I don't remember what year it was or how old I was myself, 11 or 12, but it was summer.
One of those afternoons of deadly boredom and hellish heat, spread-eagled reading on the top bunk of the girls' room while my sister snored on the bottom one and my parents took a nap in the adjoining bedroom under the threat of punishing us without a beach if we bothered them.
What I do remember, exactly, is what I read.
East of Eden / The Pearl
, by John Steinbeck, a 900-page tochazo that I had commissioned from my father in the order of the quarter of the Círculo de Lectores.
I chose it because of the photo of James Dean on the cover, it must be said, but the fact is that the story hooked me and I was drinking the soap opera like horchata when, suddenly, with a certain passage, I noticed extraordinary ardor in salvos, whatever the parts and, I don't know, call it X, my fever resolved with no more intervention on my part than to continue reading quickly, leaving me both satiated and hungry.
Then I perfected the technique, of course, but the ban had been opened once and for all.
Of course, I didn't tell my parents or my siblings or my friends about the news.
No one needed to explain anything to me;
I just opened my ears and connected the dots, but,
Like me, in due time, millions of girls and boys will have their particular fall from the pony this summer without that milestone having to entail, at all, the loss of their innocence.
The aversion of some to being talked about to the kids, apart from being irresponsible, confirms that for them onanism is something dirty, indecent, a sin of impure acts, while their children, and those of the neighbor, watch wild porn behind their backs with the mobile in one hand and the other in the other.
By the way, when we built my parents' house after their death, I took the car book to mine.
I have it stored on the bedside table like a Satisfyer in a cover.
At this point self love bores me to death.
But, in a hurry, I always have it on hand.
Each one is eroticized as she wants.
And how can she
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