"Many of us are aware that there is something in our lives that does not work as we would like. It is as if it is not bad, but it
is not quite right
, and I am not just talking about what is related to having," says Mario Alonso Puig in the introduction to his latest book.
Whether it is a higher level of health, prosperity, well-being or happiness, we are aware that for this improvement to occur "something must change and radically"
in
the way of being
of those who are looking for that change, says the Spanish doctor in
The Path of Awakening.
Every transformation begins with oneself
(Editorial Planeta).
However, he admits that it is not an easy task.
"I have spent more than 30 years of my life trying to understand why we complicate things so much for ourselves and, of course, complicate them for others. And I have realized that only a
serious and deep inner search
can provide an answer to our most pressing questions," he emphasizes.
Alonso Puig is a doctor specializing in general and digestive surgery and president of the Center for Health and Wellbeing at IE University (Segovia, Spain).
In addition to his practice as a surgeon, he trained at the Institute of Neurological Sciences of Madrid and the Mind-Body Institute of Harvard University, with the aim of finding tools that allow him to better understand and address the topic that excites him: how deploy human potential, especially in times of
challenge, uncertainty and change
.
In the last 20 years he wrote
more than a dozen books
.
In
The Path of Awakening
, he connects the metaphor of the Hero's Path to discoveries about how the brain works (the way our minds determine what we perceive and how we perceive ourselves).
And he offers tools to
overcome the limitations
that prevent people from achieving what they long for.
Happiness and well-being are not the same
And if we talk about desires, happiness and well-being are high on the wish list.
In a recent interview with
Clarín
, Alonso Puig differentiated them and stated that achieving happiness depends on oneself.
"Subjective well-being is everything that generates enjoyment in the senses, that is, if I eat a good roast, logically I will notice that in my palate, in my eyesight, in my taste. If I travel well, I will to enjoy with my senses traveling well, in a comfortable car, etc.", he exemplified.
"Happiness, on the other hand, is the joy of the heart, and the heart only experiences
joy when it is shared
, that is, when there is another person or other people who are also enjoying what I enjoy. That is, if I "I eat less roast but I invite people dear to me to enjoy that roast, what I experience when I see their enjoyment, even though I eat less in quantity, that is happiness."
Deep self-knowledge is key to increasing happiness, says the Spaniard.
Photo Courtesy.
"Of course happiness depends on oneself, subjective well-being does not: if I am starving, then logically it will be very difficult for me to have those senses fulfilled. But
happiness is something that I can choose
, regardless of the environment," the doctor stressed.
In his latest book he takes up this idea and offers a series of simple practices to increase happiness and that help advance on what he defines as the "path of awakening."
Six secrets to be happier*
1. Manage your facial expression and you will manage your emotions.
For one week, do your best to smile at people you interact with, even those who don't like you or don't smile back.
2. Use your inner dialogue to support you and not to nullify you.
Do not use negative and self-limiting language with yourself. To avoid this type of dialogue, imagine that you are in front of a puddle of toxic water and that there is a stone in the middle of it.
If you make two jumps, one to place yourself on the stone and the other to jump from it, you will be able to overcome that puddle full of toxicity and come out unscathed.
Next, I will explain to you what those two jumps necessary to overcome the obstacle consist of:
FIRST JUMP:
ask yourself questions that invite you to observe:
What do I notice in my body?
For a minute, just watch.
For example: "I feel tightness in my chest", "I feel tension in my neck", "I feel great tension in my jaw"...
What is what i fell?
For example: "I'm afraid", "I'm worried", "I feel hopeless", "I feel anguish"...
What am I telling myself?
For example: "I am worthless", "this world is unfair"...
Video
"You should not deny emotions, nor feel guilty for feeling them," says the Spanish speaker who will give talks in the country this month.
SECOND JUMP:
it is about doing the same thing, but from a different perspective.
Only those who change their perspective can see different things:
What could I tell myself to feel better?
For example: "There are times when things have gone well for me in my life. Why shouldn't this be one of them?"
What am I starting to feel?
For example: "I feel less angry and less frustrated."
What do I notice in my body?
For example: "The tension in the jaw has gone down and the neck has relaxed a little."
What is the first step that I now feel most capable of taking?
Even if it's small, give it.
Step by step, you can improve your life to unsuspected levels.
3. Recharge your batteries or you will end up in the trash can.
Currently, the stress reaction is permanently activated in a large number of people.
We are often afraid when we are aware of the uncertainty in which we live.
This tension, this allostatic load that accumulates when we are constantly stressed, makes us lose efficiency, makes us irritable and can lead us to get sick.
To prevent this toxic load from accumulating, we need to perform a series of exercises.
The ideal is to do it
every two or three hours throughout the day
and, in addition, it will help us sleep better at night.
Take
10 deep breaths through the nose
through which the abdomen expands, exhaling through the mouth.
The expiration should be slightly longer than the inhalation.
Clench your fists tightly for about 30 seconds, then abruptly release the tension.
In addition to these practices, I recommend two others.
You should do the first
every day
and the second, when you feel emotions that steal your inner peace:
Walk for 10 minutes, three times a day
, so that your heart and breathing accelerate in a gentle and progressive way.
Grab a small piece of paper and write down the emotions you feel (hate, fear, anger...).
When you're done, she rips it up and throws it away.
Then, on a large sheet of paper, write how you want to feel and keep it.
Four times a day she remembers those words.
4. Nobody has as much influence on yourself as you do.
There is a simple and effective way to positively influence yourself and counteract the inner noise that generates so much suffering: practice gratitude for at least a week, three times a day and for five minutes.
It's about bringing your attention to what works in your life, to what helps you, and feeling it.
Use
sensations, feelings and images
, since thinking alone is less effective.
It is especially beneficial that one of the times is at night, which is when the memory is reconstructed.
So, before going to sleep, give thanks for all the good things you have in your life.
5. If you can imagine it, you can create it
It is very difficult for you to achieve something if you are not able to imagine it.
If you visualize a situation that you want to experience and feel it, you will be
inducing an emotional state
that can modify the connection between your neurons.
How to get it?
Ask yourself what your challenge is for that day and imagine the way you would like to face it.
You can close your eyes to make the exercise even more effective.
Feel the excitement, serenity and confidence as you approach that challenge that is the great opportunity to grow and evolve as a person.
6. There is no happiness without the other
In the morning, when you get up, decide that one of your priorities for this new day will be to ease someone's burden (give a smile, see how you can help them...).
You will notice the benefits in you too.
*
Fragment taken from The Path of Awakening.
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