Helicopter Parents: Children Become "Weak Personalities"
Created: 07/26/2022, 12:00 p.m
By: Judith Brown
Children should be raised to be strong personalities.
However, an overprotective upbringing harms their development.
The parenting style of so-called helicopter parents is characterized by overprotection.
They buzz around the little ones like helicopters so that nothing negative happens to their offspring.
However, they also do this in situations where such behavior is not appropriate and where their children could learn and grow.
This robs them of important experience.
The consequences of such upbringing can last into adulthood.
The social, educational and health researcher Prof. Klaus Hurrelmann explains why this behavior is becoming more common among parents these days and how it can affect children's personalities.
Helicopter Parents: Children Become "Weak Personalities"
Overprotective parents raise their children to be "weak personalities," warns an educational researcher.
(Icon image) © Cavan Images/IMAGO
Children today are exposed to an overprotective upbringing style and at the same time a high level of pressure from their parents to perform, Hurrelmann told
Focus Online.
Helicopter parents, for example, find it difficult to let go, so they do not give the children enough space to experience things themselves.
"They are too close to their child and should actually take a step back," explains the scientist.
As a result, children become defiant, abandoning and quitting tasks to avoid frustration.
According to Hurrelmann, another mistake that parents often make is that they see themselves as the child's partner and do everything together with them.
"The child cannot learn to stand on its own two feet and it cannot then learn to deal with disappointment in an appropriate way." An example of this is when parents take over the homework for their child because, for example, in the lessons hard to keep up with.
Or the parents put a lot of effort into helping them get the chores done, and yet the child brings home bad work after bad work.
For the children this is unbearable and difficult to endure.
"Because the mother or father worked so intensively with them and yet nothing came of it," says the researcher.
Parents unknowingly put pressure on their child and have high expectations of their protégés because of the parents' strong interference.
This behavior, in turn, puts a strain on the child.
“And it prevents the child from daring to make a mistake and admit it.
Many feel that they cannot afford to make a mistake or they could hurt and disappoint their parents.”
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Education researchers warn of the consequences of overprotective upbringing
According to the expert, the reason for such behavior of parents lies in irrational fears.
Parents sense the insecurity in society, says Hurrelmann.
They become so involved because they believe that danger is lurking around every corner and that they must protect their child.
However, this does not correspond to reality and is against all reason and rationality: "In reality, fewer and fewer attacks are happening every day, the risk of being involved in an accident is very small, and violence on the streets in general has decreased."
The consequences of an overprotective upbringing style and the prognosis for the future of the little ones are fatal.
"If children never learn to accept disappointments or setbacks, they become weak personalities," says Hurrelmann.
Children should be allowed to take risks that are appropriate to their age.
Only then could they become viable.
The professor sees the solution to the problem in parent training courses, which take away their fear of failure.
In addition, raising certain types of parents can also promote negative thought patterns in adulthood.
This article only contains general information on the respective health topic and is therefore not intended for self-diagnosis, treatment or medication. In no way does it replace a visit to the doctor. Unfortunately, our editors are not allowed to answer individual questions about clinical pictures.