The Limited Times

Now you can see non-English news...

"It is possible to live with a man, according to the Halacha": the religious-LGBT conflict is coming out of the closet - voila! News

2023-02-17T10:42:14.183Z


The coming out of the closet of a News 12 journalist flooded the LGBT question in the religious society. While the conservatives define it as a "problem to deal with", the liberal segment also finds it difficult to contain it. Gay-religious young people told how Sharkey's exciting post is expected to affect the community, and shared the complex process they went through by themselves


The coming out of the closet of Yair Sharki, a religious affairs reporter for News 12, in an emotional post, flooded the LGBT question in the religious society. While the most conservative define it as a "problem" and claim that it can be "handled", even the more liberal and more inclusive segment of religious Zionism, find it difficult to fully accept this, especially when it comes to religious gays. Many tend to think that the Halacha forbids this, but others manage to find a balance within it, they keep the Halacha to their perception as well as their sexual orientation. The 27-year-old Ohad lives with his husband Yair in Zichron Ya'akov. He



shared In the process of coming out of the closet, he told how his religious parents accepted the step and detailed his first sexual encounters with men. "I was born in Kochav Yair, which is a place that is considered liberal, but my family is more religious and conservative.

In high school I attended a religious school, I was an instructor in Bnei Akiva and in the Hesder yeshiva I studied at Mount Etzion



He described it as a difficult process, and about the contradictions with the religious way of life.

"I wasn't in a hurry to come out because ten years ago it was still taboo, when I was younger it even crossed my mind that it was disgusting. In addition, I was the 'dus' brother at home, so it was even more difficult. Coming out in front of my brothers was polarizing because we have a generational gap of nearly 15 years between the brothers, when I told my older brother he accepted it in the market, on the other hand my younger brother accepted it with love and even as a matter of course."

More in Walla!

  • https://news.walla.co.il/item/3558812

  • Hanan Ben Ari to Yair Sharki: "Thank you for the courage to be yourself and to give courage to others"

  • 10 weeks and you will know how to swim long distances!

    At TI we commit to success!

twitter

His parents, on the other hand, were able to contain the news, but suggested that he go to conversion therapy, a scarring experience for a fan in itself.

"At the age of 18, my parents took me to a restaurant and asked me on their own initiative about my sexual orientation, so that it was easier for me to come out in front of them," Ohad shared.

"On the other hand, they asked me to go to conversion therapy. People think it's just to go to a psychologist, but that's not the point. Precisely because the treatments are done with methods of emotional manipulation, they cause scars in the soul. You hate yourself and the place you came from and cause your parents to peck. It hurts and causes terrible pain."



"Even after I came out of the closet, my sexual encounters were in the closet. Once I met with someone who turned out to be much older. He pressured me to come to bed and when I refused, he still tried with force. In the end I pushed him away and ran away. I was very distressed after that because I blamed I met him myself. I didn't know it wasn't supposed to look like this and I had no one to talk to," Ohad said.



"Today there are many more options and it is important that other men know about them. The closet causes many risky situations. If the rabbi tells someone to marry a woman and be with men on the side, then we know what things look like from the side and in secret. It is important for me to tell parents - when a child comes out of the closet it is not a disaster , and this is a blessing."



He described life as a religious homosexual as someone who "every day comes out of the closet anew, because I wear a kippah and it's complicated."

According to him, "The Halacha does not prohibit homosexuality or living in a relationship with men, it prohibits anal relations. Everyone can choose what to do and what is right and wrong not in sexual relations. There is a lot to offer. It works out wonderfully Halachically. Once we understand ourselves and What we like everything works out. The question is what do I like sexually, there is not one thing on the menu but a variety."

Yair Sharkey (Photo: Nir Pekin)

Jonathan (photo: courtesy of those photographed)

Yonatan, 32 years old, a humanities and photography teacher, lives in Alon Shabot - a religious settlement in Gush Etzion.

He told about his experiences within the religious environment in which he grew up and lives to this day: "I was born and raised in Jerusalem, today I work and live in a religious environment and feel surrounded and loved. At the age of 14 I realized that I was gay, and already at the age of 16 I told the psychologist that I was gay and I needed her help to keep mitzvot Along with my sexual orientation. After high school I studied for ten years at a yeshiva in Gush Etzion."



He shared the difficult feelings brought up by his coming out of the closet in front of his immediate family, but also about the relief he experienced when they agreed to accept him as he is as a religious family.

"Although it was clear to me who I was from a young age, I only told my family at the age of 25. To a certain extent, I did them an injustice by not telling them sooner because I thought they would scold me and stress me, but they were a role model when I came out because it was quite simple and they accepted me as That I am, it should go without saying, but it probably isn't," Jonathan described.



Yonatan works as a guide for instructors in the group of "Huvrata" (the religious LGBT organization) operating in Gush Etzion, which has included dozens of men over the years, and he also claims that he does not think there is a conflict between his halachic and religious lifestyle and his sexual preference: "It can To create a way to have conjugal relations between men that does not go against the halacha.

I believe with all my heart that it is possible to have a full married life without breaking the Halacha, I know gay couples who live this way.

I hope to find the right man with whom I can start a family."

"I am gay, but connected to the religious way of life. The Mount Etzion Yeshiva where Ohad studied (Photo: Flash 90, Gershon Allinson)

Yonatan believes that coming out of the closet of a well-known person, like Sharkey, can be an inspiration for other religious gays who have not yet come out of the closet, but he emphasized that every coming out of the closet is complex and done with sensitivity to the specific case.

"I appreciate Sharkey for coming out publicly, and it certainly gives a lot of legitimacy to other men to be able to come out and find a better listening ear among their families," he said.



"We know that there are many exits after a well-known person leaves the closet, but we have to remember that the process of exiting is difficult, especially in a religious society, and we need to examine whether it is done in a measured and considered manner as long as it doesn't actually become more traumatic," Jonathan continued.



Nathaniel Schler, CEO of Hevrata, also congratulated Yair Sharkey for his exciting coming out of the closet and for what he wrote, which he says "accurates so accurately the complex experiences that we as religious LGBT people face. We are happy that today it is much more convenient to come out of the closet,



Schler also said that "the two identities, the LGBT and the religious, do not contradict each other, but integrate and strengthen each other.

LGBT is neither a passion nor an agenda, it is an identity. Just like Judaism. Our huge community in the fellowship proves this. And by the way, all religious LGBT people, in and out of the closet, are welcome to join us."

  • news

  • News in Israel

  • Events in Israel

Tags

  • LGBT

  • Yair Sharky

  • Religious Zionism

Source: walla

All news articles on 2023-02-17

You may like

Trends 24h

News/Politics 2024-03-28T06:04:53.137Z

Latest

© Communities 2019 - Privacy

The information on this site is from external sources that are not under our control.
The inclusion of any links does not necessarily imply a recommendation or endorse the views expressed within them.