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No penetration required: The changes that need to be made in the approach to sex

The fact that human sex is imperfect and requires a lot of changes and corrections is not a new thing, but it turns out that after years of talking and trying, there is no such thing as "too many explanations and clarifications".

So here are some more explanations.

And clarifications.

Karin Arad

17/07/2022

17/07/2022

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Let's face it, there are many things that require correction in sex, and in relationships in general.

One can talk about the monogamy becoming irrelevant but we have no idea what to do without it, one can talk until tomorrow about the self-worth of some people, which depends entirely on how much they feel coveted by the partner, and one can endlessly lull about the crooked body image we all have.

But this has been a job for psychologists, or in some cases for Scientologists.

But we are not completely helpless - before we move on to addressing fundamental issues, we should start with a few small things that have long had no place in our sex and relationship lives.

As part of a weeks patch, here are five that must happen in bed, and soon:

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Every sexual act is sex.

A hot kiss is also sex (Photo: ShutterStock)

Women must learn to initiate

Yes, of course you are an initiator, I'm talking about all the other women, who in a relationship are always waiting for him to initiate the daily sex, and half the times also refuse.

Although there are sometimes gaps between female and male libido, so it happens in many couples that because he initiates every day, she just does not develop enough desire, but even in the first sex the initiative is usually his, and it is a pity.

First of all, because they too are having a hard time taking the first step and will be happy for some help, secondly, because it's sexy, and thirdly - because everything between men and women should be more mutual.

So women need to initiate much more, and men need to release the occupation instinct and let it do the work occasionally.

It takes patience, but it pays off.

What is defined as "sexy" does vary according to periods and cultures, but in the end sexual attraction is an animalistic and very basic instinct that feels the same for all of us, and is powerful and unadulterated.

A move of temptation, to work, and not look ridiculous, sleazy, and do the opposite effect - must be completely authentic, otherwise it will not work.

For example, Dirty Talk who does not sit well on who is talking to him, or on the type of relationship.

Lots of men think poor correspondence on Tinder and a drop of light-hearted flirtation are a green light for sleazy sayings that no one does.

Believe me - they're just creepy.

And speaking of which, even the ancient seduction techniques that women still use no longer work for anyone - it's much more tempting for him to understand from your behavior that you really, really care about him, than for ridiculous poses with baby dolls and point legs.

In resuscitation, well.

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Men sometimes fake too (Photo: ShutterStock)

Men - not what we thought

For some reason we are used to seeing men as oiled erection machines, whose brains are only secondary to the sex drive, and even though we ourselves most understand when sometimes we do not feel like it, if God forbid a man does not feel like having sex, it is Harbo Darb.

It is so unacceptable that he will feel uncomfortable admitting and having sex without desire, if she knows he does not come to him most of the time she will be so offended that it will lead to a childish and unnecessary quarrel that she has gained two kilos, and many generic sentences with the word "once" will be said.

No wonder men also started faking orgasms.

Yes, they fake when they no longer feel like it and they want it to end, just like us.

With a condom it is really simple, and even without a condom it is not really complicated to take credit for the existing fluids.

Women, do not stress - whether he is horny about you right now or not is not the only indication of anything - not even the fact that you are an attractive woman.

And it's easy to prove it - it requires a slight entanglement in front of a foreign man, or, for courage, the development of confidence unrelated to appearance.

Such a utopia.

Ummm, what's the connection?

For some reason this equation was fixed - be a good boy, have sex tonight, be a maniac - sleep on the couch.

First of all, goodbye to the sixties and the white picket fence. Second thing, sorry - you do not want to sleep with him, do not sleep with him. A birthday is neither a gift nor a reward. If oral sex does not come naturally to you in every act, at least do not be careless and suck (bad) only on birthdays and holidays. No matter how many times it reminds you of Labrador,

The prevailing understanding (in the serial world at least) is that sex that has not had penetration is "not really" sex.

Surprisingly, this technical explanation even gets people out of trouble: "We got a little horny, but there was no intrusion."

So let's close this corner.

If you were naked in bed and did everything but penetrate - it's sex.

Even if you were half-dressed it could be considered sex, and in fact any sexual act is sex.

Even a hot kiss is sex, breastfeeding is sex, blowjob is sex.

Just as bad sex can not be considered as if it never happened (unfortunately for many), so the lack of penetration is irrelevant to the issue.

And the most important thing to say about penetration is that if you are not so obsessed with penetration and understand that it's sex too, you will improve your sex life dramatically, especially if you are women.

• Sheee

• Sex and relationships

Tags

• sex

• romanticism

• relations

• Love

• Relationships