When we talked about the breakup between Rosalía Rauw Alejandro, the one that so many people felt as their own, we already put on the table a term coined by Donald Horton and R. Richard Wohl in 1956: parasocial relationships.
These are the fanciful relationships that social networks reinforce today and that make Internet users feel that celebrities are part of their inner circle.
This bond, of a unilateral nature (since it is very likely that the celebrity in question does not even know of the existence of someone who believes to be someone close to him), is responsible for the fact that when a well-known person is betrayed, it generates among so many people a sadness comparable to what they would feel if their best friend had been cheated on.
Immersed in a society that turns social networks into a center for the exhibition of personal relationships, many believe they know perfectly the dynamics of couples and their secrets, so when the love story - which has been narrated by its protagonists , who, being owners of their narrative, move the threads of storytelling as they please - explode into the air, they become sad, and the moment the character in question has a new romantic interest, they become extremely happy.
The Trivago Syndrome
But not only is the arrival of this new figure celebrated, but immediately - especially when the new partner is strikingly charming or attractive - the newcomer is usually compared to his predecessor.
María Gómez, author of 'The Good Company', points out that this behavior is completely normal.
“In reality, our entire life is based on social comparison.
We get an idea of who we are and how we are once we see others.
We compare ourselves to our friends, our neighbors and celebrities, even if it is unconsciously.
For this reason, we also compare celebrity couples and get an idea of whether they are better or worse,” she says.
At the moment in which Rosalía has been immortalized in a loving attitude with Jeremy Allen White, the undoubted
internet boyfriend
(the man who, as a result of digital hysteria, becomes the most desired by the networks) of the moment, the online universe has not hesitant to compare the Puerto Rican with the protagonist of 'The Bear'... And feeling very sorry for the author of 'All About You', the torrid and viral images of the actor in his underwear have not worked in his favor.
This comparison also included the fact that Allen White, at the 'Critics Choice Awards', wore the same brooch with a poppy silhouette signed by Elsa Peretti for Tiffany & Co, a model that Rauw Alejandro wore at the 2022 Latin Grammys. where he posed with Rosalía.
Coincidence or provocation?
We will never know, but the Catalan's fans were quick to applaud the interpreter's supposed wink of complicity while comparing the clumsiness with which the Puerto Rican has behaved after the breakup, with moments that have made headlines, such as the fact that Bad Gyal will refuse to twerk with Rauw Alejandro at a performance in Puerto Rico.
His relationship with an 18-year-old TikToker has not added points in his favor either.
As if that were not enough, we even like to think that whoever betrayed the celebrity we follow will be sad to know that their ex-partner has found someone new, at least under the attentive - and at the same time subjective - gaze of their fans. , it's much better.
As Alba Duran, Marketing Director at Bumble Spain, says, we find ourselves in a society influenced by the type of relationships shown on social networks and by the romanticism of Hollywood movies.
“People in Spain like romance, as indicated by a Bumble study that reveals that three out of four people think it is a crucial part of the relationship.
We empathize with what we see on the screens and create a connection with the people who appear on them,” she clarifies.
For this reason, we not only compare celebrity couples, but we create fantasies about their lives in which in the new chapter in which the newcomer intervenes, everything is perfect.
Gómez wants to clarify that apart from the parasocial relationships that come into play when we talk about
celebs
, we cannot leave aside a positive aspect that surrounds the fan phenomenon.
“Giving the example of Rosalía, who has millions of fans, we have to remember that they have real and true affection for her.
When you're a fan of someone, you're genuinely happy for their success, but we can't forget that we don't really know them.
Nor can you analyze the lives of famous people in the name of psychology, because psychology is not advice or opinions,” he clarifies.
Rosalía's fans do not hesitate to praise the chiseled silhouette of Jeremy Allen White, who after having posed for Calvin Klein, has practically become a state affair, and at this point we wonder if when comparing couples with physical aspects in mind - whether from celebrities or others, and even our own - we are not somehow resorting to objectification by staying on the surface and considering it an advancement that someone more beautiful takes the former partner's place.
At this point the halo effect intervenes, an unconscious emotional judgment according to which we attribute positive attributes to the most attractive people.
“Unfortunately, in the world we live in, which is increasingly superficial, beauty is one of the most valued things.
It is something that has been put into our heads, especially women, and it is a difficult idea to change.
The halo effect is a bias that limits us and makes us reach erroneous conclusions.
We make many prejudices when we interact and of course, we have to understand that no one is a trophy just because of their physique,” warns María Gómez.
The important thing to keep in mind is that although there may be a positive side to comparing and analyzing the things we value or don't value in a relationship, in the case of celebrity relationships, we have to keep in mind that when starting this comparison, taking into account With a starting point of what we see on social networks, such a process is not at all productive, since we do not compare ourselves with reality, but with what we imagine or with what couples project.
“We always tend to think that everyone is better off than us and that couples are perfect.
However, we are proving that we should not believe everything we see on the networks.
We see celebrities posting the happiest photo in the world on a dream vacation, a photo that is impossible not to generate envy, and suddenly, a few weeks later, we find out that they are going to get divorced.
The digital world is one and the real world is another.
You don't have to merge these two realities so much,” recalls Gómez.
Rosalía well knows that love can be broken by using it so much (yes: we say it because of the version of Rocío Jurado's song that she sang at the 2023 Latin Grammys before the desolate gaze of Rauw Alejandro), but now we know that also, from so much compare it.