Suddenly there are two wine glasses and a torso on the other side of the table.
A backlit silhouette in a sunset photo.
Another pair of feet in that precious snapshot on the beach.
And a stranger begins, little by little, to colonize the
feed
of one of our contacts on social networks.
There is not a sufficiently explicit message and the photos do not portray them in an affectionate attitude.
He can be a friend.
A friend with whom you often go out to dinner, with whom you go on trips, with whom you attend parties, watch sunsets and take romantic walks hand in hand.
This technique of shy introduction to the virtual world is what Americans call
soft launch boyfriend
.
The term went viral thanks to a monologue and tweet by comedian Rachel Sennott in the summer of 2020, and has been steadily gaining popularity ever since.
It is the transfer to the world of relationships of a
marketing technique:
the
soft launch
it is the presentation of a product in a limited and gradual way and can be translated into Spanish as a pilot or soft presentation.
Smooth presentation is a content strategy that makes sense, too, on social media.
It gradually introduces the followers to a new character in the narration that the users of these make of their lives.
It does so by minimizing the risk of introducing a love that may not be final.
In addition, it is a frivolous and entertaining strategy.
A way to give importance, to make people wonder: who is this new person?
More information
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“I think it is the most used way to introduce potential couples on social networks, while you are assessing whether the relationship will go forward or not,” explains couples psychologist Lorenlay Fraile.
"I myself have done it in my last relationship without knowing that it had a name," she admits.
Perhaps that is why the term has been so well received, because it christens a trend that everyone has assumed naturally and subconsciously.
“In the age of Instagram, starting a new relationship involves crafting a public relations strategy,” an article in The Atlantic
magazine wryly explained
last year.
Introducing a partner in society can be stressful.
"It makes you look exposed, vulnerable and you get
feedback
about the person you're with," says Fraile.
It is a step that serves to strengthen a relationship, but also to test it.
And this process, which used to be done completely analogically, has in recent years also been transferred to the digital environment.
That is why strategies have been developed to cushion the importance of that big step in any new couple.
One of the shock effects of Facebook in its first months of existence was to create a section in which the user had to specify whether or not he was in a relationship.
This detail was decisive in the success of the social network, as is well reflected in the film of the same name directed by David Fincher.
Whether it was to flirt or just to gossip, people turned out to be very interested in checking the relationship status of their contacts.
Facebook had —and has— different options to summarize something as complex as a relationship.
"Single" or "as a couple" were the two originals, although over the years alternatives have been added.
This reductionist binarism made the introduction of a couple something more definitive and official.
Seeing on the wall that a contact had changed their status from “single” to “in a relationship” (let alone the opposite) triggered a string of reactions and comments.
Continuing with the marketing simile, more than a soft or pilot presentation, it seemed like the presentation event of the new iPhone.
Social networks have changed a lot since then and also the way of presenting yourself in them.
Over the years, users have learned to count themselves, to control the narration of their love life.
And those who have best known how to do it are the famous.
Singer Jennifer Lopez, for example, revealed that she had resumed her relationship with actor Ben Affleck with a photo of the two kissing on a slideshow carousel on Instagram.
It is an official presentation, more similar to how things were done 20 years ago, when they first started dating.
The media Kourtney Kardashian, for her part, confirmed her romance with the musician Travis Barker with a close-up of their intertwined hands, more similar to a soft (and cheesy) presentation.
View this post on Instagram
A post shared by Jennifer Lopez (@jlo)
The soft introduction of the boyfriend or his official launch are decisive to understand the way in which a couple presents themselves in society and this, now that everyone has a small virtual loudspeaker, is not limited only to public figures.
"Social networks can mark a little the identity of a relationship and are sometimes a source of conflict," says psychologist Lorenlay Fraile.
The amount of information that the couple wants to share, to what extent they value their intimacy or if they even want to hide their relationship are determining aspects to calibrate the content that is going to be shown.
28% of social network users share or discuss aspects of their life as a couple or their dates, according to an analysis by Pew Research.
This percentage varies greatly according to age.
The younger the user, the more likely they are to show their partner or talk about her.
Thus, 48% of young people between 18 and 29 years old will do so, a percentage that drops to 34% in the 30 to 49 year old age range and falls apart among adults between 50 and 64 years old (14%).
Only 7% of those over 65 will.
"Having a partner and showing it off in society is overvalued and is unconsciously perceived as synonymous with success," reflects Fraile.
This explains the overabundance of sugar on Instagram, a place where, before applying a Valencia filter, the photos go through a social and personal filter that further distorts reality.
"What I publish on the Internet is the image that others will have of my life and that identity is where today many build their self-esteem," says the psychologist.
In this context, the soft introduction of a couple on social networks may seem like a frivolous and absurd trend, something that affects only very young people or very addicted to the mobile.
But how couples show themselves in public, also before the digital public, matters.
The way we have of telling ourselves, of projecting ourselves, matters.
And the way in which business language and techniques are infiltrating them as well.
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