Heard speaks for the first time after trial against Depp 1:13
(CNN) --
Amber Heard is afraid of being sued again by ex-husband Johnny Depp, though she admits she still loves him.
That was revealed in the second part of Heard's exclusive interview with NBC News' Savannah Guthrie, Heard's first since her and Depp's high-profile libel trial.
The actress said "absolutely" when asked by Gutherie if, after all, as she said in court during her libel trial, "she still has love" for Depp.
"I love him. I loved him with all my heart," Heard said.
"And I tried my best to make a deeply broken relationship work, and I couldn't."
Amber Heard assures that she will keep the testimony against Johnny Depp until the "day of her death"
"I have no ill feelings or ill will towards him at all," he added.
"I know that can be hard to understand or it can be very easy to understand if you've ever loved someone."
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In the first part of the interview, which aired on Tuesday, Amber Heard said she believed "the vast majority of this trial took place on social media" and spoke of the insults she received from Depp supporters.
In Wednesday's segment, Heard reflected further on the public's perception of her, after being asked by Gutherie about a text in which Depp promised "total worldwide humiliation" for her.
"I'm not a good victim, I get it," he said.
"I'm not a sympathetic victim, I'm not a perfect victim. But when I testified I asked the jury to look at me and hear their own words, which is a promise to do this."
Depp sued Heard for $50 million, claiming she defamed him in a 2018 Washington Post op-ed in which he wrote about his experience with domestic violence, though he was not mentioned by name.
Why does Johnny Depp think he won?
His lawyers talk about the ruling 0:41
She countersued him for $100 million and both were found liable for defamation, although the jury awarded Depp significantly more damages.
Heard told Guthrie that she "took it for granted that she had a right to speak" and is now nervous about doing so.
"I'm afraid that whatever I do, say what I say and say it however I say it, every step I take is going to be another opportunity for this kind of silencing," Amber Heard said in response to Guthrie's question of whether she was concerned. that Depp could sue her again in the future.
"Which is what I suppose he intends in a defamation lawsuit: to take your voice away."
As for the "Aquaman" star's future, she said she can now focus on being a full-time mom to her one-year-old daughter.
Amber Heard Johnny Depp
