Screenshot (Photo: Instagram)

If she really had it all, Miss USA would not have committed suicide at the age of 31

"I can not explain to you how many times I deleted from my social media pages comments with emoji vomiting," says Miss USA in a recent interview she gave before her tragic death by jumping out of the window of her luxury apartment, due to severe depression and low self-esteem.

This sad story is the story of many women

Anat Nissani

13/02/2022

13/02/2022

• Share on Facebook

• Share on WhatsApp

• Share on Twitter

• Share on Email

• Share on general

• Comments

  Comments

Miss Universe Summary (NOW Shira Bar)

It has been almost two weeks since Sunday morning when the body of Chesley Christ, former Miss USA, was found, and the American and global media are unable to let go of the issue.

The story of the beautiful, educated, successful young woman, the one who had everything but probably felt she had nothing, is a heartbreaking tragedy in itself, but is also a bigger story that paints a very sad picture of the reality in which we live.

Christ, who was elected Miss USA in 2019, was a lawyer and reporter on an entertainment program.

She lived on the ninth floor of a 60-story luxury tower in New York, traveled all over the world and arrived in Eilat last December, as part of the broadcast team of the last Miss Universe pageant.

She was 30, full of charisma and personality, with hundreds of thousands of followers on social media, but her external impression was probably completely different from what was happening inside her.

She was last seen around 7 a.m. that Sunday, on the 29th floor balcony of the building where she lived.

Shortly afterwards she jumped from the same porch to her death.

Christ left a letter in her apartment, in which she transfers all her property to her mother (who was Miss North Carolina and a candidate in the Miss USA pageant herself), but did not add explanations for her actions.

On several occasions, however, she said that since winning, she has dealt with many cases of cyberbullying.

More on Walla!

You will not believe what socks and cloth can do to her orgasm

To the full article

More on Walla!

• Photographed her body every day of the week - watch the amazing size differences

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Cheslie Kryst, JD, MBA (@chesliekryst)

As the oldest woman in history to win the title of Miss USA - at the extreme age of 28 - Christ heard immediately after her win that fans of the pageant were protesting her choice, demanding to lower the maximum age threshold for entry into the pageant.

In addition, she has suffered a host of insults about her skin color, her curly hair and her muscular body structure, and many have claimed that she was chosen not because of her beauty but only for reasons of diversity.

"I can not explain to you how many times I deleted from my social media pages comments with vomiting emojis and insults that tell me I'm not pretty enough to be Miss USA or that my body shape is a man's body shape," she wrote in an article in Allure magazine in early March. Just before her 30th birthday and almost a year before she decided to end her life.

In the same article she also describes, no less disturbingly, her feelings towards the age of 30. She says that her age is a cold reminder that her relevance to society is disappearing, that she is in a race against time and fails to meet outside expectations, and that society has never treated people aging , Especially for women.

Following the publication of the news of her death, a journalist named Maureen Callahan published an opinion piece in the New York Post, in which she accused cyberbullying of her death and claimed that although it is already known that using social media can cause heavy psychological damage, no one is doing anything to stop it.

She called for treating social networks like the big tobacco companies - condemning them, suing them for the damage they cause and enacting regulations that would restrict their use for public health.

To try to understand how a woman who has seemingly everything comes to such great distress and how it relates to social media and our increased preoccupation with appearance, I decided to turn to Dr. Ilan Rabinovich, a specialist psychiatrist and psychotherapist.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Cheslie Kryst, JD, MBA (@chesliekryst)

"The first thing to ask is why women today still go to beauty pageants," he says. "Women who come to the beauty pageant are mostly women who need recognition or a seal on their femininity and appearance, because maybe they themselves do not believe in it and need reinforcements."

Although beauty pageants are no longer what they used to be, they can still be fun and even serve the participants, provided they come with a sporty approach, for the experience, when they are complete with their looks and understand that it's all about the game.

But whoever sees the results of the competition and the reactions she receives his approval she needs, and comes in the first place from a place of insecurity and a desire for recognition, for which participation can be devastating.

"There is no doubt that a girl who takes her life at the age of 30 when she consciously jumps to 29th place is in very serious distress," says Dr. Rabinovich. To her crown.

The problem was that she probably did not feel that way.

Because if she had felt that way she would not have been so hurt by the reactions and the talkbacks.

Many times there is no fit between a person's objective qualities and the way he sees himself.

Objectively he may have the whole package, but he does not feel that way, and the greater the gap between objective reality and personal feeling, the more emptiness is created, and a very great mental suffering is created. "

"In successful people, success usually comes from some kind of deprivation, subjective or objective, that creates low self-confidence and the need for lots of warmth, love and attention to feel equal and existent. I have been caring for lots of successful people from all fields for 25 years, Their drive, totality and excellence, is the same deprivation for which they are also very sensitive. "It doesn't matter what his title is. Even when he reaches the top and everyone recognizes his value, he does not always recognize it himself."

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Cheslie Kryst, JD, MBA (@chesliekryst)

The psychological damage caused by the use of social networks is not the exclusive domain of celebrities, who are the focus of public attention and face vicious talkbacks.

Our very daily and relentless preoccupation with appearance, external image and incessant comparisons to others can lead to similar gaps in self-perception, and reaching a beauty pageant on the scale of Miss USA that exposes the candidacy to the public may make the contestant a target for talkbackers hiding behind anonymity. Venom, evil, hatred, jealousy or frustration.

The discourse about the role of social networks in preventing bullying is far from over, and certainly not helpful for one of the most disturbing phenomena in the field of body image - dysmorphic body disorder.

A person suffering from dysmorphia will see certain characteristics in his appearance as defects, and this will disturb him to the point of self-loathing, avoiding contact with people and more.

Absurdly, many of the people with the disorder are actually people with an attractive external appearance, as their appearance receives more attention from the environment, and although it is a positive attitude, they feel examined with a magnifying glass.

The problem is that today, in the age of social media, not only women like Miss USA are under constant scrutiny - we are all constantly examining the appearance and external image of ourselves and others.

Today it is more common for people to perceive themselves in a distorted way even though they have no reason to be ashamed of their appearance?

"It happens a lot more because the metrics are incorrect. The reference threshold is incorrect. For today's young people, and I'm talking about ages 10 to 30-40, it's much harder than it was in my generation. It starts with children from age 7 already having a smartphone and watching content. Pornographic and their whole body image and attitude towards sexuality becomes distorted.The second thing that happens is that networks, especially Instagram, have made visibility a top value, but what we see there are filters, unrealistic proportions, unrealistic references and a bar that is not human at all. And women are in very difficult disadvantages and I see patients being hurt every day as a result. That exist today in hundreds of percent more than it did 15 years ago. "

To mental difficulties is often added an equally destructive dimension - concealment.

In Christ's case, outwardly she maintained a classy image as expected of any beauty queen, and did not share her feelings even with those closest to her.

"She led a public and private life," her mother said after her death, "in her private life she dealt with high-functioning depression which she hid from everyone, including me, until a very short time before her death."

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Cheslie Kryst, JD, MBA (@chesliekryst)

"It may be that the title of beauty queen, which obliges the wearer to present flawless integrity, weighed on her and made it difficult for her to show weakness, so she was afraid to even tell her family that she was in serious distress," Dr. Rabinovich explains, "but people who hide depression Their suffer much more than those who share and externalize it.

The concealment comes at a very heavy price, as we see in this case, when she simply reached a point where she could no longer bear it.

" rest and peace ", a deliberate choice of words, presumably, alluding to the phrase" Rest in Peace ", which is said of a person who has passed away.

"In the same place where she was ridiculed, she says goodbye, and says that in another world she may have peace and quiet," Dr. Rabinovich explains. "No one has returned from death. Our believe in eternal life.

We do not really know, and what happened is terribly sad.

There is graffiti that says that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and it is true - any such mental problem can be solved, probably today

2022.

" Rabinovich.

Every beautiful woman will have a more beautiful woman, every successful woman will have a more successful woman and every educated man will have - you understand.

The expectation of being the "best" there is, in any field, only puts us in an endless and unnecessary loop and intensifies the hard feelings.

"We need to stop measuring and rating, start living and enjoying the moment, and treat likes and followers as a tool, not as a target," concludes Dr. Rabinovich. Vaccinated against hard feelings.

"If there is distress, no matter what the cause and sometimes it is also without a cause, it is important to seek treatment and help because the mental suffering is terrible, and without proper treatment it can end in disaster."

• Sheee

• Sheee-talk

Tags

• miss Universe

• women

• Beauty

• expression

• depression

• Instagram

• Social Networks