Buying a Christmas tree with the kids?

Let it!

From an innocent trip that turns into hell

Created: 12/23/2022, 9:20 am

By: Barbara Schlotterer-Fuchs

Scene of horror: Christmas tree plantation.

© Petra Nowack/Imago

Crime scene: Christmas tree plantation.

It's a place of dreams, but also a place where - as our columnist recently experienced first-hand - real family dramas can take place.

Peaceful atmosphere on the way to the family event.

Bright eyes.

So many beautiful trees.

The son roams about.

Daughter 1 quickly fell in love with a tree.

He's big, well built.

Only one or the other little branch is missing.

The overall impression is correct.

In fact, it's as good as bought.

But daughter 2 bit into another tree.

It's a bit bushier.

The son fears that he is so bushy that there may not be any space left under the protruding lower branches - and takes the side of the other sister less for aesthetic reasons than for selfishness.

You know the orcs from "Lord of the Rings"?

Something like that

She's already cheering inside, but didn't reckon with daughter 2.

She, in turn, is now raging, running raging, screaming and snorting with a bright red face across the rows of trees like a mini berserker.

You know the orcs from "Lord of the Rings"?

something like that.

By the way, dad has long been sitting in the car with the engine running.

Guess what smokes more: the exhaust or the red head?

Christmas: Dead for her unless her tree comes home

Daughter 1 is unimpressed by all of this.

After all, she would have had to do without her personally chosen dream trees in the past two years, she cries across the plantation, crying.

And anyway: She does not decorate any tree other than the one she has chosen.

Christmas: Dead for her unless her tree comes home.

Welcome to the Christmas Flodders

She cannot be moved away from her dream tree.

An eight-year-old's tree activism works without tape.

Meanwhile, the tree seller has hidden behind a tree far away with an expression that will never be forgotten.

Strange.

Welcome to the Christmas Flodders.

Chris Rea sings his "Driving home for Christmas" on the radio - but we're going to hell

"Look children, it's beautiful too." "No!" it roars from one corner, "No!" it howls from the other.

At the end I trudge to the car furiously.

Instead of a tree, I drag the foaming mob behind me.

Chris Rea sings his “Driving home for Christmas” on the radio.

Strictly speaking, we're not going home, we're going straight to hell.

It bubbles and hisses, the mood is at least as low down as the point where the gorge of hell has to open up.

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At home the howling continues.

The atmosphere is so frigid that it is surprising that the torrents of tears do not rise to the ground like frozen waterfalls.

The fronts are hardened.

The pain about the missing Christmas tree at Christmas is immeasurable - especially for those who caused the dilemma.

I go to the Christmas tree sale alone the next day, look for a tree that everyone should like, and apologize to the saleswoman from the day before for the behavior of my embarrassing family.

She waves it off.

"What!

We often have crying children with us.” Apparently, when we buy a Christmas tree, there are battle scenes like those from the Battle of Middle-earth not only in our family.

Marriage dramas should also not be uncommon when buying a Christmas tree, reveals the saleswoman.

For example, a woman once left her husband on the plantation and drove away alone in her car because her husband wanted a different tree than she did.

Even if you as a family – armed to the teeth and hopefully well-versed in hand-to-hand combat – should set out to buy a Christmas tree and come home with/without a tree and in a bad/great mood: by Christmas Eve at the latest, we’ll all be blissfully under the Christmas tree again and we’ll all be together again dear.

By the way: everything from the region is also available in our regular Schongau newsletter.

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