How is it possible that people who have grown up with a sense of right and wrong end up involved in
terrible acts of violence against others
?
That is the human mystery at the heart of some 2,000 intercepted phone calls from Russian soldiers in Ukraine.
The wiretaps, obtained by
The Associated Press
, reveal
a harrowing new perspective on
Russian President Vladimir Putin's year-long war, seen through the eyes of Russian soldiers themselves.
The AP verified the calls, made in March 2022 by soldiers from a military division that Ukrainian prosecutors say committed war crimes in Bucha, a town outside Kiev that became an early symbol of Russian atrocities.
Russian soldiers arrived at the front lines with little preparation.
Source: AP, illustration by Peter Hamlin.
They show
how unprepared the young
soldiers—and their country—were for the coming war.
Many joined the army because they needed money and were told of their deployment at the last minute.
They were told that they would be welcomed as heroes for liberating Ukraine from its Nazi oppressors and Western patrons, and that kyiv would fall without bloodshed within a week.
The wiretaps show that as the soldiers realized how much they had been deceived,
their fear increased
.
Violence, previously unthinkable, became normal.
Looting and drinking offered moments of rare respite.
Some say they were carrying out orders to kill civilians or prisoners of war.
They tell their mothers what this war is really like: about
the Ukrainian teenager who had his ears cut off
.
How the scariest noise isn't the whistle of a rocket flying past, but the silence that means it's coming straight at you.
How modern weapons can so destroy a human body that there is nothing left to return home.
We listen as their mothers struggle to reconcile their pride and horror, and as their wives and fathers beg them not to drink too much and to please call home.
These are the stories of one of those men
: Leonid.
The AP is not using their full names to protect their families in Russia.
The AP confirmed that he was in the areas where the atrocities took place, but
has no proof of his individual actions
beyond what he admits.
Russian atrocities are piling up in Ukraine.
Source: AP, illustration by Peter Hamlin.
The AP spoke with Leonid's mother, and verified the calls with the help of the Dossier Center, a London-based research group funded by Russian dissident Mikhail Khodorkovsky.
The conversation has been edited for length and clarity.
leonid
Leonid
became a soldier because he needed money
.
He was in debt and did not want to depend on his parents.
"I just
wasn't emotionally ready
for my son to go to war at the age of 19," his mother told the AP in January.
"None of us had experienced something like this, that his son would live at a time when he has to go fight."
Leonid's mother argues that Russia needs to protect itself from its enemies, but, like many other Russians, she expected her country to quickly seize areas in eastern Ukraine.
Instead, Leonid's unit was stuck in Bucha.
“
No one thought this would be so terrible
,” her mother said.
“My son only said one thing: 'My conscience is clear.
They opened fire first.'
That's all".
In the calls, there is an obvious moral dissonance between the way Leonid's mother raised him and what he is seeing and doing in Ukraine.
Still, she defended her son, insisting that he was never in contact with civilians in Ukraine.
He assured that everything was calm and civilized, that there were no problems at the checkpoints and that nothing bad had happened.
He maintains that the war did not change his son.
Russian soldiers offer testimonials to the horror of the war in Ukraine.
Source: AP, illustration by Peter Hamlin.
She refused to listen to any of the recordings: This is absurd, she alleged.
Just don't try to make it look like my son killed innocent people.
Kill if you don't want to be killed
Leonid's introduction to the war came on February 24, when his unit crossed into Ukraine from Belarus and decimated a detachment of Ukrainians in the border area.
After his first fight, Leonid
seems to have compassion for the young
Ukrainian soldiers they had just killed.
Mother: When did you get scared?
Leonid: When our commander warned us that we would be shot at, 100%.
He warned us that even if we were shelled and shot at, our goal was to get through.
Mother: Did they shoot you?
Leonid: Of course, but we defeated them.
Mother: Hmm.
Did you shoot from your tanks?
Leonid: Yes, we did.
We fired from the tanks, with machine guns and rifles
.
We had no losses.
We destroyed his four tanks.
There were corpses thrown and burning.
So, we win.
Mother: Oh, what a nightmare!
Lyonka, you wanted to live in that moment, right, honey?
The images of the conflict are repeated in different parts throughout Ukraine.
Photo: AFP
Leonid: More than ever!
Mother: More than ever, right honey?
Leonid: Of course.
Mother: It's totally horrible.
Leonid:
They were lying there, they were only 18 or 19 years old
.
Am I different from them?
No, I'm not.
The rules of normal life no longer apply
Leonid tells his mother that the plan was for them to take over kyiv in a week, without firing a single bullet.
Instead, his unit began taking fire near Chernobyl.
They had no maps and the Ukrainians had removed all road signs.
It was so confusing, he says.
They were well prepared.
Not having expected a prolonged attack,
the Russian soldiers ran out of basic supplies
.
One way to get what they needed—or wanted—was to steal.
Many soldiers, Leonid among them, talk about money with the guarded precision that comes from not having enough.
Some receive requests from friends and family for shoes in certain sizes and parts for specific cars, proud to come home with something to give.
A Russian soldier and a witness to the horror of the war in Ukraine.
Photo: AFP
When Leonid casually tells his mother about the looting,
at first he can't believe that he is stealing
, but it has become normal for him.
As he speaks, he sees a city burning on the horizon.
What a beauty, express.
Leonid: Look, Mom, I'm looking at tons of houses—I don't know, tens, hundreds—and they're all empty.
They all fled.
Mother: So all the people left, right?
You are not looting them, are you?
Aren't you going into other people's houses?
Leonid: Of course we are going to do it, mom.
You are crazy?
Mother: Oh yes you do.
And what do you take from there?
Leonid:
We take food
, bedding, pillows, blankets, forks, spoons, pans.
Mother: (laughing) You have to be kidding.
Leonid: Whoever doesn't have them, takes socks, clean underwear, t-shirts and sweaters.
The enemy is everyone
Leonid tells his mother about the terror of going out on patrol and not knowing what or who they are going to meet.
He describes how he uses deadly force at the slightest provocation against almost anyone.
At first, she doesn't seem to believe that Russian soldiers could be killing civilians.
Advance scenes of a Ukrainian tank in the Donbas region.
Photo: AFP
Leonid tells him that
the civilians were ordered to flee
or take shelter in cellars, so anyone outside must not be a true civilian.
Putin and others had told Russian soldiers that they would be greeted as liberators and that anyone who resisted was a fascist or insurgent, not a true civilian.
It was a war of the whole society.
Mercy was for fools.
Mother: Oh, Lyonka, you have seen so many things there!
Leonid: Well... there are civilians lying there, in the street, with their brains out.
Mother: Oh god, do you mean the residents?
Leonid: Yeah, well, sure, yeah.
Mother: Are they the ones who got shot or the ones who…?
Leonid: The ones our army killed.
Mother: Lyonya, they may be peaceful people.
Leonid: Mom, there was a battle and then some guy would just show up, you know?
Maybe he would take out a grenade launcher
... Or there was a case, a young man was arrested and his cell phone was taken away.
He had all the information about us in his Telegram messages: where to attack, how many we were, how many tanks we have.
And that is.
Mother: So they knew everything?
Leonid: He was shot right there, on the spot.
Mother: Mm.
Leonid: I was 17 years old.
And that's it, right there.
Mother: Mm.
Leonid: There was a prisoner.
He was an 18 year old boy.
First, they shot him in the leg.
Then they cut off his ears
.
After that, he admitted everything and they killed him.
Mother: He admitted it?.
Leonid: We don't imprison them.
I mean, we kill them all.
Mother: Mm.
What it takes to get home alive
Leonid tells his mother that
he was nearly killed five times
.
Everything is so disorganized, he says, that it's not uncommon for the Russians to shoot their own soldiers, something that even happened to him.
Some soldiers shoot themselves just to get a medical license, he assures himself.
On another call, he tells his girlfriend that he envy his friends who got shot in the feet and got to go home.
“
A bullet in the foot is like four months at home on crutches
”, he says.
"It would be great".
He then hangs up due to gunshots coming his way.
Mother: Hello, Lyonechka.
Leonid: I just wanted to call you again.
I can speak now.
Mother: Oh, that's good.
Leonid: There are people here who shoot themselves.
Mother: Mm.
Leonid:
They do it for the insurance money
.
Do you know where they shoot themselves?
Mother: That's nonsense, Lyonya.
Leonid: On the lower part of the left thigh.
Mother: It's nonsense, Lyonya.
They're crazy, you know that, right?
Leonid: Some people are so scared that
they are ready to hurt themselves
, just to leave.
Mother: Yes, it's fear, what can you do here, it's human fear.
Everybody wants to live
.
I don't argue with that, but please don't.
We all pray for you.
You should cross yourself any chance you get, just walk away from everyone and do it.
We all pray for you.
We are all worried.
Leonid: I'm standing here, and you know what the situation is?
Now I am 30 meters (100 feet) from a huge graveyard (laughs).
Mother: Oh, that's horrible…it's over soon.
Leonid tells his girlfriend that he had to learn a way to clear his mind.
“Imagine, it's night.
You are sitting in the dark and all is quiet.
Alone with your thoughts.
And day after day, you sit alone, with those thoughts, ”he tells his girlfriend.
“I already learned not to think about anything while sitting outside.
Leonid promises to bring home a collection of bullets for the children.
“
Ukrainian trophies
”, he calls them himself.
His mother says that she will be waiting for him.
Of course I'll be back, why not?, replies Leonid.
“Of course you will come,” says her mother.
"No doubts.
I love you.
Of course you will return.
You are my happiness
”.
Leonid returned to Russia in May, badly wounded, but alive.
He told his mother that Russia will win this war.
Source: AP
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