to live together, tolerate, listen, empathize, to be happy and not first, the world would be kinder and less hostile, selfish and competitive.
If we raise loving and respectful children, that's how they will be as adults.
"Be the adult you needed as a child."
- Which of all the questions you answer in your book would you need to reread today?
- The last one: "Am I doing it right?"
It is the eternal restlessness of the mapaternity.
Look also
Carlos González: "When I wrote 'Bésame mucho' I had never heard the word 'colecho'"
What is post-weaning depression (and how to prevent it)
Why you should not normalize bad sleep, even if you have young children
