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Are “making love” and “having sex” really the same thing?

2023-03-17T16:19:36.695Z


SEXOLOGY - Dr. Catherine Solano details the differences that can be established between the two and warns us about certain situations.


Dr. Catherine Solano is a sexologist doctor.

Trained in health ethics, she consults in urology at the Cochin hospital in Paris.

She is co-founder of Doctical, a telehealth platform that supports people affected by cancer in their intimate health.

She is the author of numerous books, including

Le grand livre de la puberté

(Robert Laffont editions).

In sexual matters as elsewhere, words have a meaning.

Depending on the terms used, the message is not the same.

Thus, "making love" or "having a sexual relationship" are not exactly the same thing.

But what is the difference exactly?

Making love can mean several things.

It can have the meaning of “making love come true”.

When we experience a feeling of love, we generally want to express it in a concrete way, so that this feeling does not remain in the head or in the heart, therefore in a way invisible.

This feeling is a force that wants to come out of us.

Making love highlights this feeling, allowing it to be embodied.

Read alsoCouple: is a fulfilling sexuality really necessary?

But it can also mean “making love”.

When we experience a sexual rapprochement, caresses, skin-to-skin contact and even more orgasm trigger a secretion of oxytocin that is sometimes called the love hormone.

This hormone stimulates attachment between two partners.

This is why regular sex literally “creates” love.

People who have a regular relationship with a friend (colloquially called a "

sex friend

"), and think they can manage not to get attached are wrong.

They always end up getting attached, because their hormones work for it.

Making love always creates attachment

I remember a couple who had formed for reasons of proximity.

They were roommates...

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Source: lefigaro

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