As of: February 7, 2024, 9:00 a.m
By: Alfred Mittermeier
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Alfred Mittermeier © private
Every month, the Dorfen cabaret artist Alfred Mittermeier takes a satirical look back at city life.
The many unclaimed yellow bags stink to him.
Dorfen
- It is often reported that Dorfen has a “southern Italian flair” on hot days.
The company Knettenbrech + Gurdulic ensures that this flair is also present in winter by simply not coming, as they are responsible for collecting the yellow bags.
The result is that the garbage piles up on the roadsides like in Italian places of desire and flies through the air when the wind blows like bedsprings on Nonsense Thursday.
The supposed pick-up experts have turned our beloved nest into a dead-end city.
Zefix Sackrament!
Now, to be fair, one has to take into account that the company with the difficult double name has only been responsible for this task since the beginning of the year.
The local knowledge is not that advanced yet.
This means that neither Burdock Bed nor Gurgelkitsch know when and where yellow sacks are lying.
It is written in the Bible: “He who seeks will find!” But it doesn’t say how long you have to search until you finally find.
There are time limits.
If you don't find your Easter basket until Pentecost, you should keep your hands off the eggs.
Unless you have an acquaintance who you would like company with.
At 100 square kilometers, Dorfen is one of the largest municipalities in Bavaria.
Even a carefully planned bag search can come to nothing.
If Klinkenpech is looking in Schwindkirchen and Gustolicht is in Hausmehring, then the two of them won't find anything if the yellow bags are in Watzling.
However, you can narrow down your search somewhat by only searching into the wind.
With a bit of luck, the bags will be blown into the garbage truck.
And if not?
Then we need a second company that would take both Kettenbrunst and Gurubitsch by the hand and lead them through the winding paths and alleys of the Isental capital along the Yellow Sack routes.
Before this supporting “waste management” is advertised nationally, a little tip: Give these two luminaries the telephone number for the Wilm company.
They have known for decades when and where Bartl has to get the must.
Of course for a generous finder's fee!
One more thing that is no longer as highly valued as Klitschenblech + Gulaschic: Please don't look for it tomorrow!
Tomorrow is unfavorable.
Tomorrow you would bother us even more than the sacks themselves. There would also be a fear that out of pure activism you would load some hemadlenzen resting on the side of the road into your garbage truck and take them with you.
The Hemadlez does not fit into the dual system.
Because the Hemadlez is not recycled, but burned.