Screenshot (Photo: from "Wedding at First Sight")

Had Ben and Maayan tried a little Nida: the importance of distance

If Cinderella had taken all the brides in a "wedding" for pre-wedding bridal training, the main issue she would have delayed was figuring out how to use the distance to encourage closeness and intimacy.

Ruthie Leviev solves the couple's marital problems

Ruthie Leviev Yelizarov

01/07/2022

01/07/2022

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We signed with Mano Cohen and Liron Paz (Sheee system)

If Cinderella had existed, she would probably have taken all the brides in "bridesmaids" for bridal guidance before the wedding, and the prince would have done tutorials for the grooms, and the main issue they would dwell on is understanding how distance from each other eventually creates intimate intimacy.

Must fight (Photo: screenshot, from "Wedding at First Sight")

Katya and Lior: Succeed because of the distance, but have to fight

Before the couples' weekend, Katya is nervous because she does not want to come to the meeting while Lior continues to please her and tell her how much he loves her because he really wants to come to this meeting. But that sweetness will not mislead you. Katya's buds of opposition to Lior. She feels that something is wrong with him, not real, that he makes too many decisions for her without asking her - as if he lives in his own world and she only has to blame them for a box.

If it leads to a quarrel .

Between them that will make them let go and say what they really think about this whole relationship, that would be great. Even if you are a hitmaker.

By the way, later on he also tells the other grooms that he won the whole box office because Katya is a doctor.

So it is possible that his love for her stems from what she is and not from who she is.

The problem with Lior is that he is a bit selfish and childish who lives in some kind of legend that he is a prince who met a blonde princess and a doctor and he navigates the relationship according to his needs without considering how Katya sees this relationship.

This relationship is successful so far, mainly because Katya and Lior live in constant physical distance.

By virtue of her role as a physician, Katya does shifts in a hospital two to three nights a week, which means that for half a week they do not meet at all.

He does claim that her long shifts can be difficult, but he does not really mean it - the farther she is, the more he has a reason to miss, to love, to want to get closer, and maybe that's even why she so quickly decided she's the woman of his life.

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Maayan and Ben: He walks away because she's exaggerating

On the other side of the scale, Maayan works too hard, raising a white birthday production that does not embarrass a silver wedding.

She bought him presents, cool shirts, made him a cake, decorated the apartment for him and closed a suite for them in a luxury hotel.

But when Ben came into the house and saw everything she had done for him, he made a face.

No doubt he is afraid that Maayan is falling in love with him and he tells the camera that he is not "closed on her", and makes her talk about the gap between them because she is not his "tapecast", especially in the context of her external form.

Now I'll tell you a secret.

For a man, tension and conquest are important, even more so than the outward form.

A girl can be a supermodel, but if she is taken for granted and 'strained' in the first place, it will bring down the man.

Remember the Cinderella story.

The prince preferred her because she gave him a reason to work hard for her - that's how a man's head works.

If I could whisper in Maayan's ear, I'd tell her not to strain for Ben.

Buy him a really small gift and let him understand that he has to make an effort to conquer her heart, even if it is most in his interest.

Later, in preparation for the couple's meeting, they come to Danny and Ben says that Maayan will not cut off his relationship with him in life, even if he is addicted to a lemon waffle.

But as soon as Maayan raised in front of Danny the doubts she had towards Ben, it made him approach her and stop taking her for granted.

Not ready to be taken for granted (Photo: screenshot, from "Wedding at First Sight")

May and Moshe: Challenge lovers

May do it a little differently.

She puts up a large stop sign for her partner, Moshe, so that he understands that he has to work very hard to conquer her heart, because she is not self-evident.

She puts Ray her dog in their relationship to Moshe's displeasure, she puts on her alarm clocks, when Moshe offers her to go for a walk in Rabin Square she wants to hang out somewhere else at all.

When they go to eat hummus in Jaffa, Moshe gathers inside himself and she hints that it is worth returning home, then laughs at him on the fourth hair removal roller he bought.

Moshe is offended, defensive, upset by the cancellation of Rabin Square, speaks aggressively to her and also tells her the sentence that every man has in his arsenal, ready to pull out: "I need time."

But May wants to stay the way she is and not want anyone.

They are many, and finally when she cries he hugs her, because that is what he has been waiting for four episodes.

That something would break in this unwilling woman, that he would be able to touch her heart with the help of a warm hug.

The solution: the Cinderella effect

The situations in which the couples in the program 'fall' are constantly familiar to me as a relationship counselor, because one of the painful issues that many couples complain about is lack of excitement, a weakening passion that makes the couple bored.

I want to dwell on this, especially when in this program, the couples have not gone through a courtship process, which is essential for the beginning of a relationship, and the courtship happens during the relationship that has been forged between them.

Remember, Cinderella was "hard to get" for the prince.

She danced with him a whole evening and in the end ran away from him without leaving a single thread end like an address or a name.

He had gone mad from searching for her, and by the time he found her, he was already convinced that she was his one and only.

This is a simple wisdom that has accompanied humanity since the dawn of history, and it is fitting that the couples in "Khatunmi" should adopt it as well.

• Sheee

• Sex and relationships

Tags

• A wedding at first sight

• Went

• Nida