Question: Several years ago my boyfriend left me and it's something I can't get over. He got married and started a family. But I could never fall in love again, I live alone and I work giving private classes.
RMV, Saladillo
Human life passes with a perception of temporal sequences in which
chronological time coexists with psychological time.
Frequently both do not coincide
and that is why sometimes a few minutes seem endless when faced with boring or uncomfortable events or several hours go by very quickly when faced with something that is happy or gratifying.
Therefore, the experience of the passage of time
is lengthened or shortened according to the emotional state of a person.
It is something very subjective and that is not related to the time that the clock shows.
The human mind handles concepts such as time that
permanently influence our lives
, although they are hardly ever registered or consciously paid attention to.
While living in the present, the past or the future coexist in the mind.
/ SEE
Thus, the Polish religious and poet Angelus Silesius stated:
“You yourself make time.
Your watch is your senses”.
Past, present and future
While living in the present, day by day,
the past or the future coexist subtly in the mind.
Even for many people, their current life is what happens to them while they are absorbed in their past or afflicted by the future.
The past, which is always present through memories or experiences,
gives meaning to existence, marks the personality by knowing who one is
through identity, and conditions the future.
Who is emotionally ill lives the past as if it were present.
/ Photo: Andres D'Elia
Although it is impossible to give up or ignore it, it
is essential to prevent it from becoming a tether that paralyzes
and hinders living in the present.
This is what happens to many depressed or nostalgic people in whom the presence of memories and situations experienced –whether they have been good or bad– are more intense than the current events, which prevents them from fully connecting with their present and with the
circumstances
. concrete of everyday life.
Those who are emotionally ill live the past as if it were present, yearn for it and think more about what they should have done and did not do than what should be done.
She is scared, isolates or resigns to what may come
and does not feel prepared to face the tomorrow that he imagines as a certain failure.
Whoever lives their present, rescues and appreciates the good of their past, and trusts in themselves and their ability to design their future will feel good.
Norberto Abdala, psychiatrist
They are people who suffer a lot because they believe they are insecure, indecisive, with doubts, fears and who give up living or
seek the protection of who they consider stronger as support
for their life.
At the opposite pole are those who cannot live their present well by investing time and grief in a future that they imagine is dangerous, and they
prepare more for what may happen than for what is actually happening.
This usually generates worries, anxiety or fears that affect the present well-being.
Anticipating eventual future risks and dangers protects and
enables preparation to face them in good shape
and activates the body and mind to respond to anything that may compromise our safety.
But if the mind anticipates misfortunes or negative things that are not confirmed in reality, are unfounded, exaggerated or illogical, it
paralyzes, sickens and limits the ability to enjoy life.
Whoever lives their present, rescues and appreciates the good of their past, and
trusts in themselves and their ability
to design their future will feel good.
MS
look also
Mood swings: why should you pay attention to them?
How psychological factors play in sexual relations
Why do we have self-destructive behaviors?
