As of: January 29, 2024, 5:20 p.m
By: Gerda Gebel
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Anke Finauer-Heublein is the new manager.� Frustration, anger and powerlessness Two to four months waiting time © Gerda Gebel
Erding- Anke Finauer-Heublein is the new head of marriage, family and life counseling in Erding and has been working as such for six months.
She talks about her everyday life.
The Erdinger marriage, family and life counseling center of the Archdiocese of Munich and Freising has been under new management for six months.
The qualified psychologist Anke Finauer-Heublein took over the management from her predecessor Melanie Dietzsch.
For the 50-year-old therapist, getting started was completely smooth, as she reports.
Finauer-Heublein has been working as a consultant in Erding since 2019 and is therefore very familiar with her colleagues and the processes. “I just changed the room,” she explains with a laugh.
Born in Thuringia, she is the mother of three children and lives near Erding.
She completed her psychology studies in Bamberg.
In addition to her management work, she also runs a private psychotherapeutic practice in Anzing.
After further training in systemic therapy and clinical hypnosis therapy, she can draw on over ten years of experience in counseling, psychotherapy and couples therapy.
The focus of the counseling topics in Erding has remained stable, with 40 percent being in the areas of relationships and sexuality.
23 percent of clients seek advice on separation and divorce; according to annual statistics in Erding, this area is slightly above the average for the overall facility.
Topics relating to family coexistence make up 18 percent of the conversations, social matters account for eleven percent, and the remaining eight percent fall under life advice.
The current political situation in Germany and the world is having a clear impact on those seeking advice.
“People are very unsettled by the corona crisis they have just overcome, then the wars in Ukraine and the Middle East, the heating crisis and much more,” states the psychologist.
Increased fears for the future as well as feelings of frustration, anger and powerlessness are currently a topic for many people in consultations.
Here the therapist advises a certain amount of reflection on yourself in order to be able to think more positively again.
“Going out into nature and the mountains, doing sports like swimming, cycling and running, but also spending time with family and friends, exchanging ideas with people, and ultimately reflecting on the areas that you can influence yourself, that gives us more positive things Feelings and thoughts.”
In order to be able to help effectively, it would be advisable for clients to come to counseling early and not only when the relationship has already largely come to an end and is characterized by frustration, negative thoughts about the other person, resignation and hopelessness, emphasizes Finauer-Heublein.
If there are problems in the relationship, it is helpful to accept and value your partner, even in the event of conflicts, because it should not be “about being right,” she says.
“Listening and wanting to really understand the other person, so to speak, looking at the world from the other person’s eyes for the moment, doesn’t mean having to give up your own opinion at the same time.
“Arguments divide us,” says the experienced consultant.
“Wanting to understand, on the other hand, means being interested in the other person, in their perspective and their feelings, and thereby creates great closeness.
Of course, this requires the willingness and ability to critically question oneself.”
There are currently three consultants working at the Erdinger advice center on Landgestütstrasse; the waiting time for new clients is two to four months.
According to Finauer-Heublein, the waiting lists are significantly shorter in Freising and Ebersberg.
The consultations take place mainly in person, but are also possible via telephone or video chat if clients wish this for certain reasons.
“The therapist's task is, among other things, to support the clients in taking good and helpful growth steps for themselves and together - whether as individuals or as a couple - to recognize and leverage the possible solutions that have often unconsciously existed for a long time.
This is always a very nice and satisfying task.”
A dose of humor doesn't hurt, “because with a little humor it's much easier.
The clients also notice this, because humor distances and puts things into perspective,” says Finauer-Heublein.
The archdiocese's free, non-denominational, donation-based service is open to all citizens; the advisors are subject to confidentiality.
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Marriage, family and life counseling from the Archdiocese of Munich and Freising, Landgestütstraße 10, Erding, Tel. (0 81 22) 9 37 64. www.erzbistum-muenchen.de/eheberatung-oberbayern
Frustration, anger and powerlessness
Two to four months waiting time