Beaten Woman Syndrome: "I've heard it said before: if she goes back, it's because she likes it"

"I'm really ashamed of what I did and it's complicated to move forward because of that".

The voice of Valérie Bacot starts at first cautiously, holding back sobs as she walks on her journey as a victim of violence.

An ordeal that begins in childhood in a family supposed to protect her.

Reassured by the presence of her lawyer, Me Nathalie Tomasini, and the benevolent words of the president of the delegation for women's rights, Annick Billon, the mother unties herself, stands more upright and her words are more assured.

This Thursday, the one who was convicted on June 25, 2021 of the assassination of her violent husband, gave the Senate the chilling account of the many obstacles she encountered (as well as her children) simply to ask for help .

In vain.

“You have been betrayed by your family (…), the State has failed to protect you, the institution too,” admits Annick Billon.

But above all, Valérie Bacot spoke of the future and the battles she now plans to lead.

A syndrome recognized since 1990 in Canada

His hobbyhorse: recognition in law, and in society, of battered woman syndrome (SFB). Or, a state of control linked to the repetition of violence which alters discernment and attested by psychiatry. For the first time, during the trial of Valérie Bacot, this syndrome was written down in full by a psychiatrist in a forensic expert report. It’s historic. If this is a first in France, this is not the case in Canada, for example, where it has been recognized since 1990. This concept had in fact been validated by the Canadian Supreme Court in the case of spousal homicide. under very similar conditions, the Angélique Lavallée affair.

At the end of a trial which lasted five days, the Assize Court of Saône-et-Loire sentenced Valérie Bacot to four years in prison, three of which were suspended, for having killed her husband with a bullet in the neck. .

Daniel Polette, known as "Dany", was her ex-father-in-law, the father of her four children, the man who raped, threatened, isolated, controlled, married, prostituted, beaten her for nearly twenty-five years. .

This judgment allowed her not to be reincarcerated, because of the year she had already spent in pre-trial detention.

To read also "I was an object": Valérie Bacot, this woman who risks the prison for having killed her executioner

“This syndrome exists but people find it difficult to understand it.

My goal is to change that, ”asserts Valérie Bacot.

"I want to explain it to people who experience it and do not realize it", she specifies, but also to the population as a whole and to whom it escapes.

“I've heard people say: if she goes back, she likes it.

It's very complicated to take, ”she explains to the senators present, as well as to the only senator who made the trip to hear her, Michel Boughri.

"I always fold the laundry like he wanted me to do, I'm still watching behind me…"

The (mixed) delegation for Women's Rights is responsible for informing the Senate of the policy followed by the government with regard to its consequences on women's rights and on equal opportunities between men and women. In this area, it monitors the application of laws. It can also be referred to a bill or a private member's bill. This is why Valérie Bacot was auditioned on the theme of violence against women. To help the legislator.

On this point, "we have been working for seven years to change the legislation," blows Senator LR, Valérie Boyer, member of the delegation. In particular, she tried to pass an amendment introducing the fact that "domestic violence, which causes certain trauma on the victims, must systematically be taken into account as a cause of criminal irresponsibility". The amendment tabled within the framework of the examination of a bill on penal irresponsibility, had been rejected by the Minister of Justice, Eric Dupond-Moretti, who likened it to "a license to kill".

When we talk about "battered woman syndrome" or "battered person" we are talking about victims.

Let’s never forget that.

Even if the Senate rejects my proposal today, I will not give up.

Yesterday Valérie Bacot and tomorrow?

# DirectSénat pic.twitter.com/dd3dyfu4Wg

- Valérie Boyer (@ valerieboyer13) October 19, 2021

This battered woman syndrome, Valérie Bacot says to suffer it again. “I kept some habits from the time I was with him. I always fold the laundry as he wanted me to do, I still watch behind me… I move in the present, I think about the future but inside I live in the past. It was only at the time of the trial that she became aware. "I understand today this hold that eats you up but at that time, I had the feeling that if he got angry it was because of me. I programmed myself to act in such a way that he didn't mistreat me and hurt children, ”she says.

In France, spousal homicides remain predominantly committed by men, who represent 82% of perpetrators of feminicides in 2020. Among women perpetrators, half of them had already been victims of violence by their partner, some having already reported the facts to the police, according to data from the Ministry of the Interior.