10 actions that are also violence against women

5 revealing facts about violence against women 1:25

(CNN Spanish) -

Your partner told you that he wanted to have the password to your Instagram account because there are no secrets between you.

You reconnected with your friends after months without seeing them and you spent the night answering their messages, because you know they don't like it when you delay in answering.

He constantly accuses you of cheating on him.

It never occurred to you to think that you are in a violent relationship.

Maybe you do recognize that your boyfriend is jealous, but violence?

What is a violent relationship going to be like if there is no hitting, kicking or punching?

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Identifying and admitting that a relationship is violent can be very difficult.

First of all, you must remember that violence is not just blows.

Abuse manifests itself in multiple ways besides physical: it can be emotional, psychological or economic, among others.

In fact, the UN defines violence against women as "any act of gender violence that results, or may result in physical, sexual or psychological harm to women, including threats of such acts, coercion or deprivation arbitrary freedom, whether they occur in public or private life ".

Here are 10 actions that, although sometimes they may not seem like it, are recognized as signs of abuse in a relationship by institutions such as the United Nations, the United States Department of Health and Human Services, and the Mayo Clinic.

1 - Control where and with whom you are all the time

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An abusive partner wants to know at all times where you are, with whom and what you are doing.

And he wants you to respond to his messages and calls immediately.

2 - Demand to know your passwords

Demand access to your social media accounts, your email and your phone.

He checks them without your permission.

3 - Make decisions for you

Decide for you things like what you should eat, how you should dress or what you should spend your money on.

4 - You never know what can happen next

Their attitudes are unpredictable.

You never know what will cause a problem, when anger will flare up.

And, once it breaks out, it holds you responsible for its outbursts.

That can lead you, for example, to avoid doing anything that you think might make him angry or cause conflict.

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5 - Control your method of contraception

Seek to control the contraceptive methods you use and even the instances in which you go to the doctor.

6 - Discourage you to study or work

An abusive partner isolates you from your environment.

He does not want you to see your family or friends, study or work.

It directly prevents you or discourages you.

7 - Denigrates you

He belittles you by attacking the way you look, your interests, or your intelligence.

He humiliates you, ridicules you, makes fun of you when they are with other people.

These types of attitudes constitute emotional abuse that undermines your self-esteem.

8 - Threatens to hurt others and even himself

He may never have hit you, but he does threaten to hurt you, loved ones, or himself.

Threatens to injure children in the house and even pets.

Destroy objects that you are fond of.

9 - He accuses you of being unfaithful

He constantly accuses you, and unjustifiably, that you are cheating on him.

Act in a jealous and possessive manner.

You can hear phrases like "if I can't have you, then no one can."

10 - Forces you to have sex

It forces you to have sex even if you don't want to.

Assume, for example, that because you wanted to engage in sexual activity in the past, you must do it again in the future.

If he forces you to participate in a sexual act without your consent, it is sexual abuse.

3 actions you can take in the face of an abusive relationship

What can you do if you are in an abusive relationship?

Here are some tips that the aforementioned institutions highlight and that can help you face this situation:

1 - Share what happens to you

Tell what is happening to a trusted person, for example a family member or friend.

You can also contact the domestic violence hotlines in your country.

2 - Use electronic devices with caution

An abusive partner can check your messages, call history, the pages you visit on the Internet.

Use your phone and computer with caution: change passwords frequently, delete histories, disable GPS.

Of course: always try to have a phone with charge and have identified who you can call in case you need help.

3 - Have a plan to escape in case it is necessary

It is important that you have a plan in place in case the violence escalates and you have to leave your home quickly.

Katie Ray-Jones, executive director of the US National Domestic Violence Hotline, explained to CNN what a 12-step "safety plan" should look like that includes, among other actions, thinking about credible reasons to leave your home. and practice how to do it safely if possible.

You can read all the recommendations here.

How to act if you identify situations of violence against women in your environment

If you identify that a friend, relative or neighbor is in an abusive relationship, you can help her. In these cases, the UN recommends that, first and foremost, you keep in touch with that person in the way that works best for them. Listen carefully and give your support, but always respecting the privacy of the person who decided to share with you what is happening and their resolutions. This means that, unless you seriously consider that their life is in danger, you should not make decisions without their consent. And, if you can, make available practical resources that can help her in case of need, such as a place to stay or transportation to get away from home.

You may think that violence against women is a very distant reality.

That does not happen in your family, in your neighborhood, in your city, in your country.

Yet violence against women happens around the world every day.

According to the WHO, "one in three women worldwide has experienced physical or sexual violence, mainly at the hands of her partner."

And the consequences are devastating.

Violence against women