The poor friend's ugly shoes

Youth precariousness is usually presented as a compact whole, but the young people among them will not end up being the same.

The networks burned when it was published this week that there is a wealth gap between 20 and 30 years, where differences in salary break friendships that cannot afford the same standard of living.

Although it is cynical to believe that youth stratification begins with payroll, and not social class or parental privilege.

Serve the time when a friend from a wealthy background asked me "how a child could be aware of his humble reality" in front of other classmates.

She cited sharing a room with siblings, or not having books at home.

But it is difficult to know how small a brake this will imply on their academic performance or their opportunities.

I took a more innocent image from my childhood: the girls wearing designer sneakers, in front of mine, not so sophisticated, within the possibilities of my family.

Ugly sneakers thus constitute a metaphor for the subtle, yet identifiable, differences that exist when it comes to building social relationships and that accompany us throughout life.

Inequality is material, belongings, money or facilities.

But its implications are also psychological, as a source of self-esteem that forges group identities or imaginaries.

Inequality even translates into a social liturgy, an aesthetic, habits that unite those who recognize themselves as equals.

Therefore, it would be hypocritical to be scandalized by a break in ties at the age of 30 between those friends who can no longer go to fine restaurants or on weekends.

When, from the outset, there are friends we never made, environments we will never frequent, due to economic status.

Maybe we didn't live in his neighborhood or attend his school, or we didn't play the piano;

they won't invite us to their parties either, and we rarely travel together on vacation.

However, life shuffles the cards, allowing a large group to mix later due to their hobbies and affinities, a change of city or job.

The chosen environments then end up forging a false appearance of egalitarianism.

The problem comes when we appreciate, again, that young people will share a similar culture, or common generational dramas, but no, they are not all the same, even if they have attended the same institute or university gang.

In your thirties, you notice again the weight of other people's wealth;

They are the adult sneakers of the difference.

Another is the general difficulty of saving in Spain, while my friend's mother could loosen 100,000 euros for the down payment of a flat and others will inherit valuable real estate.

The gap between those who share a house with friends and those who have their own mortgage can condition their long-term life expectations, such as starting a family.

In your thirties, you also value the decisions you have been making;

They are the sneakers of the chosen difference.

Low wages are a constant in our country.

Now, you will never aspire to the same salary, from the outset, coming from a career as a computer scientist than having studied the humanities.

Some friends may feel guilty about how their financial situation is shaping their lives, pulling away, while others are looking for ways to cope.

In spite of everything, it would be a lamentable vision of human relationships to trust them only to money.

Empathy is precisely what unites people when they live together in the same space.

A sample is the towns or the middle neighborhoods, where interactions between classes are more common.

What kind of friend doesn't look for a way to integrate you, no matter how well it goes, if you can't have a coffee with him.

Namely: friendship can be communist, anti-capitalist and revolutionary, since affection is the noblest way of equalizing people of different birth or status.

Friendship can even help mitigate inequality, in the exchange of advice or information about the world between those who have different origins.

The poor friend's ugly slippers are there the metaphor that, under appearances, humanity is united more by its values, and its goodness of the soul.

That if one has had the joy of interacting with that other or is not an outright classist, it is clear.

Estefanía Molina

is a political scientist and journalist.

She is the author of

(Destiny).

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