After every up comes a down, they say, and it turns out there is something scientific about it.
Psychologists report an increase in the number of people experiencing feelings of extreme anxiety and sadness after having sex, and it even has a name - postcoital dysphoria - commonly known as the "post-sex blues".
Although this is a phenomenon that occurs after consensual sex, many psychologists point out that it is common among victims of sexual assault.
Dr. Lori Beth Bisby has also seen a number of PCD patients who are confused as to why they are overwhelmed with negative emotions, since they have not had traumatic sexual experiences in the past.
"I suspect it has to do with the fact that people always expect more than they get from their sexual experiences." , the sexual therapist told The Post. "Many people expect a higher level of satisfaction and intimacy to relieve stress in other areas of their lives, but in practice it doesn't happen much."
People always expect more than they get from their sexual experiences (Photo: ShutterStock)
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Dr. Bisby emphasizes that there is a difference between PCD and a general wave of emotions that can occur at the end of a powerful sex session -
"People can cry or laugh after intense pleasurable experiences because the crying or laughing both function like releasing air from a pressure valve," she explained. "This happens especially if the experience was very physically intense like a strong orgasm or multiple orgasms, in which case it's not exactly the blues."
However, true PCD that becomes chronic can lead to serious problems, including complete avoidance of intimacy.
If you often suffer from anxiety and depression following sex, there are several ways relieve the problematic feelings.
"Before having sex, be clear with yourself about the reason - know why you are having sex with this particular person, at this moment, and don't do anything until the answer is clear to you," she stated.
"If you feel guilty or ashamed, stop everything and check yourself before having sex - talk about it - either with your partner, a friend or a professional."
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"Don't expect physical intimacy to solve emotional problems" (Photo: ShutterStock)
According to the doctor, many couples use sex willingly and with the intention of distracting or trying to solve other problems - which alone can also cause PCD:
"Don't expect physical intimacy to solve emotional problems," she warned. "Physical intimacy increases the relationship, Helps to connect, but many problems also need discussion, processing, and negotiation to be resolved."
In addition, the therapist says that there is always a possibility, especially for women, but also for men - that hormonal problems contribute to the melancholic feeling of the PCD. "I had a 52-year-old client who came to me because she cried every time she had sex with her husband," Bisbee recalled. "It got so bad that she avoided sex as a result.
Her symptoms started around [age] 50, coinciding with menopause symptoms.
"The menopausal symptoms also had a negative impact on her sex life. It took several months of work to untangle the physical symptoms from the emotional ones and deal with the emotional issues so that she was able to want to have sex again," Bisby said.
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