Three years ago, when he was 41, Ohad Hitman received a warning call from the direction of his chest.
14 years after his uncle's wide heart, the late Uzi Hitman, died at the age of 52, his nephew's body also signaled that he should be careful.
"It was Monday. I played a song to Ren, my partner, and we made dinner together. Suddenly I felt a stab in the heart and electricity in my left hand. Ren said to me, 'You have an anxiety attack.'
"Now, I know what an anxiety attack is. I'm in a lot of anxiety attacks. Actually being an active artist I know what it is, even thoughts like whether an audience will come or not, whether the song will be successful or can not produce stress - but it was not anxiety. Ichilov in a taxi, and on the way I called my sister Anat.
"But then three doctors jumped on me and said, 'You had a heart attack, and now you're at the height of the attack. If you had arrived in an hour, it would have been a stroke.' I had three catheterizations. The main artery was 95 percent blocked. In retrospect, it Apparently there was a combination of genetics, a less strict diet and stress.
"After two days I came home, and returned to work within a week. I did not really change my habits, but I do stick to a good diet, do sports and especially less put myself in stressful situations. The moment I hate the most is when I go to the kitchen in the morning and take the medicine from the third drawer. "That I have to take to heart. Dilute. It's half a minute a day that I despise. Suddenly I became a grandmother."
not exactly. You ran a short time later in the Tel Aviv Marathon.
"My heart attack ruined my preparations for this marathon. I was supposed to run 10 miles, and I was at peak fitness. In the end I ran very slowly, with a trainer next to me, with everyone around me hysterically running just three weeks after a heart attack. But I did it, because as usual, garlic Nothing will stop me. "
• • •
The heart is not the only thread that connects Hitman and his famous uncle, who died suddenly in 2004.
Now, and for the first time in his life, Hitman dares to deal directly with Uzi's materials and presents an entire performance of his songs.
"Hitman Sher Hitman" will be performed on October 30 at the Tel Aviv Museum, as part of the 2021 Piano Festival.
At least at the beginning of your journey you seemed to have run as far away from the reference as possible. You wanted to be alone.
"It's accurate, but it's amazing how many parallel lines there are between me and Uzi, which I didn't catch. Even the heart attack. For years I really avoided singing his songs, or attending tribute evenings in his memory, because of the cliché of 'succeed or fail in my own right.'
"Uzi passed away just before the release of my debut album, when I was 27, and he managed to be a guest on my performance in 2004 at the 'Days of Singing' festival in Holon. I did not consult with him, but I remember dialogues between us."
Were you close?
"Yes, but I felt he was flattering me, and at the same time disrespectful. He could have said 'well done you study, but all your friends from the academy, who disparage me for not knowing characters, teach my songs.' He was self-taught, did not know characters."
Why did you feel he was underestimating you?
"There were passages he did not let me be there. I remember, for example, a holiday evening at his house, when I was a teenager. , But I really remember he did not let me be there for him.
"On the other hand, he made David's gestures that today, as a father who volunteers in kindergartens and schools, I know how to appreciate. When I was in first grade he came to my birthday with a guitar. But over the years I have learned to laugh about it and understand that no matter what I do in my career, I will always be 'Uzi's son'. "
In his youth, with the late uncle Uzi Hitman. "I reached a point in my life where I admit that it is a privilege to be his nephew," Photo:
What motivated you to suddenly do a show of his songs?
"I have reached a point in my life where I am very confident in my talent. I can fully admit that it is a great privilege to be his nephew. He is one of the most important cultural food fathers in the country, and it is not a tribute evening. Uzi.
"In the show I will sing my songs and of course his hits. All the songs are combined with his statements. I found in a pile of his notebooks and binders, which his son Ido brought me, a list of jokes that Uzi wrote in a yellow notebook, and this is a riddle Humorous links. "
Is it a fan nephew show, or did you allow yourself to change things and criticize as well?
"I also allow myself to criticize him on stage, but only from a place of respect, not contempt, to give the right focus to his works. There are songs that I think had incorrect adaptations, and that's why they failed, so I try to give them an interpretation. My own, for example, 'Stopover', which had a mainstream adaptation, and I turned it into a theatrical chanson in an adaptation by Sasha Argobi, which respects Uzi's lyrics and melody.
"I and Ido, who is a good friend of mine, experience an exciting process together, go through Uzi's archive. We found a song there that he did not finish writing. I saw the versions and understood what he was debating. Then I made a decision for him: I compose the song like him and record and sing intentionally. "Like him. The song is called 'Before You', and it will be released soon as a single. When I played it to Ido's wife and my father - they both started crying. I sing and hear Uzi above me."
What else did you understand about him working on the show?
"Today, as a mature musician, I know Uzi did something almost illogical. He broke into several audiences, including children, a traditional, national audience - but look at the fact that the radio did not play it. He was frustrated by it. In working on the show I realized I was just him. It's like it. Doing a few things, but the fact that Galgalatz ignored me for 13 years - that's what bothers me. Suddenly I saw the parallel lines between us, and I thought this pain might be genetic.
"How I would now like to sit down with him and tell him 'you do not know how much they loved and appreciated you.'
• • •
This month Hitman has every reason in the world to be a happy musician: a new musical by him has been accepted into the theater (after "Billy Schwartz," his previous musical, became a schlager);
A documentary that accompanied him and his partner on a journey of shared parenting is released;
A song he wrote and composed serves as a major American company, at her invitation (after hearing his material as part of his overseas career development);
He was appointed head of the musicals program at the Rimon School of Music;
And of course the show from Uzi songs.
But Hitman, according to his testimony, finds it difficult to relish the blessed period, and is unable to embrace the existing and enjoy what is happening.
"This is something in my character. I will give you an example: two days ago I received excellent news that my new musical, 'The Most Beautiful Year of My Life', will be co-produced by the Haifa Theater and the Habima National Theater. Wrote?
"But I concentrated on the word 'but ...', which was said there. They said the musical would only come up in a year. So instead of rejoicing I went into a black bile of a few hours. It still hurts me now, when I remember and tell you that.
"It's something that comes back all my life. In the documentary about me and Ren, I was filmed at the premiere of 'Billy Schwartz' at the Gesher Theater. You can see that I'm not really there, and that I'm busy wanting to be home with the kids. "The 100. Until then I suffered. I kept asking why the actors and musicians are wrong? Will I be the artist of one musical? Do I be valued?"
Also in the movie, when talking to you about your success, you answer that most of the things you did fail.
"If my song used to not go through a playlist in Galgalatz, I would cry for four days. Today it has changed for me. After a few minutes my son says to me 'Dad, let's write a comic,' or my daughter asks me to sing to her from the musical 'Annie' - and the pain passes. .
"It's not that with the kids I suddenly saw the light. The pain is still there, but it's duller. I've experienced it in the last few days. I realized that what excites me the most, with all the cliché, is the doing. I am happy only when I do, not when I reach the finish line. "Today I have the serenity that allows me to look at the depression of two days ago and say okay, give it a place and move on."
Did you go for treatment?
"Only one treatment? Two months after the children were born, and after many white nights, I went for treatment for two years. Once every few years I go, I am very self-aware."
We meet at the new house in Ramat Hen where Hitman lives with Ran Harush (43), a commercial producer, and the twins Oh and Berry, 6 and a half years old.
The family moved here from Tel Aviv a month ago: a spacious private house with a large yard, a home studio for a fan and a work area for Ren, with a grand piano for those entering the living room.
The walls are decorated with art paintings, books and notebooks on the shelves.
How are you as a father?
"In this matter I was constantly inferior to Ren. I felt he was an amazing father with patience and calm, and that with me it was in the mood. It took me a while to understand the matter of parental ability. I give my hundred percent, but I am more important to myself than to be." The father of the children. ”My children earned me as a father as soon as I chose to invest in myself.
"What excites me the most today is that Shabri is excited to start a comics class, and that Eva wants to sit down with me for a date in a cafe and talk about a musical. A year ago she said to me, 'I will be a Festigal girl.'
And she replied, 'Dad, if I hadn't auditioned, I probably would not have been good enough and I should have practiced more.' I said to myself, 'Okay, education has worked.' "I want to." This is my daughter. Her father closed the doors and no one was willing to pee on 'Billy Schwartz' - but he insisted until it happened. "
With spouse, Ren, and twins Oh and Berry.
"It took me a while to understand the matter of parental ability," Photo: From the private album
• • •
Hitman runs a video on his cell phone in which Eva Sarah is seen with talent, as he accompanies her on the piano.
"It's not that I want her to be a musician, but I certainly recognize her talent for the stage, for the front. Everywhere she goes she is said to be conquering. She is very musical, she sings excellently.
"Berry was diagnosed as gifted, and his interests are not necessarily the same as mine. I write comics with him, flow with him. He's sick of mythologies, and a week ago told me he's famous because his uncle, Uzi, famous, his dad, fan, famous, and he himself appeared In 'Replacement Mother' (a reality in which Hitman was replaced for a few days with Jackie Azoulay; MK).
He informed me that he was the youngest child in the world to break into a computer firewall, and that he wanted to be a hacker.
"I had a great fear that we were hurting children by the very fact that they had a father and a father. When Eva and Berry were two and a half years old a girl approached Eva and asked her, 'Where is your mother?'
Oh replied: 'I do not have a mother, I have a lot of fathers.' At one point we went to the parent counselor for treatment because we felt we wanted to upgrade as parents. They will cry in the future on the psychologist's couch you ended their lives in. '
"So yes, Lava lacks female characters, because no matter how soft we become with her - me and Ren are not women. Although Eva does facial treatments and makes me up nicely. She has some female characters in life, including my mother, sister and close friends.
"Michal Amdursky is a very good friend of ours, and Eva sees her as a good mother figure. Sometimes she says 'Mother Michal' and looks at me. It does not stress me, I release. Ren can be stressed by it, but I say, I am not a woman, Ren is not a woman - And you have to accept that. "
In your musical, "The Beautiful Year of My Life," you boldly touch on matters of parenting and relationships.
"I started writing it before Corona. It's a musical where the four characters are parents, and there I do a great mental arithmetic with myself as a parent, putting the truth in my face. The musical describes what happens to young and successful couples when they have their first child - and they believe "It includes the doubts and the searches and the thoughts also about conquering and flirting outside."
Something that also happens in your private relationship?
"You always ask if I write about my life, the answer is yes, and probably in the play I am an officer for dramatic needs. The amazing thing about me and Ren is that we are very confident in our love. We know to let go, and whatever we do, we will never hurt each other. Ren stands "I'm doing very big commercials with international stars now, and I'm happy that my best friend can break into the biggest and strongest career. I'm happy for him."
• • •
He is 44 years old, a native of Ramat Gan who spent most of his childhood in Raanana. Son of Dalia and Haim, senior members of the National Insurance Institute, and eldest brother of Tamir (41) and Anat (36) - both musicians themselves. After graduating from Thelma Yellin High School, a period during which he also appeared on the "Young Tel Aviv" program, served in the Education Corps, where he was the musical arranger of the military bands. Upon his release, he studied at Rimon and the Jerusalem Academy of Music, and at the age of 28 he released a debut album named after him, from which came the big hit "Tell Him".
To date, he has released four albums, an international album as part of a group and an album of the musical "Billy Schwartz" - a work he worked on during his studies and in 2013 appeared on the "Musical Holiday" in Bat Yam.
The big breakthrough came in 2015, when "Billy Schwartz", who describes Billy's experiences, a secretary in a gray accounting firm who, against all odds, has a love story with a soap opera star, came up with a full version at the Haifa Theater, starring Tali Oren, Miki Kam and Amir Hillel .
The musical became a cult, with a fan base that came time and time again to watch it.
He met Ran in 2007 through a mutual friend.
"For a year and a half we were on and off, I played with him. He terrified me terribly when he said to me: 'You are not a fling, you are for life.' Until then, I was only looking for sick beds. "In 2012, when I surprised him in New York. There we are considered married, not in Israel."
In the movie Ren says that he is strong among you, and that he must not break in front of you.
"Ran teaches that crying is a weakness, and I, perhaps because we are a family of weepers, taught that crying is liberating. I tell you that next to me he allows himself to be broken. We have a constant joke where I always say Sharan is the substance and I am the spirit - "Summarizes the essence of our relationship in one sentence. It's true that I am more liberating, more emotional. In half of the film about us, I seem to be crying."
"Ran and the Fans", Miri Perlman's documentary, will premiere on Wednesday at the Tel Aviv Cinematheque, in the presence of the director and his duo (and in the coming months will also air on Cellcom TV).
The film, shot alternately from 2013 to 2021, follows the couple, who repeatedly try to be parents and experience falls and crashes along the way.
Along with the despair and difficult moments, the work and music also stand out.
From the movie "Ren and Fans".
"Who knew we would go through such a path?", Photo: From the film
Ohad and Ren open their homes and hearts to the cameras, sharing the challenging journey - from finding the egg donor, the abortion that took place after she was already a surrogate, starting the process again with another surrogate until birth, and also the earthquake in Nepal where they found themselves with twins.
In the background watched their private childhood, no less complex.
"The original idea was to document the process of surrogacy, the wedding, the musical holiday with 'Billy Schwartz' and my third album, 'The Journey'. Who knew we would go through so much? "The abortion and the earthquake? And after all that, do you know what the most exciting scene for me in the film is? At the end, you jump a few years ahead at once - and see Oh and Berry as children in Israel."
• • •
In 2003, when he was 25, Hitman was diagnosed with lymph node cancer.
"I underwent chemotherapy and radiation treatments, and for a moment I recovered and saw the light. After six months I recorded the debut album - and one day before finishing work I was informed that the cancer had returned. Years. "
The Nepal experience and surrogacy, which received media coverage in real time, he mentions alongside the fight against cancer and "a few more disproportionate things I went through in my life" - including coming out of the closet.
"My departure, at the age of 24, was quite traumatic. In front of my parents it was difficult. There were shouts, and they got it not easy, although I'm sure they were not surprised. I remember that encounter as very charged. Today I feel sorry for them, but do not forgive. When I think about it, in the end, it took me eight years to get my sexuality, and that's how long it took them to get me. "And during their visits to us, they go straight to the little ones. The connection between my and Ren's families is also crazy."
In the movie you say that if you could swallow a ball and become straight, you would do it.
"But I immediately add that then I did not have Ran. Yes, straights are easier to run in the world. Ran and I needed almost a million shekels for the surrogacy process, we are not considered married in the eyes of the establishment here, and there is humiliation in the constant need to correct forms. To "the name of the father."
We're in 2021. There is, however, a change, including in the field of surrogacy in Israel for same-sex couples.
"Government and decisions of the High Court are important, but there is something more significant in my eyes: the change that is already being seen on the ground.
We have a religious friend who asked us to tell her children how Berry and Eva came into the world.
She explained to me that she was educating them to Judaism, and Judaism is tolerance and listening.
I think Judaism is also moving forward in the end. "
Hitman is also making progress, and is already thinking about the next challenges.
"After the piano festival I will continue to work with the show's musical producers, Tom Goldstein and Shavit Drummer, on my next album. I'm not resting. I go crazy at rest. My thoughts are also unbearable. I always feel like I'm still the gracious and unacceptable kid.
"This week I was at Thelma Yellin. I was invited from the theater department, which will present 'Billy Schwartz' this year. When I studied jazz with Thelma Yellin, I admired the theater students. They were like the cool ones, and most of them did not refer to me.
"So at first I thought, 'Here I go back to my high school as a winner, but I opened the conversation with the students by telling stories about my failures, to empower them. The part of going back and proving to those who abused me that I was more successful was not there. What makes me good is to do good to others. "
What's the next big dream?
"To conquer Tony, to be admired for my musical. But even if I win - I know I'm still not happy."
Classic Polish.
"Classic Polish, and also classic sick. I grew up in the Polish place where you have to be 'the best', and when I was not the best - I would go into depression. It's an exhausting place. Today I do not compete with people for first place. I surround myself with people who are first place."
It is impossible to end without asking what the "fans" mean.
"Before my cancer came back, a numerologist told me to add the letter Y to my name, because it would change my luck. There was another rabbi who told me this, and I ignored them both. ? '
"I answered 'yes', and that's what she wrote. My official name now is Harush Hitman fans. I am a fan of everyone, and only when a minister is angry with me does he call me a fan."
Maya19.10@gmail.com
