As of: January 29, 2024, 8:48 a.m
By: Nadja Rödig
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Haha, none of this upsets me at all.
HAHA.
✨ Start every day as if it could be the best of your life.
✨ You've probably received this or something similar from an old person as life-changing advice.
This works really well until you get up and ram your knee into the edge of the bed, smear toothpaste on your last clean shirt and are almost knocked out of existence by an e-scooter while your bus drives away from you... while still hitting you delighted with a load of splashing water.
And you, the unlucky one, are happy when your damn week is finally over.
If these “little annoyances” quickly develop into a full-blown “he’s grown up now and can go out into the world” tantrum, here’s your biggest nightmare:
1. If your morning isn't going well, maybe a cube is clogged.
2. There's nothing in the script for the best day of your life about a fingernail being destroyed by Lego.
3. Some Care Bears get two drinks straight from the vending machine. Others do the same, but their door can't be opened anymore!!!!!
My news
Plane crash in Belgium: two Germans die
Snowstorm surprises holiday destination: Tourists are stuck in a kilometer-long traffic jam - the army intervenes
Record temperatures in the middle of winter: Spain is overwhelmed by a heat wave
Speed camera Robin Hood?
“Fleximan” leaves Italy’s authorities perplexed
“Made me cry” – influencer despairs over French reading behavior while on vacation
Manager beats up flight attendants - Lufthansa plane turns on route from Munich to New York reread
4. It takes superhuman patience and a great personality not to give these colleagues a roundhouse kick.
5. On a plane you might dream of stuffing your smelly socks into someone's face.
6. You would distract yourself, but AHHHHHHHHHHHH, it's okay.
7. The devil's greatest trick was...inventing puzzles.
8. Of course it could be that you're just hungry. Make yourself a frozen vegetable pan with lots of broccoli.
9. Or grab a banana.
10. Well then, just ice cream!
11. Meditate for a while before pushing the shopping cart up someone's butt.
12. It would be less annoying if you had kicked the thing down out of anger. But hey, gravity.
13. Prize question: What is more annoying than a rail strike?
That's right, nothing is more annoying than a rail strike.
But at least you can distract yourself from the train chaos and canceled trains with funny pictures.
14. Luckily you can easily order things, 120 resting heart rate included!
15. Feeling bad for the environment and a bit of self-hatred are also included.
16. At least online shopping doesn't have any more surprises in store.
17. It's good that you can distract yourself with your cat. Oh... No, she peed on your laptop.
18. Better not look at your dog now...
19. ... or your laundry.
20. Luckily, the ✨ best ✨ day of your life is finally over. When the house keys that were lost in the snow turn up again. Good luck.
No luck, these poor bastards have it too:
22 unlucky people who simply have bad cards in the game of life
19 poor souls in need who are having a much, much, much worse week than you
14 job failures that will make you want to turn right back and go to bed
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