Things you didn't know were fears of a serious and concentration disorder/@taramaryalice
Today you are already a wife, mother, self-employed, employed or probably just still looking for yourself!
But mostly you feel torn, you are so talented but you can't bring all your talents together for one big success and you don't know what is best.
The strengths and abilities in you are scattered everywhere and along the way you forget, drop, bump into, repeat yourself, get angry, hurt, waste time and then judge yourself, feel bad and guilty, and so many other phenomena that you didn't understand until now.
Luck, luck that you went with your child to the diagnosis and through his diagnosis you realized that you have exactly what he is diagnosed with but a little different.
The difference is that you were missed in a big way, and it continues to accompany you because what will you do with all this information?
Suddenly you realize that everything you thought about yourself is not true at all, you are not stupid, obtuse, short of understanding, lazy, dreamy or flighty.
You have always had attention deficit disorder and it has ruled your entire life.
The self-worth, the anxieties, the bad thoughts and opinions you had about yourself.
Did you just meet and the sex is excessively good?
Maybe he has this problem,
it only looks romantic - it's dangerous: this is how you distinguish between love and disorder
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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder GIF/Giphy
Unintentional gender discrimination The misdiagnosis
of girls can be seen as another discrimination based on gender, but apparently not intentional.
"When we are born with attention deficit disorder," explains Dr. Shirley Hershko, "we know how to diagnose the boys as early as childhood, because they are loud, brash, run around everywhere and don't listen, while the girls, on the other hand, are quieter, tend to dream and disconnect, sink into thoughts Annoying, but nice, smiling and polite even if their head is not there, because it is distracted most of the time.
They don't absorb the material, but no one notices it because they fell through the cracks a long time ago."
A girl/girl who grows up with the feeling that she doesn't absorb anything in class and especially the information that interests her the least, is unable to learn and concentrate because every noise disturbs and every thought cuts her off In this, the environment tends to think that if they put pressure on her, she will succeed. When precisely this can cause her to achieve lower than her potential. The symptoms of attention deficit disorder in young girls tend to lose and forget things, and frequent changes in mood. These cause a negative attitude from the immediate environment, which which further worsens the cycle of suffering.
It is apparently for life
, this is why boys are diagnosed 4 times more than girls, if the average age for diagnosis for boys is 7, then for girls it is 17, and the years that pass until then have many and varied consequences on matriculation, puberty and their lives Women are streaky. Contrary to popular opinion, that attention disorder is an obstacle only in school, attention disorder is not going anywhere, and it will accompany us at all ages: in high school, in the army, in studies, in marriage, and especially in divorce. At every station in life, the ability to organize is required, whether in motherhood, or In the army, or as a student, at these stages there are no longer the parents who want to organize for those who need it, and the result is more misses, and opportunities that slip through the hands throughout life.
More anxiety and depression:
the consequences of the delay in diagnosis and treatment will not end only in embarrassing grades, it involves a higher risk of low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, feelings of frustration, headaches and stomachaches and eating disorders.
In fact, girls with ADHD are diagnosed with depression three times more often than boys.
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Dr. Shirley Hershko/photo processing, Inga Avshalom Shilian, PR
Daily difficulties in a relationship:
you don't pay attention to important things, there are many changes in mood up to outbursts of anger, aggressive and impulsive, along with the need for excitement.
That's why a relationship that includes attention disorder can cause feelings of frustration, anger, loneliness, fatigue and burnout, and is characterized by conflicts, failure to take responsibility at home, or non-compliance with agreements.
Relationship of Two Attention Deficits
By the way, people with attention disorders are often attracted to each other due to their similar characteristics.
The similarity allows them to better understand the couple, but they will still have difficulty managing the home and family, and maintaining order and organization at home.
When children enter the picture, it is likely that they will also have attention deficit disorder, because it is hereditary and genetic.
The situation will become even more complex from a marital point of view, when the multitude of activities, classes and events that the children bring with them will enter it.
More divorces:
according to studies, the attentive people have a hard time at the beginning of a relationship, and others fail to maintain stable relationships over time.
About 30% of them had more than ten partners in the past, and half of them said that most of their relationships lasted less than a year.
Attention disorder also has an effect on the quality of the relationship: about 55% of people with attention disorder define their relationship as average to bad, and they are at a three times higher risk of divorce, compared to a couple without attention disorder.
Women with attention deficit disorder tend to be much more sensitive, give weight to nuances and linger on issues that women without attention deficit disorder know how to restrain, let go and not make an issue of.
The attentive women can find themselves entangled in impulsive statements in a relationship, without wanting to hurt, hypersensitive to touch and very quickly find themselves on edge.
The divorce rate for couples with attention disorders is also very high, attention disorder is very present in the relationship and can destroy it when there is no awareness of the issue.
More abortions:
if that's not enough, according to research-based data, women with attention disorders have a 6 times risk of unwanted pregnancies and this is due to the tendency to forget to take pills and also to forget that they forgot.
Attention deficit disorder is congenital and characterized by a slightly different brain structure, with less dopamine produced in the brain.
Dopamine is the hormone responsible for attention and many functions including: sleep, nutrition, addictions, allergies, various diseases.
"The importance of the diagnosis is critical" concludes Dr. Shirley Hershko. The accurate diagnosis and the correct treatment are vital. It is important to go to a specialist, undergo a comprehensive diagnosis and receive personalized treatment with close supervision, in order to remove the burden of guilt and self-flagellation, to understand what is at the root of the difficulties and to help The
author
is Dr. Shirley Hershko, she is a senior expert in the field of attention.
Researcher and author, lecturer at the Hebrew University, owner of an institute for diagnosis and treatment, behind her 5 successful books (among them the bestseller, "People of Attention").
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